If I have Nothing (Absinthe Series 5)

Kabanata 12

"Hindi mo ako naiintindihan. You weren't the one being used. I was fooled, R-rhett "

Tumigil siya sa pag-strum ng gitara. "You trust people too much."

"They're my family." I pointed out.

"But you hate them now for knowing the truth?" malamig niyang tanong. Mas lalo ko lamang iniyakap ang sarili at tumango sa kaniya.

"I could hate them. May kalayaan ako para gawin iyon."

"They gave you everything. Wala ka ngayon dito kung hindi dahil sa kanila. What they did was wrong but could you really hate them?" he asked emphasizing certain words.

Kinagat ko ang labi dahil sa kaniyang tanong. Bumaba ang tingin ko sa kaniyang kamay na tumigil na sa pags-strum. Nabitin iyon sa ere at bigla na lang bumaba sa kaniyang hita.

"Other than Bo's inheritance, you can get yours, too. You have a share, that's what the agreement says."

"They could have told me before." paos na anas ko at naalala na naman ang kanina.

Rhett chuckled lowly. "Flower, if they had told you about it when you were young, would you even understand? You're 17 now and this is what you did. You ran away. What could have you done if you were five and they told you about this?"

I wanted to disagree but Rhett has a point. Siguro kung bata pa lang ako at sinabi nila, magmamaang-maangan lang akong may alam. Sasagot ako ng oo. Walang silbi kung sinabi nila sa akin dahil bata pa ako at hindi ko pa iyon masyadong maiintindihan.

"They love you, you should know that. Tita Agatha was hesitating whether to tell you or not because she was afraid you might hate them. You see, flower, you weren't smart at all. All you think about is yourself. All you think about is that they betrayed you. But they badly wanted you from the start even if it means that your existence in that family was because of an agreement."

Ayaw kong maniwala kay Rhett. Ayaw ko siyang pakinggan but it would look like I was immature and hardheaded. Tama siya.

Bakit ba palagi siyang tama? Bakit ba hindi ko magawang isipin kung ano ang tama?

"I'll be marrying you once you turned eighteen. That's the agreement." Napatingin ako sa kaniya, awang ang labi. My chest constricted at the unknown feeling that was invading my system.

Umihip ang hangin. I hugged myself more when I saw how his eyes raked my sitting figure. His eyes darkened and there was a tint of anger in his eyes.

"Happy birthday," he suddenly said. Tumingala siya sa langit bago gumalaw ang kaniyang kamay para sa isang malamyos na tono ng musika.

He was humming to the song while I listened and watched him. Nakapikit na siya. His skillful fingers skimmed through the strings, jumping from one to another.

Kung sana ganito lang kapayapa parati ang pagitan namin ni Rhett ay magugustuhan ko. No words were said between us but it was calming. The music that he was playing was calming my confused and raging heart.

Huminga ako nang malalim at tumitig sa kaniyang mapayapang mukha. His strong Russian features wasn't the one to go unnoticed. His grayish silver eyes were deep, sharp and cold. It was complimented by his thick brows and long lashes. His Roman nose stood high and proud. Ang manipis na labi ay bahagyang nakaawang habang nakatingala. Bumaba ang tingin ko sa kaniyang maputing leeg. His Adam's apple, moved up and down as he swallowed. Gumalaw ang kaniyang perpektong panga.

Nagmulat siya ng mga mata at ibinaba ang ulo para matingnan ako. My eyes widened a fraction when he caught me staring at him.

"Feeling better now?" he asked after a while. The question was supposed to make me feel better but his voice was somehow cold and husky that it sent shivers to my spine. Dahan-dahan akong tumango at inilapag ang kamay sa buhangin. Gumilid ang nakasarado kong mga binti at lumapag din sa buhangin.