𝙇𝙪𝙠𝙚
"Ash, I got a question" I whisper nervously in his neck, my voice coming out muffled
"what's up, babe?" I feel like he has a feeling of what I'm gonna ask him
"Can I kiss you?" I whisper blushing looking into his bright hazel eyes
"yes" he whispers, connecting our lips together immediately like he has been waiting for me to ask him that question since our eyes met, that first day I walked into a room trying to make friends and saw a chestnut, brown-haired guy around a foot shorter than me looking out the window, admiring the greens of trees glowing from the bright sunlight that kids would dare look at for more than five seconds seeing who can last the longest without burnt eyes
"I love you," I say the words for the first time and I'm nervous to hear Ashton's reply
"be my boyfriend" maybe he's joking. I don't want to get my hopes up. Why would he wanna be with me anyway? "really?" I say in disbelief
"be my boyfriend, Luke because I fucking love you," he says it louder and with more confidence. I've never heard Ashton's voice that confident. He's for real, I have a boyfriend
"yes yes, I will" I feel tears of joy running down my eyes when I grab his face kissing him softly and he kisses me back. This is the best feeling ever, my lips have never felt a kiss as good as this one. Ashton's lips are like marshmallows, holy shit. I have a boyfriend
"I love you, I love you, I love you" those words are coming out of my mouth so easily. I never knew I could say those words without overthinking it and 100% mean them, I never thought I'd even have someone to say those words to.
We end up saying I love you's every ten seconds and kissing for what feels like hours. When Ashton excuses himself, I decide to write in my notebook. I grab my light purple notebook and the nearest black pen I could find. My fingers work their way on the paper with noncursive letters. I can't write cursive letters at all.
I've always wondered what true love feels like. How can you even be certain that that's true love? People say true love is when you sit with that someone comfortably in utter silence but I've always thought comfortable silence is overrated or the feeling you will get when you're talking about deep shit with someone at 4 am and stay up all night together? How would it feel to know that someone couldn't live without you or how they'd be excited to sit down with you and ask about every detail in your day or how would it feel to truly believe that this person means those three words? Some people use these words too often and way too easily. Sure they may mean it, but do they? Are they saying this to prove something or maybe they never felt true love so they may not know what does I love you truly mean. The person who was told they're loved is like a victim, that's the way I see it, and the sentence I love you is the crime, the person who said it is the criminal. The jail that they can go to may be passed as guilt because that person feels guilty for saying something they don't truly mean.
After a couple of minutes, Ashton returns asking what I'm writing "what does it feel to feel true love" I mumble
"you could have asked me" he smiles, playing with my curls "why you?" I mumble
"because it feels fucking good when I'm with you and you're my true love, the truest love I've experienced. You've always been here for me, never tried to leave. Thank you for always loving me" he tells me and I feel tears in my eyes. How did I get so lucky?
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this chapter is shit and short, I hate it but okay.
hope you liked it
all the love. <3
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