Changers

4. A Holy Connection

Luis hailed a cab.

"Burlington Street," he said as he held open the door for me. Of course, of course he was also behaving like a gentleman under any and all circumstances.

The cab driver's head, nestled firmly in a leather golf cap, bobbed up and down in a nod of greeting. The cab pulled away from the curb and started sailing through the Toronto streets.

The open sky above us was dark, no stars in sight, and the city smog smothered up any indication of the larger universe, leaving us to exist in its bright center.

Luis sat far away from me in the backseat. One side of his body was rigidly aligned with the armrest that was unfolded between us. I stared ahead, not daring to interrupt the tense silence. A few minutes passed. I could sense the movement of his chest as he breathed beside me. He was stiff and controlled.

I felt magnetically attracted to him, pulled in. Through the cab windows, the streets were alive with humanity, walking into stores, breathing laughter into loved ones' faces, and exiting office buildings. But inside our cab, all was still.

The cabdriver made a sharp turn and it propelled me into Luis. My thumb caught his hand briefly. I felt my heart stop. Like at the bar, the cab felt electric and touching him shot a current through me.

I was too embarrassed by the sudden moment to look at him directly, but I peeked from the corner of my eye. His eyes were animated. There was also something clouding them, blocking them, like subdued fear.

"Right here is fine," Luis interjected into my stream of thinking. It took me a second to realize that he was speaking to the cab driver.

The car slowed on command and pulled to the side of the road. He handed the cabdriver a crumpled twenty and opened the door. I followed his lead, thanking the driver on the way out.

Luis stood on the sidewalk with his hands in his pockets looking just how he looked like at the frat house. He was watching me get out of the cab.

"Get out of the cab," however, is a very loose phrase. What really happened was: I opened the door, tried to step onto the pavement, and stumbled onto the street as my heel caught in a sewer grate. He grabbed my forearm with his hand.

"You okay?" He asked into my ear, steadying me. Classic. His second classic move of the night.

"First the cab swerve, now this? Who's directing this romcom?" I said lamely.

His hand was touching my arm, the heat radiating into mine. I was sure I was blushing, revealing all my thoughts.

His eyes smiled knowingly into mine. They creased at the sides. His eyes were warm. I wasn't sure how to understand him, but the little creases comforted me. Before I could check back into the conversation, he started to walk.

"Where are we going?"

There weren't many buildings on the street. A faint smell of a cardboard and fries mixture drifted from the diner on the street. Apart from the diner and the coffee shop beside it, which both looked closed for the night, every other building seemed desolate and dark. The entire street seemed cold, bare. A shiver overtook my body.

"What's here?" I continued. Luis hadn't answered my question.

"What's not here?" He smiled back. There was warmth in his eyes once again. I wrapped my coat tighter around my body, protectively.

"What's not here, what's not there? What exists, what doesn't? Is it A, B, or C- "

"None of the above, all of the above?"