Aftermath

Part 16

Cristina started laughing again, causing me to laugh as well.

"You're so drunk, Mer!" 

"Not as drunk as you!" 

Joe looked over at us, shaking his head gently. The bar had cleared out a little, so it was quieter. We were definitely being obnoxious, but who cared? 

"Oh god," Cristina groaned, trying to catch her breath. 

"My stomach hurts," I giggled.

"What time is it?" Cristina yelled to Joe. 

"Midnight. Your cabs are here, go home," 

Cristina hiccuped and grabbed her purse, standing up a little wobbly. I followed her out the door, yelling a thanks at Joe. 

"You're off tomorrow right?" I asked Cristina. Hangovers were going to be bad in the morning.

"Yep, you?"

I nodded, catching Cristina as she nearly fell from tripping over her own shoes. I was clearly not even close to as drunk as her, so I helped her into the cab and told the driver where to go. 

Before I closed the door, Cristina leaned over and kissed me. I pulled away to stare at her as she giggled. She wouldn't remember a bit of this tomorrow.

"Thanks, Mary!" She called.

I wiped my lips and smiled back awkwardly. 

"It's Mer, but you're welcome," 

She waved to me through the window as the cab pulled away and I got into my own, studying the leather seats as the driver took me home. 

When he pulled into the driveway I paid him and made my way into the house. I tried to be quiet as I made my way upstairs, confused when I saw light coming from the crack in the door to my bedroom.

I pushed open the door, blinking at the seemingly blinding light. 

"Meredith! Finally, god, I was worried about you," Derek was sitting in the edge of the bed. 

"I'm a little tipsy," I stated, collapsing onto our bed and throwing off my shoes.

"I can smell the tequila, you want to shower?" He asked, walking over to me.

"Yes please," I got up from the bed and into the bathroom. Derek stood by just in case I needed help and rolled his eyes and shook his head at all my stupid comments. 

He turned on the shower and I stripped, jumping into the hot water. After a minute, I poked my head out and saw Derek sitting on the toilet seat, waiting for me.

"You wanna have sex?" I smirked. 

He looked shocked for a second, then recovered. "No. Mer, you're not ready. And you're drunk,"

I gave him a pouty face. "Tipsy," I corrected before finishing my shower and drying off. 

"Let's get to bed. You'll regret this in the morning,"

"God, I know," I giggled.

Derek tossed me one of his shirts and panties, which I put on and I slid into bed. 

"Sorry I scared you. I told you I was gonna be home late," I said from my spot in bed. 

"I know, but I worry about you," He responded as he slipped into bed behind me.

"You don't have to, I'm not the one you should be worrying about,"

He turned the lights off and pulled me closer to him so we could spoon. 

"Let's have this conversation tomorrow, when you're sober," 

I giggled a little, and was quickly overtaken by sleep. 

Meredith downed her second shot of tequila and glanced at her husband sitting next to her at Joe's. Cristina, on Meredith's other side ordered another round. Just as they were all about to take the shots, the bell on the door rang, signaling that someone was entering the bar. 

No one thought anything of it, there were lots of people in the bar. Until there was a loud bang. Followed by screams. The smell of blood engulfed Meredith, and she turned around. Derek and Cristina didn't seem to notice.

Meredith found herself face to face with Gary Clark, so was taking aim at Derek.

Meredith screamed, calling Derek's name and trying to get his attention. He didn't respond, it was like she wasn't really there.

Then the gun went off. Derek fell to the ground in a pool of his own blood. Meredith began crying, desperately trying to stop the bleeding.

"Meredith!" A voice called. 

"Meredith!" Derek's voice jerked me out of my dream. 

I bolted upright in bed, chest heaving.

"Oh my god," I managed between between my gasps.

My heart was pounding and I was slightly sweaty, tear stains on my cheeks.

"Are you okay?" Derek's voice sounded behind me.

I turned to see my husband sitting upright in bed beside me, looking concerned.

"I'm sorry," I breathed, brushing my hair out of my face.

"Don't be sorry. Are you okay?"

I was about to respond when my stomach heaved. I jumped out of bed and barley made it to the toilet in time to puke. The headache of a hangover set in as I sunk to the ground beside the toilet, knowing more vomiting was soon to happen.

"What was that about?" Derek asked from the doorway of the bathroom.

"The screaming or the puking? I think you know the answer to both,"

"Meredith," He sighed.

I leaned over and threw up again, and Derek was at my side holding my hair back. When I finished, I wiped my mouth with a piece of toilet paper and leaned back against the wall. 

"Talk to me," His tone made the command come off like a question, like he was begging me.

"I don't want to talk about it," I murmured. "What time is it?"

"Eight in the morning,"

I groaned. "Derek, I'm exhausted,"

He gave me a confused look.

"I just...I want to be able to sleep. I want to go back to the way things were. I don't feel safe anymore. I need  to just be able to sleep without having to relive the worst day of my life over and over again," 

Derek crouched down next to me.

"I don't really know how to help you," He admitted.

I met his gaze. He looked guilty. I forced a half smile. 

"Neither do I,"

That night, I asked Lexie to stay in Alex's room so Derek's mom would have somewhere to sleep when she arrived the next day. Thankfully she agreed and since I had recovered from my hangover and had basically been avoiding Derek since our conversation that morning, I was cleaning the house.

Every inch had to be clean when Carolyn Shepherd arrived. I wasn't going to let that woman think I was a slob. Finally satisfied with my work, I went to lecture my roommates about being on their best behavior while she was here. 

I sighed, trying to keep myself from freaking out.

It was fine.

I was fine.

Everything was going to be fine.