Zafirah

Introduction

Dear Mr. Stockman,

I find it rather amusing how you are requiring us to complete a journal over summer break. I mean, we are technically college students after all. You won't see us again unless you have some supernatural ability to turn back time- which, looking to the fact that you have a balding head and quite the track record in failed marriages, I seriously doubt you do. My plan was never to fill out this journal. Especially not today on my birthday. But then I figured why not. You see, I'm going on a big adventure this summer and I don't really have anyone to talk to about it. Only these blank pieces of paper that a theoretical you might theoretically read in the future. So, Mr. Stockman, I will give in. I will write in this journal every single day of the summer, but I can't guarantee you award-winning journal entries that would make Maya Angelou jealous, no. But I will give it my best shot.

___________________

Day One: The Introduction to my life ft. my birthday

They say that nature seeks to comfort you in ways that no one else can- a connection between you and a different dimension. The more time you spend surrounding yourself with the natural environment, the easier it becomes for you to hear, to think, and to feel.

Nature, they say, holds all the answers.

As a kid, I had spent hours walking through local parks and forests, basking in the nihility.

It was strange.

I was strange.

Nonetheless, they were right. At that moment, I was comforted; I had a connection. As time went on, however, that relationship slowly dissipated. Because, despite all that they had said, they failed to mention that nothing lasts forever. Not even nature's unsolicited friendship.

To say my parents were relieved would be an understatement. No longer did they have to worry about their child disappearing for hours upon hours. Or have to explain to people why I knew more about animals and photosynthesis than I did about my own religion, Islam. You see, it wasn't that I was ignorant or lazy- I really did love my dīn. It gave me an identity. However, the problem was that I didn't know why. I didn't know why I loved my religion and that whole time I had delved in nature, it was me searching for the answer. I had naively figured that by following the trail of ants, the flight of birds, and the herd of deer, I too would find my destination. But that, as you probably guessed, didn't exactly happen. In actuality, it only led me back to a pair of worrisome parents with mud in my shoes and leaves in my hair.

And so, I gave up.

And then, I grew up. Without nature's accompaniment; without a reason why.

In high school, I became highly involved: joined various clubs, fit into multiple friend groups, did well academically, etc. But that one unanswered question kept popping up no matter how much I pushed it down: why do I believe?

I prayed five times everyday, fasted the month of Ramadan, read the Quran, and became highly involved at the local Mosque.

Somehow, I had hoped, doing all that would help.

But the question still lingered.

So, I decided that the summer I turned eighteen (that's today), I would embark upon an aimless endeavor to get my answer.

And this time, I know for a fact that I will find it.

My name is Zafirah and I don't exactly know who I am.

But today's the day I start.

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Definitions:

Dīn: sometimes translated as "religion," but as used in the Qur'an, it refers both to the path along which righteous Muslims travel in order to comply with divine law

Ramadan: the ninth month of the Muslim year, during which fasting is observed from sunrise to sunset

Mosque (Masjid): A place of worship for Muslims

Quran: The Holy Book of Islam

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Hey everyone! I hope you liked this little introduction to Zafirah. This book is nothing like I've ever written before. It's a bit of realistic fiction, mixed with humor, and even a little romance.

It's going to revolve around the main character's life and her experience with religion. I believe that a lot of you- regardless of your religion or beliefs- will be able to relate to this book very well. It's takes a very modern and grounded look on the life of a Muslim-American teenager and about coming-of-age at a late stage. However, I'm going to have to warn you that there may be be some things that you may not approve of. And that's okay. But please don't comment anything disrespectful. The whole point of me writing this book is to show some of the struggles and thoughts that I've gone through and how many other teens (especially from religious and/or diverse backgrounds) go through. They're not all pretty and they're not all correct, but that is reality.

So. Yes, it is based off of me in some respects but definitely not all.

Please let me know your thoughts!

Thank you for your love and patience!

Manaal :)