[In Another Life] Bokuaka ᴀɴɢsᴛ

Chapter 4

The sound of rain pelting hard against the window snapped Akaashi back into reality. He looked around in weary haste, but calmed quickly once his memory had returned to him. He'd nodded off for a brief moment, with his arms crossed and his head resting on a thick bundle of pillows. With much effort, he sat up to look at Bokuto.
The movie was well over two hours in, nearing its end, and Bokuto lay on his side, curled up and clutching the blanket with what little strength he had left. His eyes were half-lidded and glued to the screen, his face void of emotion. It almost looked as if he were asleep.
"Bokuto?" Akaashi's voice was groggy.
Slowly, his yellow eyes scrolled to the side to catch Akaashi's gaze. He turned his head weakly, and his body along with it.
"I'm sorry. I've watched this movie so many times, I actually fell asleep." Akaashi dragged a hand down his face.
"Don't be sorry." Bokuto found himself smiling. "It's your house. You sleep if you want to."
"Not if I have a visitor over."
"It's fine. I'm not just some visitor, after all. We're friends." Bokuto's head lolled to the side, directing his attention back to the movie. "You were out for about an hour."
Akaashi heaved a sigh. He rubbed the back of his neck.
"I envy you. I wish I could sleep like that again."
Guilt bubbled up within Akaashi's chest. He'd realized just how rude that was, falling asleep so easily in front of a person who's biggest struggle was just that.
"How... insensitive of me..." He furrowed his brow, mentally scolding himself.
"Don't cry over it." Bokuto shifted as he lay down, sticking a leg out to kick Akaashi. "The movie kept me company. It's very good. Kind of confusing, but good. I'll have to watch it again."
Strange. Bokuto was such a strange one. He seemed to be unfazed by many things, and blatant about others, blurting sentences out that didn't seem to have much thought behind them. Akaashi doubted that he'd ever have Bokuto over again, so hearing him say 'I'll have to watch it again,' didn't sit too well with him.
Akaashi twisted his lips to the side and decided to bring up something else. "Are you tired?"
"Exhausted." Bokuto answered honestly.
"Close your eyes for the time being." Akaashi kicked his legs out of bed with much effort and stood on his feet. "I'll get us some water." He left the room quickly, leaving Bokuto by his lonesome.
After several seconds, he'd returned to see that Bokuto had changed his position in bed entirely. He lay on his back, with his head on some of Akaashi's pillows. His hands rested on his stomach, the dark blanket surrounding him from behind, but slipping off just enough for his torso to be exposed. His head rested against the bed, slumped to the side, facing away from Akaashi.
Again, if he hadn't known any better, Akaashi would have figured that Bokuto was already fast asleep. He approached his bedside silently. The room was dark, apart from the soft orange glow that his lamp gave off.
He set the drinks down and shuffled into bed, as if trying not to wake the other. Lying on his back, he stared at the ceiling.
No words were exchanged for what seemed like forever before Akaashi spoke up.
"How does it feel? To not be able to sleep?"
Bokuto's answer was delayed. "Awful." He turned his head in the opposite direction, facing Akaashi now. "I can barely keep my eyes open by day, and can barely keep them closed by night." He snorted in laughter.
"Does it frustrate you?"
"It did at first, when I didn't understand why. But now I'm kind of okay with it." A hand reached up to push through his own messy locks. "I still miss it though. Sleeping. Dreaming."
Akaashi watched Bokuto, listening to every word he said.
"I used to have some insane dreams, too. Especially before certain volleyball matches." He laughed again, louder this time. "I'd dream that I messed up during a spike, and then I'd wake up fuming, and would constantly tell myself that I was the best."
"Do you still think that you are the best?" Emerald eyes searched Bokuto's own for an honest answer.
He sighed his response with a grin. "Yeah." Bokuto closed his eyes after that, one hand resting on the side of his head. He was obviously tired, showing signs of exhaustion with every small move he made.
Akaashi grew silent and knitted his fingers together on his stomach, his head relaxing into his pillow. The both of them didn't exchange any words after that, ending the conversation just as suddenly as it had started.

Two hours had passed since their last words towards each other, yet Akaashi still lay awake in bed. Unknown to Bokuto, he watched him quietly through almost closed eyelids, his thick lashes being enough to hide the fact that he was still awake. Tired, but awake.
Akaashi couldn't sleep, but it wasn't because of his unfamiliarity with Bokuto that caused this. He couldn't sleep because of his honest fascination with him.
Bokuto would lay still for quite a while, his head tilted to the side with one hand on his stomach, and the other at his side. When he was like this, Akaashi would think that he was resting, and he would almost believe that thought until Bokuto would twitch awake again, his body jerking him from what little relaxation he tried to achieve.
At first, Akaashi thought nothing of it. Bokuto would wince and snap back to reality the way someone would when they dreamt they were falling. But Akaashi knew full well that such a thing wasn't possible with Bokuto's condition. It made Akaashi pity him, to say the least.
Three times, Bokuto jolted awake involuntarily, and three times, he covered his eyes with his forearm and heaved a quiet sigh. Akaashi refused to have reacted to those moments, hoping to spare his visitor the embarrassment of him having seen that. He intended on closing his eyes and falling asleep for real afterwards, but after having felt his mattress shake for the fourth time, he opened his eyes.
Akaashi lifted himself onto his elbows. "Bokuto," he whispered.
Alarmed, he snapped around quickly. His face looked both shocked and exhausted at the same time. "Akaashi? I'm–"
"Don't." His voice a mere murmur, Akaashi moved closer to Bokuto, then resumed to lie down on his back, his head slightly elevated with the pillows that sat behind him. "Don't apologize."
Mildly embarrassed, Bokuto looked away and rubbed his arms.
"Come." Akaashi beckoned for his visitor.
Turning his attention back to him, Bokuto met Akaashi's gaze. He wore a confused expression, wondering just what the other had meant by that word.
"I said come." He motioned for Bokuto to come closer. "Get over here." As Akaashi said this, he held out an arm, as if readying himself for some sort of hug.
Obeying with hesitance, Bokuto shifted towards Akaashi and lay against him, fitting into the curve of his arm. It was no doubt that he was larger than Akaashi, but that didn't stop him from fitting in just right.
Bokuto's head lay against Akaashi's shoulder. Akaashi's arm cautiously wrapped itself around Bokuto's broad shoulders.
Neither of them said a word.
Minutes passed, and in time, Akaashi could feel Bokuto relaxing against him, the signs of fatigue finally wearing him down. His head slumped against his shoulder, and both his hands rested on his stomach. He was trying. Trying so hard to fit in that small amount of sleep that would get him through the next day, and Akaashi wanted to help.
As much as he didn't want to believe it, Akaashi wanted so badly to help.
Why?
Akaashi watched as one of Bokuto's hands twitched involuntarily, and to his dismay, it wouldn't stop. Slowly, he reached a hand out and closed it over the twitching one, his four fingers fitting into Bokuto's palm. In seconds, his hand was calm again.
Akaashi inhaled quietly. He watched as Bokuto's chest rose and fell with each breath that kept him alive. His breathing was controlled, much like one of a person's who was actually asleep. Pursing his lips, Akaashi let his head fall back into the pillows. He turned his head to the side, towards Bokuto's. He could smell his faint scent. He smelled sort of like a hospital.