Crush Culture

Part 6

"It's Taehyung's."

You nearly drop it as his name leaves her lips. The name causes your stomach to tighten, mouth-drying instantly as emotions well behind your eyes.

"Why?" Is all you can mutter out. Why was she giving it to you, why was she here, and why did she have it?

"You need to bring it back to him." She says sternly, her eyes locked on you as she waits for you to look back at her. But you're too focused on the umbrella placed gently in your hands, tracing your finger over every wire and the soft rubber handle.

"I can't." Your words come out in a whisper, breath light and airy as you sigh, sinking your body back into the couch cushions. Giving the umbrella back to Taehyung will mean that you have to go see him. And if you see him, he's going to want to talk to you about last night, then question you about why you haven't been returning his texts. No. You will not be giving Taehyung his umbrella back.

"Y/N," your name leaves her mouth gently, a sigh following it before she reached for you, rubbing your arm comfortingly before continuing, "I think you need to talk to him."

"Lainey," you let out an annoyed sigh, "you know I can't do that."

You're serious in your words. Not that you don't want to talk to him. If you could, you would, but you can't. There are too many emotions involved. The wound is fresh and seeing him would be rubbing salt right into it.

"Y/N," she sighs, this time more forceful, she's trying to get something across to you but it's going right over your head. "Talk to him. Please."

"You know I'm going to end up hurt if I do."

Tears well in your eyes as the words croak from your throat. It's dry and scratchy, full of fear and anxiety.

"I think you'd be surprised," she mumbles, her eyes instantly widening on realizing the words that just escaped.

Eyes wide with confusion, they're begging her to go on, but if she does then Taehyung won't be the only one in deep shit right now. You can't know what she knows.

"What do you mean I'll be surprised?"

"I have to go," she stands instantly, motioning to the umbrella, "and you need to bring this back."

With a slight ruffle to your hair, Lainey is giving you a supporting smile and waving goodbye. And you're left alone once again – just you and Taehyung's blue umbrella.

It takes a lot of courage to get ready today. You make sure to take your sweet time rummaging through your closet, flipping through articles of clothing for the better half of an hour. At the end, you opt to go with a pair of sweatpants and an old t-shirt. There isn't enough energy in your body to put on anything else, and you know you'll just want to curl back up in bed once you get home. Sweatpants are safe, and safe is just what you need.

No makeup today either. If things are anything like you're expecting, your makeup will just end up ruined anyway. It's your better judgment to shower though, you've neglected to take one after work last night; opting to just bury yourself under your covers as soon as you got back. But today is a new day. And with a fresh shower and your comfiest pair of sweatpants, you are about as ready as you'll ever be to get your heart broken into a billion pieces.

Umbrella in hand, you step out onto your front steps, relishing in your last few moments of ignorant bliss before making your way to Taehyung's. You immediately regret your wardrobe decision as the sun beats down on your frame, the humidity making you feel sticky and gross – your favorite pants are no match for this heat.

But you're on your way to your destination anyway, the drive feeling longer and more drawn out than normal. Taehyung didn't live that far away from you, but the ride there still felt like an eternity with each theoretical scenario passing your mind.

Dragging your feet, you make your way to the front steps of his house. You've been here a million times, but today is different. From now on, every time you drive past this place all you'll know is heartache.

You brush yourself off, taking a deep breath before bringing your hand up and pushing the doorbell. The sudden ringing sound startles you, even though you have every indication that it's coming – you're just too nervous and jumpy for your own good.

Footsteps approach the door, your stomach tightening more and more with the muffled pitter-patter of footsteps. You're praying to God that it's his mom, hoping that Taehyung just so happens to be out – even though his car is in plain sight parked just a few meters away from you. Wishful thinking, you suppose.

When the door to his house opens, you struggle to maintain your composure. He's dressed similarly to you; a pair of sweats and an old sports t-shirt that has definitely seen better days.

"Hi."