I Thought It Would Be Me (Sparia)

I thought it would be me

I thought it would be me Spencer thought. Seeing her with Ezra broke her heart. Not broke, more like wounded. A broken heart can be fixed. Over time a broken heart can heal, the pieces will eventually come together, like a puzzle. It may take a while to complete the puzzle when you have not yet seen the picture; but it can be done, eventually, with trial and error. Sometimes you try to put two pieces together that just don't fit, but you learn from your mistakes and do things differently with the next piece of the puzzle. It will be done, eventually. But a wounded heart, that is something you cannot fix. Something that cannot heal, even with time. You feel pain with every step you take; every second of every day. Every living moment, you feel pain; and nothing else. No matter what you do or what you think about you will always have that throbbing pain inside your chest, constantly reminding you of what happened, making sure you never forget it. That throbbing pain that gets worse every time you touch it; every time you add a little more pressure to the bruise the pain gets worse and worse with each touch.

Spencer thought the pain would eventually stop, that she would eventually forget about how the love of her life chose Ezra and not her. After everything they've been through, she thought that maybe, just maybe Aria would realise it's been her all along. When she cried, it was Spencer who wiped away her tears. When she was afraid, it was Spencer who held her tight in her arms, and refused to ever let go until Aria felt safe again. It was Spencer who held her hand when she needed the support. When she needed Ezra and he wasn't there, it was Spencer who was there for her instead. When he told her about Maggie, Spencer was there for her. She made sure Ezra knew what would happen if he were to ever hurt Aria. When he told her about the book, Spencer was the for her, and she never left her side. She was there when Ezra wasn't, when he should have been. Spencer is the one who always stares at her when she isn't looking, who appreciates everything she does and everything she is. Spencer is the one who rushes to Aria when she's in trouble, and Aria has always done the same for her. When Spencer talked to Ezra about his son without Aria's permission, she thought Aria would hate her, but she didn't. When she dragged Aria to that party and Noel bullied her, she thought she would kill her. But she didn't. All those times Aria found Spencer at her worst, she thought she would abandon her. But she didn't.

After all that Spencer thought she would pick her. But she didn't.