Left Alone To Cry.

Chapter 1: It's over

NIALL'S POV

 "Niall, I'm sorry but you have to leave the band."

The concert just ended up and Marco, the manager, took me in a corner backstage where anyone can see or hear us.

 At first, I'm sure it's a joke. It can't be real, come on. I laugh and reply:

 "Really funny, no seriously, what did you want to tell me?"

The manager stares into my eyes for a long time, not saying anything. I frown, waiting for his answer.

 "Niall, you don't seem to get it. You have to quit One Direction."

 It's just like a rock falling down in my stomach. I feel my cheeks burn and my knees getting weak. Did I really hear that?

 "You're kidding, right?" I whisper feeling my heart pumping into my chest.

 "I'm serious, Niall." He tells me with a grave tone. "It's been a long time we're thinking about it and we think you're not reflecting the image of the group. Your voice and your appearance are not good enough. Plus, the fans seem attracted over the other boys more than over you. We think One Direction would be better without you. You don't have your place in the celebrity world."

 Three or four knives directly pierce my back. How dare they?

 I worked so hard on my voice since the X-Factor, I've been through all my insecurities, I finally love me for me and now they tell me I'm not good enough. After all my efforts, nothing pays off. 

 "B-but..." is all I can say.

"There's no 'but', Niall. I have your belongings and guitar," Marco says, putting them in my hands. "I want you to leave right now. A cab is waiting for you outside; you'll start a new life."

 Everything is going so fast. I don't want to leave the band! And absolutely not for these reasons! I love what I'm doing so much and the people I met doing this! I don't want it to be taken away like this! The fans, tours, albums.... The boys...

"Can I say goodbye to the boys?" I ask, my voice shaking under the sadness.

"Sadly you can't. They're not aware you're leaving the band. Someone else will take your place. Stay away from them. They'll be upset and disturbed; they won't perform as well as we want them to. If someone asks, YOU decided to quit the band because you couldn't handle being famous and you got sick of Harry, Liam, Louis and Zayn. You'll have to change your appearance too; I don't want Medias to recognize you. Understood?"

"I..."

"Come on, shoo! Your new life is waiting for you!"

 Marco pushes me discretely to the exit door. At the same time, I hear the fans still in the crowd screaming their lungs out.

The tears are falling by themselves on my cheeks. I'm not ready to say goodbye to all of this.

We're finally at the exit door and I look behind me one last time. I can see from the corner of my eye Harry, Liam, Louis and Zayn, all four of them talking and laughing together, not realizing I'll never see them again.

 I'd like to scream, yell, so the boys could save me, they could convince the management to let me stay... but I can't do anything. I'm too weak. I start sobbing when the manager opens the exit door and pushes me out.

 "Have an amazing life." He only says waving his hand at me and automatically closing the door behind him.

 Everythingisdark. I can'thear a thing, I can'tsee a thing.

 I amdistraught. My life just literally slipped through my fingers. I lost it all, all at once. Four of my best mates, I won't ever be able to see them again, because I'm not good enough to be where they are.

 I could've fight to stay, but that would've been pointless. They're probably right, I'm not good enough, and I'll never be. Somebody better than me will take my place...

 My throat is tight and my heart is so big into my chest. The trembling of my body joins my tears and sobs.

 I show my back to the door and see the cab. I look down, sniff, and get in the vehicle.

 It drives off and drives for a long time. I lie down on the back seat and, leaning on my guitar, I cry. I cry for so long that I don't even remember when I wiped away the last tear.