the reluctant wife

warning signs

Matt had a good day with Nicole and the girls that Saturday. They had a picnic. It was a fun day. Matt was concerned. He feared that she did not really want this. He feared that she felt pressure from her parents to date him. He feared that she was not really excited about the courtship. That caused him concern.
It was Sunday morning. He got up and took a shower. He made coffee. He got the kids up. He got them ready for church.  He loaded them into the van. He headed to the church. 
He pulled into the driveway.  He got the kids out of the van. They went into the church. He took me to the nursery. Chrisy went to her Sunday school church class.  Lindsey went to the auditorium. 
He went to his study. He got some things ready. He looked over his Sunday school notes.  After a time, he went to the auditorium.  He saw Nicole.  He smiled. He was not one who believes that you should have butterflies in your stomach when you're with your partner. When he saw her, he felt those butterflies. He smiled at her. 
"Hi nicky," he said. "Hello mathew. "She said. She made a half-smile. It seemed forced. " how are you today?" He asked. "I am.doing good. How are you?" she asked?  "I am good. "She said. He feared that had no chemistry. They seemed to have nothing to talk about. He wondered, was chemistry essential to a marriage. Could a couple that has nothing in common, that has nothing to talk about make a go of things?  Maybe they can. Maybe they can sit in silence and it would develop into something later.   If nothing developed, maybe that would be fine.  Is it biblical for a marriage to be a mutual defense pact? He never believed so but maybe you could. He was very sure he loved her. He was pretty convinced that she did not love him. He was not sure she could.
'Well I will talk to you later on." he told her. " of course." She answered.  They dispersed.
She sat next to Lindsey. "Good morning Linz. " Nicole said to Lindsey." good morning miss Nicole," she said.  He was glad she was reaching out to.his kid. That was a good sign. It was something. He feared that she would be more like living in a baby sister than a wife.  He would consider that and give it a lot of thought.  
He went to the podium. He started the service. He taught church history. He was covering the beginning of the Catholic church. He covered the time between the end of the new testament up to people Gregory, considered the first pope.   
He hung out with his kids and Nicole for a time before the start of the morning service. Then Chrissy went to junior church and EMI went to the nursery. He started the main service.
Other than commenting on her social media page, he did not really talk to her during the week.  He saw her at the midweek service. They said hi. They did not seem like a romantic couple. They barely seemed like acquaintances.
"Should I just walk away?" He asked his sister Marissa. "Do you want to walk away?" Marissa asked. "No rease.i really don't. I care about her deeply.  I feel protective of her. I want to defend her, guard her. She is not interested in me. I don't know if I am not her type, she is holding out for someone better or what. This is not working. I am not sure it is going to work.  I can't make her happy. She won't let me. " he said.
"Do you believe the Lord wants you to mary her?" She asked."it seems that the Lord has brought us together. He has put her on my heart.  I feel closer to her.  I have been praying for her. that has made me closer to her. I think she is. Maybe her reluctance is proof I should slow down even abort all this." he said.
"Maybe slowing down is not a bad idea.  I would caution you not to act rashly. dont rush to end this. " she told him. He knew that she was right. He took his sister's advice. He waited a while he took a step back. He revaluated his goals in life.
They talked a bit.  It was a small talk. There was no dept to what they talked about. He grew weary. He gave it some thought. he decided to tell her that he wanted to take a break. He figured that a break was almost certainly a breakup. He did not know what else to do at this point. 
He was looking for Nicole. He saw warren, her dad first. "Hey, can you guys come over for dinner on Tuesday?" Her dad asked. "Yes. Tuesday would be fine.  Thank you for inviting us." He said. "I want to do more of these. You guys are family now. You going to be but no reason to wait " warren said."no I agree definitely. " he told him.
Her dad took the wind of his sails. He decided not to break up with her right now. He had no idea what to do. Were these warning signs from the lord? Should he walk away? Should he stop? Was he just lonely? Was he simply pursuing her because she was single and available?   He did not know. That not knowing scared him greatly.  
Tuesday came. It was time for dinner with her family.  He dressed in a purple shirt and tan pants.  He got the kids ready to go.  They really liked to miss Nicole and her family. They liked her younger siblings who were similar in age to them.   They got in the van and headed for the home of Warren and Sheri.
He parked. It was warren and Sheri who greeted them. Nicky was nowhere to be found. They invited them inside. Nicky was playing with her younger siblings. She wore a blue blouse and a denim skirt. She was barefoot.   She looked up. "Hello mathew." She said.he said hello.
She invited matt's kids to join them. They were happy to join in. After a while, lunch was ready. Everyone went into the dining room.  
"Nick you will sit next to matt. Chrissy will not next to matt and EMI will sit next to nicky. Then Lindsey will be next to me." Sheri said.
"If you sitting next to me, you have to be on your best behavior.  " Nicole said to Em in a joking tone. "I will" the two-year-old promised.   She laughed.
The dinner went really well. Matt mostly talked to Nicole's parents. Nicole said little. She talked to his kids but she was not involved in the conversation matt and her parents were.
After the meal,  they went into the living room. Nicole talked to the girls .matt and Nicole talked little. He got.discourged. he did not say anything. Warren and Sheri seemed to.really enjoy the visit. They both put a lot of work into it. He did not want to.disparege that. It was fun. He wanted to make a connection to Nicole.ao far he had not. It seemed impossible.  That made him sad. It made him worried.   
He went home disillusioned. He put the kids to bed. He got thinking. He considered his next move. He considered what to do. 
He looked at her social media page. He saw she liked mints. She likes the thin mints. He decided to get her a big box of them. He had it shipped to her house.  He got a sam's club quantity.he had it shipped to her home.
"Nick you got A package," her dad said. "Really? " she said. she was surprised. She came downstairs. She opened it. "It's hr mints. A lot of them," she said. "Who sent her jr mints?" Her six-year-old brother asked. "Mathew," she said. She was thankful but a little embarrassed. She did share with her family. Her siblings teased her about it.
"Mathew! Thank you for the mints. Those are my favorites." She said. I saw that on Facebook. I wanted to surprise you. "He said. " I was definitely surprised. "She said. " I wanted to do something for you. I know its small. I figured to start off small. "He said. " I was pleasantly surprised.    "She said.
" you don't have to give my gifts. I am not like that.  I am not materialistic. I don't need to be bribed. "She said." I know that. I like to do it. something hears and now. "He said. " of course, "she said.
He felt like it was a bit of a fail. He decided not to give her gifts. She was not one to like gifts. He wanted to see what she liked and did not like. 
He wanted to get to know her more. H looked more closely at her social media page. She did like contemporary Christian music.  I.f.b was not real keen on ccm. G.b.c was a firm believer in the old hymns. They sang the old hymns. They had a piano and an organ.  Th pastor did not take a stand on ccm. Unlike many in the I.f.b, he did not condemn ccm in his sermon as was common. He was not surprised that she listened to it.
Her family watched older shows. They did not get involved in pop culture.  She herself avoided the tends of the world. She seemed to like westerns. She liked dragnet.
" I was nodding around your Facebook page. I see you not really into modern television. "He remarked. " my parents had strict rules about our television viewing.  I am constantly reminded of Philipiens 4:8. My dad always says, what is your mission? What is your goal in life?  If it is to glorify God. Everything should flow from that. I tend to avoid modern television. "She admitted.
" Is this a conviction of yours?" He asked. "I did not realize that until now but yes it is," she told him.  "You like dragnet?" He asked. She chuckled. "As a kid, I wanted to be a female version of Joe Friday," she said. "I could see that. ," he said.
They seemed to have a moment..perhaps they turned the corner. Then she went back to her guarded self. They hung out hear And there. She seemed to be more interested in the kids.
They seemed to have little in common other then they like Jesus and his kids. She seemed to want to let him in..there relationship was very platonic. They never held hands. They hugged occasionally. It was usually pushed by her parents. 
He really considered breaking up with her. He did not want to but he felt that it might be the right thing to do.  It was not getting better. It was clear she was not interested in him. It bothers him greatly.
He tried to keep a happy tone. He did not want anything to know what he was going through. 
She seemed to retreat form him. She volunteered to babysit the girls. She invited them over for sleepovers at her house. She seemed to be setting up their life together.  She seemed to be retreating for him.
He feared that she wanted a platonic relationship with him. More like a business relationship. He did not want that. That might be the only thing available to him. He was not sure he was ok with that. Did he really want to sever ties with her?

Next up
As Nicole celebrates her 19th birthday, Warren pushes matt to propose to her.  Matt considers what to do.