A Lego Batman Fanfic ( Eight Chapters So Far)

Chapter 7: Time To Tip The Boards In Our Favor

Knock-Knock-Knock

BANG!!!!

*glass shattering*

Bruce wayne rushed into the entry hall of the manor. One of his doors was knocked out and had fallen onto the ground. Joker was standing there acting like nothing happened.

Oh great.... I'm not even batman right now so I have to play dumb. "j-joker? W-what d-do you want from me?"

"your roommate"

"....my what?"

"your roommate!"

"i don't have a--! Oh... Ohhhh... Yeah okay I'll go get him"

"I can get him myself"

"n-no it's fine I'll get him"

"he's in his batcave right?"

"....yeah"

Joker headed down towards the batcave. Bruce bolted to his bedroom. He grabbed a cowl and extra suit, put them on hastily, and burst into the batcave dramatically.

"JOKER!"

Joker was ontop of batman's Tyrannosaurus "Hi bats."

Batman paused for a moment, "what did you do with that pilot?!?!"

"oh yknow, the usual, ya turn em insane, give them a part in your plan, and then they act like jerks!!"

".....what?"

Joker sighed, "I kidnapped him. Happy?"

"NEVER!"

"yeah no kidding."

"now get off my dinosaur"

"what?? No way! I'm staying up here!"

"no you aren't!"

"yes I am!"

"joker get down right now!"

"make me batface!"

Batman grappled Joker's waist. He pulled him down and caught him in his arms. The color of jokers face changed slightly.

"I hate you batman." Joker beamed.

Batman smirked at him, " 'hateya too j-bird" batman set him down.

"...will you always hate me?"

"J, how many times do I need to go over this with you? Yes I will always hate you. You give me purpose. You keep me up at night." batman then smiled slightly, "You are my one and only: greatest enemy"

Joker sighed, "oh batsy that sounded like poetry! I just hope Bill doesn't get in the way of our relationship "

Batman scoffed, "and how would anyone ever do that?"

".....I said that out loud?"

"yep. Now answer my question if you can."

"okay so I needed a pilot for my next plan... And he was the easiest option. I injected him with chemicals and now he's evil. And he turned my entire rogues gallery against me! Even Harley! So they helped him make a plan. A probably better one. And said he was gonna be your greatest enemy because you'll hate him so much. And so... I attacked him, and then they kicked me out of the hideout. And now I'm here. With you."

"you know what you could've done to avoid this?"

"what?"

"not inject him with chemicals? Don't mention that I am your weakness? Shut off all feelings and emotions and demand respect from him? All of those things would've kept him from wanting to become a super villain"

"are you sure you aren't one?"

"positive."

"'demand respect'.... Just... Rolls right off the tongue?"

"yeah, why?"

"eh, nothing."

"anyways there is no way I could hate anyone more than you. I despise your antics. And I despise you"

Joker's face definitely turned color this time.

Batman smirks, then realizes he's showing emotions around joker again. Goes back to having a straight face in an instant. "so.. What did you come here for"

"well I basically got thrown out of my house.... This is the only place I could think of to go." Joker said, a genuinely hopeful look on his face.

Batmans face instantly went hot.

Whooaaaaaa! okay! caught off my guard but not in combat. Oh brick. Help. Good thing I'm in a bricking mask right now. Why does this keep happening to me?? Oh... Ohhhhhhh nooooooo.... No nonono. Not happening. Not happening! He's my greatest enemy I am not--no..

Batman was silent for a while as he was having an internal crisis.

Joker frowned, "ah... Forget I said that?"

"okay" I won't ever forget that for the rest of my life will I?

"but--uhh... Maybe I could help?"

"help?"

"yeah bats...i don't want this idiot pilot. You don't want this idiot pilot. Make me a temporary member of your bat-family! I have inside knowledge of his plan! I could have my own superhero outfit!"

"hard pass"

".... Blink blink blink"

"nope"

"blinkity blink blink bliiinkk?"

"do you honestly think that will work on an emotionless vigilante?"

"mmmaybe?" Joker gets closer to his face, "blink blink bli-"

"OKAYokayyyyy!" batman pushed jokers face away from his, "Whatever... Just stop looking at me like that!"

Joker chuckled I'll have to use that face more often.