The Seed Of Azrael

The Dark Side

“Rejecting? That’s hillarious, Dark, what are you?”

He held his hands up in surrender before turning his back from me. Naramdaman kong yumakap si Anael sa akin. Sa pang-ilang beses na, umiiyak na naman siya. “H’wag na galit si Dream. Mahal na mahal ni Anael si Dream. Tama na. Mahal na mahal ni Anael si Dream. H’wag na galit. Nasasaktan si Anael.” :'(

Kumabog ng malakas ang puso ko nang tumingin siya sa’kin with those pleading eyes. Na parang ipinararating niyang may kaugnayan ang sinasabi ni Anael sa akin sa gusto niyang sabihin.

“Angels never lie, Dream.”

Oh God…

I shook my head furiously. “No, sorry, it’s not gonna work. Not again, Dark.”

Mabilis pa sa alas-kwatro na napunta siya sa harap ko’t nayakap ako ng mahigpit. “I’ll make it work. Just trust me again, I promise you I’ll make it work. Give me another chance, Dream. I’ve… I’ve been through so much without you. I’ve been through so much just finding you. I need you. Please, I need you so badly. J-Just one chance… just one…”

“Why?”

“I…” his hold on my waist tightened. I felt like… like he’s holding on to me for dear life. “I love you so damn much that I’m gonna die with a few more days of not being with you. I’d give anything for you to just take me back. Please…”

“Why now?” it’s just that moment that I realized my lips are quivering. Hindi ko alam kung para saan pero ang lakas-lakas ng tibok ng puso ko ngayon. Gusto kong maniwala kay Dark pero paano kung… paano kung maulit ang mga nangyari dati?

Paano kung iwan na naman niya ako?

“They…” lalong humigpit ang yakap niya sa’kin. Naramdaman ko ang panginginig ng buong katawan niya sa galit. I had the urge to hold him. Pero natatakot ako. Natatakot ako sa sarili ko. Natatakot akong makaramdam ng hindi dapat. “They betrayed me. Creed was sent by Hecate—my mother—to trick me to kill an angel. That way, I’ll be an absolute impure. She can claim me when that happens. I was looking for you all around the world when they trapped me to Gehenna to be damned there until I choose to kill. I didn’t let that happen. I wanted to see you so badly that it… Dream, I wanted to be with you again so I kept myself alive for so long. Huli na nang malaman kong binura nila ang alaala mo para hindi mo’ko makilala. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Dream.”

I heard agony with every sobs he makes. I feel how tortured his heart and soul was and for the first time, I knew I was aching for him.

I never believed that Gehenna existed. My Dad told me that he never… saw anything like it. But Mom told me it was true. That Gehenna is a place for an eternal struggle. And I’m quite thankful that Dark made it out from there. That he’s here, holding me. That he’s here, pleading for another chance.

“Katherine…” my voice croaked. “Do you love Katherine?”

Unti-unti siyang nag-angat ng paningin. He pulled away just an inch that I could feel his warm breathing against my pursed lips. Then he shook his head like a kid saying no. “What makes you think I do? Because people said so? Because people… keep telling you that I’m gonna leave you for another woman?”

“Hell yeah, you did.”

“I never.” Tears… they fell from his eyes like waterfalls. Like a stream of warm spring. They wet his face until they reached his shaking lips. “I never left that damn hospital, Dream. Only minutes from sending you there I went in again and tried to retrieve you. But they didn’t let me near you. I searched for other ways to get you out of there but Creed… fvck him, I wanted to kill him, Dream. He took you away from me…”

Gusto kong maglaho na lang ng parang bula kesa ang tumayo dito at pagmasdang umiiyak si Dark sa harapan ko. Habang hawak ako. Habang galit na galit siya sa parehong lalaki na nagturo sa akin kung paano gamitin ang kapangyarihang meron ako para pahirapan si Dark. It’s to his benefit and I don’t know why I believed him. Maybe because what he said was only the truth and that I know he didn’t lied. And he used the truth so he can manipulate me without me knowing.

How wise of him.

“Katherine is a mortal servitor.” He said when he slightly calmed down from his brief rage. “Her ancestors knows about angels and they served me for too long. They don’t grow old or vanish unless either I kill them or they reproduce another lineage that will serve me for the time being. That’s why you heard rumors like that around the club. Katherine serves me. But she didn’t mean anything to me as how much you do.”

“Why do I have to be that special one who means that much to you? Sa’yo na nanggaling. Matagal ka nang buhay, Dark. You could’ve found someone better than me. Is it the fact na nasa’yo ang puso ko? Is it the damn fact na may taling nag-uugnay sa’yo sa akin kaya pakiramdam mo dapat maging tayo?”

Umiling siya ng mabilis, like emphasizing his NO. “I don’t just want you, Dream. Bingi ka ba? You could take your heart from me but it’s not gonna change anything that I feel for you! I don’t just want you. I need you. I ache for you. I love you. I didn’t hold on this long for my own life, for my own good. I held onto this life because I wanted to serve you. To wake up every single day and see you sleeping in peace. I wanted to love you the way I didn’t had the chance to do back then. I wanted to stake every single piece of my heart with loving you, not caring if you’ll… if you’ll stop loving me eventually. I just wanted to be with you. I just want you to let me love you and stay with you until I die. Kuntento na’ko do’n. Hindi ako humihingi ng sobra-sobra. Ito lang ang gusto ko.”

It’s days like this that I wish I’m just as cruel as devils are so I can turn down Dark’s begging. Sino ba namang lolokohin ko? Masasaktan ba ako ng ganito kung hindi ko siya mahal?