The Introverted Kitten's First Date

Ask, Avarice, And Ameliorate

"Oh my god, you look like a chipmunk right now!"

"A baboon, Tanaka!" Sugawara insists.

"Are you sure he doesn't look like Kageyama when he doesn't drink enough milk?"

Gasps were heard, "Kiyoko-san made fun of someone!"

"All of you, shush," I glare at them, though there's no weight to the glare as I focus back on the call.

"So, what are you talking about?" I ask, though it seems there's no answer.

"Oh, sorry," I hear Kenma speak quietly; it's a nice contrast from the probably constantly sneering tone that Kuroo has, that asshole with his literal existence probably revolving around annoying me. "Kuroo went to the bathroom. I didn't mean to spill that he's interested in Tsukishima. If it's not too much to ask, could you not tell him? It'd just make Kuroo whine and bitch a ton if he's worried about it."

"Uh..." I don't really know how to react. I haven't heard Kozume use any form of what would be considered impolite language before, so that's new. Secondly, the actual confirmation that Kuroo's interested in Tsukishima is weird in itself.

"Sure...you can tell him that yourself."

I hear some noise in the background, Tsukki, are you sick? You keep sneezing!

Nah, it's fine, Yamaguchi. Guess something just came over me.

"Ok..." I can tell there's something on his mind "Sawamura-san? You know how I asked you how to apologize to Shou for having to take care of me while I was sick?"

Oh, great. Some more dating advice from the man not in a relationship.

"Yeah..." I keep going, urging him to spill already.

"I need a bit more advice," he admits. "Do you think the Tokyo Tower would be a good place to date Shou out on a first date? I asked Kuroo and he just resorted to teasing me."

I blink, "Uh. Sure, I guess. Is there anything else you needed?"

"No. Thank you, Sawamura-san."

Okay, I'm definitely glad Hinata's not with someone as crazy as he is. Otherwise it'd be much more difficult to manage.

As I hear the call end, I toss the phone back to Tsukishima, who swiftly catches it.

In an instant, our water break continues with the second and third-years bantering amongst themselves about my appearance, and the first-years excluding Kageyama going back to practice. That's weird. I thought Kageyama would be leaping up and down to get to the court.

~~~

"Iwa-Chan~! Who are you texting?!" Oikawa cheerfully greeted as he slung a shoulder around Iwaizumi, who wasn't expecting the sudden touch and grunted as he braced.

"Kageyama. Apparently he's asking if we're really coming to that volleyball training camp," Iwaizumi shrugged. "I mean, Kuroo from Nekoma wouldn't stop insisting, but it would be a great opportunity to go against some more powerhouse schools. Besides, we'd be going against Karasuno a bunch."

Oikawa cringed at that, a sour expression befitting the stark transition in his mood.

"Ewwww! Iwa-Chan~! Do we really have to?!" Oikawa complained, pouting.

"Stop complaining, Shittykawa. Don't you want to keep practicing?" Iwaizumi responded as he always did when Oikawa acted childish. Switching over to this sort of behavior was practically instinct for the teen who'd dealt with this the past few years.

"Yeah, but why do I have to play with Tobio-chan?! It's not gonna be fun!" Oikawa practically cried, falling onto his good knee. "Do we really have to go?!" In true honesty, he didn't really care about having to play with Kageyama, but rather the lowered stakes. He preferred playing against him where the stakes were highest, and practice matches simply couldn't simulate that sort of life-on-the-line feeling.

Before Iwaizumi can answer his question, Oikawa's phone rang. As it effectively interrupted the emotional downpour being rained onto Iwaizumi, he couldn't help but be grateful to his digital savior.

"Who is it?" He raised an eyebrow, plopping himself onto the bench nearest to the restroom. As he sighed, he felt a little curious, seeing something akin to confusion manifest on Oikawa's face, his countenance all sorts of jumbled up. It was like he was trying to choose his emotion at the time, at least to Iwaizumi.

For Oikawa, he couldn't help but wonder what to feel towards the man calling him. With how little they'd interacted in the past, it was an unknown variable to the setter as to why he'd call him in the first place.

"Uh, hi, this is Oikawa from Aoba Johsai," he introduced himself on speaker, glancing at Iwaizumi every now and then. Why would Kuroo from Nekoma be calling me if he's mainly interacting with Coach?

"Yo, Oikawa, it's me. Got something to ask about you real quick," Kuroo quickly got to the point as he didn't want to fail his task quickly, somewhat catching the setter off guard.

Wow, Oikawa not knowing what to do? That's a first. Maybe Kuroo isn't so bad after all, Iwaizumi mused silently, seeing the new form of confusion setting onto Oikawa's face.

"You remember Chibi-chan? Hinata?" Instantly, annoyance came onto Oikawa as he was quickly reminded of the loss that his team suffered against Hinata and Tobio.

"Yeah...why?" Despite his annoyance, he still held a calm exterior as he continued the conversation, wanting to know where he was leading with this.

"So, there's this kid on Nekoma's team. Second year named Kozume. My best friend," Kuroo explained, and Iwaizumi felt a twinge of impatience.

"Get to it already. What's the connection we're supposed to make?" Iwaizumi interrupted, snatching the phone from Oikawa who made a distressed cry at the sudden theft.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm obfuscating. Lemme be real: Hinata's dating him. In short, I know Oikawa's probably the most experienced when it comes to relationships and I was hoping he could help me encourage Kozume because they haven't even had their first date yet."

"Uh...Iwa-chan, what does obfuscating mean?" Oikawa whispered, somewhat confused.

"Being vague," Kuroo quickly explained, as if it was routine. "Sorry, I'm trying to get out of vocabulary I keep seeing in my textbooks. Anyways, can you help or not?"

"And why would I do that?" Oikawa pointed out. "I have nothing to gain from this, and it's not like I have the best relationship with Hinata in the first place."

"Think about it. Chibi-chan and Kozume are practically obsessed with each other. I'll send you a text that Kageyama sent me asking Kozume to stop texting Hinata because it was interrupting their practice."

"Okay, now I know you're bullshitting me. There's no way that Shrimpy would ever stop practicing to text someone," Oikawa denied, ending the call. However, he was quickly proven wrong as he got a text notification with a picture attached.

Iwaizumi, however, was extremely amused at the scene that played in front of him next. After quickly reading the text thread sent, Oikawa seemed to go through the five stages of grief faster than what seemed humanly possible.

He had never seen Oikawa call someone so frantically to keep the conversation going, insisting that it would be best for Aoba Johsai if he wasn't practicing so they could beat Tobio again.

Unbeknownst to them, Kuroo's plan was working perfectly.

He'd thrown Kenma off his trail with Bokuto, convinced Bokuto and Oikawa to help, and it seemed like Sawamura was already helping Kenma with advice. Luckily, he would be there to help Hinata alongside Bokuto, and it was pretty certain Oikawa would insist on helping Kenma.

There was only one thought in his head as he ended the second call with Oikawa.

Oh yeah. It's all coming together.