Such Deceiving Forms is a fanfic by ProcrastinatingStudi . Go follow them and read their book if you haven't already. Also, spoilers.
Most of these are just Joey being a terrible person tbh-
Joey: Two shots, of vodka...
Joey: *pours the entire bottle*
———
Teenage Joey: Don't tell your mother!
Teenage Vivian: Kiss one another?...
Teenage Joey: DIE FOR EACHOTHER
Teenage Vivian: *falls over*
———
Joey: Okay you know what- YOU'RE IN TIMEOUT! GET ON TOP OF THE FRIDGE! GET UP THERE!
Kid Sam: This house is a fUCKING NIGHTMARE-
———
Joey: Every time you yell at your kids, put a quarter in your no-yelling sock, and soon you'll have a weaPON TO BEAT-
———
Sam: I AM THE NECKLACE GUARDIAN! GUARDIAN OF THE NECKLACE!
Kyle: MONDELLA QUIVERS BEFORE HER
Sam: *to the scientists* FUCK OFF
———
Eteled: Owimoweh
Kyle: Owimoweh
Kate: Owimoweh
Nathan: Owimoweh
Sam: EEEEEEEEEEEE-
———
Joey: How old are you?
6 y/o Sam: Six.
Joey: *picks her up and yeets her into a lake*
———
Joey:
Joey: That moment when you walk into a room and forget why you're in there- *gets stabbed by Sam*
Joey's ghost: Oh that's right, I was getting chased by my crazy daughter!
———
Female scientist: *hiding*
Kyle in Chroma form:
Kyle: Red robin!~
Female scientist: *jumps out from closet* Yum!
Female scientist: *panicking* OH NO, OH NO-
———
Sam in the first few chapters: Aaaaah- heh
Sam in the later chapters: Aaaaaaaaah...
Sam in the second book: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
———
Joey: Hey so today my daughter pushed me, so I'm starting a kickstarter to put her down.
Joey: The benefits of killing her would be, I would get pushed way less-
———
Vivian: *pointing camera at 5 y/o Sam* Say Colorado!-
Joey: *running by* I'M A GIRAFFE!
———
Joey: Go! *pulling the sled from beneath Sam* Heheheheh...
Joey: Get! *pulls it again*
