He kissed me. Kim Taehyung, the person who used to hate me, kissed me. It felt amazing though, he's a great kisser. Clearly, he is experienced, so I was a bit embarrassed about my own inexperience. I'm still confused as to why, out of everyone, would he kiss me? Does he have feelings for me? I thought he was straight, but now that I think he never really clarified his sexuality. After the kiss, the air was filled with a mixture of awkward and sexual tension. Taehyung was silent after our little moment, and it kind of made me feel slightly insecure. Was I really bad? Maybe kissing me was too weird and he regretted it. Many of these kinds of thoughts filled my brain. So here I lay to struggle with pink cheeks and a heavy heart, next to him. We both stayed in the same bed to sleep, even though we kept quiet. Sneaking a glance at the boy, I was disappointed to see his back facing me. Do not tell me he fell asleep after that. Feeling slightly upset, I turn my back towards him and close my eyes attempting to fall asleep. Minutes later, I hear shuffling and suddenly two strong arms were wrapped around my waist. Taehyung was spooning me, with his head resting on top of mine. A smile of content graced my face, and my hands lay where his large ones rested.
In the morning, Taehyung acted like he would any other day and it bothered me. Why isn't he just as affected as me? Did that kiss mean nothing to him? " 'Morning Minnie." I always loved the sound of his morning voice, especially when he says my name. "Good morning Tae." He smiles at me and I can't help but smile back. No matter how upset I felt about his nonchalance, I still love his cute box grin.
Before walking to school, we went to my house so I could get ready. After showering I walked into my bedroom, the odor of weed filling my nostrils. Rolling my eyes, I quickly shut the door. "Taehyung, my mom is still here! What the hell do you think you're doing?" I whisper-shout, glaring at the smug boy. He lay on my bed, with his head rested against the headboard and blunt in hand. Taking a long drag, he inhales and breathes out. "I always smoke before school." My eyebrows furrow at his response. "Why couldn't you at least wait till we start walking?" The boy shrugged, "I wanted it now, I guess." He gave a relaxed chuckle. His eyes were hooded and he seemed like he wasn't entirely present. "That's not a good enough excuse Taehyung." I scold, grabbing some clothes. "Close your eyes." I tell him so that I could get dressed properly. "Ok Tae, let's go." Grabbing my book bag, I make sure I have everything I need. "Wait, co'mere for a sec." He beckons me close, with his long fingers. When I got close to him, he pulled me onto his lap. Startled, I latch onto his neck to regain my balance. "Here." I follow his hand, and saw the blunt in his hand. Taking it, I reluctantly bring it to my lips. I've done this before, why am I so nervous again? I remember what he told me to do the first time, and apply it to this moment. Inhaling slowly, I allow the smoke to fill me up and I instantly relax. A few sips later, Taehyung has to literally pry the joint out of my stubby fingers. "Damn, you are enjoying this a bit too much." The taller male comments. Rolling my eyes, I scoff. "And whose fault is that?"
Entering the building, we made it just in time for breakfast. We saw our group of friends gathered together at one table. "Tae! You didn't tell us whether the baby is yours or not." Namjoon immediately says when we reach their table. Oh my goodness. I was so in my head about our kiss, I almost forgot about the paternity test results. "It's mine." The male reveals simply, making our friends' jaws' drop. "How are you so calm?"Jungkook asks his best friend with narrowed eyes. "I got allot of the initial emotion and frustration out last night. Now I just feel really numb, plus I'm high as fuck right now." He answers with a pained grin. "Is that why Jimin was at your house last night? Since when did ya'll start getting so close?" Jin interrogates. "Yeah, you told him this information before us. And you guys are just having little sleepovers together, all of a sudden." Hoseok adds, with an undetectable emotion in his eyes. "Damn, all these questions. It's too early for an interrogation." Taehyung complains, completely dismissing his friends' curiosity. This whole time I was silent and suddenly everyone's eyes were on me. I couldn't tell if they were upset or just annoyed by the lack of information. Which is understandable, no one likes to be out of the loop. Feeling shy from all the sudden attention, I look down in an attempt to avoid the stares. "So Jimin, can you give us an explanation? Since this fucker doesn't feel like talking." Yoongi says, rolling his eyes. Feeling put on the spot, I gulp nervously. "Uh, I-I don't know. We have become closer these past few weeks and are hanging out more often." I shrug, feeling extremely put on the spot and plain out awkward. They all mumble an ok and go on about their business. I could tell that they were still slightly salty though. Too busy sulking, I didn't notice an arm slinking around my shoulders. Looking up, I see Taehyung staring down at me with a serious expression. He pulled me closer and leaned down so that his lips were by my ear. "Don't mention that kiss to anybody, ok? Let's just forget it ever happened." The words he spoke triggered a type of sadness deep within me. I don't know why, but it really hit hard when he said that. "Why?" My voice cracked and I could feel tears start to well up. "Listen Jimin, it's not worth remembering something regretful." Those words really struck a cord and that's when I really started to break down. Before I could burst out into sobs, I held it in and mustered up a fake smile. "Y-yeah, I guess you're right." I walked away to prevent myself from showing any of my true feelings.
Seriously, I can't understand why his words hit me so hard. Just the way he said it, was so cold and it made me feel really empty. Like his choice of words, regret, forget it happened. It made me feel like he didn't enjoy it, and he's the one who kissed me. Am I that disgusting? Am I ugly? Maybe he wanted to try kissing a boy and he used me to experiment. Was I that bad and now he regrets kissing a boy. I just thought that maybe he wanted to be more than friends. He is pretty flirty with me, but maybe I just comprehend it that way. Why do I want him to like me so much? Maybe because I have developed feelings. I don't know how or when I did but, now that I think about it this attachment I have with him is most likely because I developed feelings. "Oh my gosh. I have a crush on Taehyung." I whisper to myself.
JiMinnieMouse
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