Better Than My Last

Introduction

Hi

My name is Jazzlyn Simmons. I'm 17 years old, and live in beautiful, sunny Los Angeles, California. Even though where I live is sunny and beautiful, my life is a totally different story. It's perfectly imperfect...

I'm an only child and I live with my mom and my two yorkies, Bella and Zeus. Sometimes it's as if my dogs are the only ones there for me, because my relationship with my mother has its faults. Ever since my father left three years ago, it's never been the same between us two. She was always mad at me and blamed me for him leaving, when in reality it was her fault She's the one who cheated on my dad. Not me. I was [and still am] a true Daddy's gurl and my father loved me and my mom both unconditionally. He left because he lost trust in her but we never lost contact. We still talk every other week when I get the chance. Mostly when my mom isn't around because she would flip if she ever found out. Why though I don't understand. Again it WAS her fault. But at times when when I'm really down, I start to blame myself for how our relationship turned out because in all honesty, I want to mend it somehow, though it seems so impossible. Anyways, since then it's been odd and very stressful being around her and having to deal with the constant bickering between us. I feel so distant from her, it's almost as if she's not even there. I'll always love her because she is my mom, but the relationship we used to share will never be the same.

For a while I was able to deal with my mom by talking to Kyle.

Ah Kyle.....Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. He was my first boyfriend and we shared some good memories together. Sadly though, most of those memories make my stomach ache. It was one of those relationships where he was super over protective and demanding, but there was nothing I could do about it. Because at the same time, he was aggressive. There were times were I tried to stick up for myself, and he didn't like that at all, and he often got physical with me. He was dominate, he was in charge, and he constantly made that know to me. I felt caged in a lot, but at the same time he was my place of refugee on our good days. He held me until I stopped crying about my stressful arguments with my mother. He reminded me that I was still loved and understood by someone. [He had his own issues with his mother too but that's a story for another time] As our relationship continued though, I saw those good days/memories less, and less. Our bitter sweet relationship was making me go crazy. I loved him but I hated him. So I had to end it. The day we broke up was one of the scariest most emotional days for me. I had never seen him so upset before. He was enraged, confused, heartbroken, and stressed all at the same time. Luckily, he didn't lay a hand on me but he did say some things that I'll never forget and that he could never take back. It's been about 3 weeks since our break up and I'm still trying to adjust to not having him around even though I'm glad that I made the decision to end it. (see how messed up this relationship made me!)

The main person helping me through it all is my bestfriend Aliyah. We've been friends since 3rd grade, and she has helped me through all my struggles with my mom, dad, and Kyle. Even though when we first met, i thought she was super weird and i was hecka mean to her sometimes, she still became my friend which is amazing to me. She is my R.O.D and idk what i would do without her. Im surprised that she is purposely putting up with me through this point in my life because its full of the most stressful issues that I've had to deal with EVER. She tries her hardest each and everyday to make me smile and thats what i love about her. To me, her life is perfect, and just the fact that she wants to continue to stick around with a messed up person like me, gives me a reason to wake up every morning and put up with the bull shit that is my everyday life. She is the yin to my yang, the french to my fries, the stars to my sky. She is my other half. And i can go to her for whatever i need.

Then there's him. This new boy. Everything about him is perfect. His smile, his eyes, they way he talks. I couldn't ask for a better person to walk into my life right now. He is like that little ray of sunshine at the end of my dark tunnel. Oh if only I could talk to him...

And so the story begins...

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[ Jazzlyn in the media]

S/N: I hope this little intro helped you get excited for the rest of the chapters. I know its not much rn but its a taste of what to expect in the upcoming chapters :) Chapter 1 coming soon! COMMENT! SHARE! AND ADD TO YOUR LIBRARY!