Shadows of the World » Band of Brothers

41: Secrets Weary

"Thirty-first of May, isn't it?" Jules wondered, and he nodded. "So they shouldn't find out until at least around the twenty-sixth I would've thought. They've got plenty of time yet."

"We'll probably be sent out again before then." When she tilted her head inquisitively at him he shrugged. "As we get nearer to the invasion the Allies'll want to really make sure the Germans are focusing their artillery on Calais. Plus, Hitler's still building his Atlantic Wall, so I reckon we could be sent out to destroy parts of it."

Juliette nodded her understanding. "They'll be reluctant to send us back undercover for a while, so that makes sense."

A stagnant pause fell over the pair, and indeed there seemed to be more of those in the air recently than ever before - almost as though they were leaving the space blank for input from another party - before Jules felt Tom's calculating gaze on her. She met his eyes with raised eyebrows and he frowned.

"Have you eaten yet today?" Jules rolled her eyes and went to reply before he added, "Don't lie to me."

That stopped her in place. She looked away. He was always the most difficult to lie to.

Tom sighed. "You have to eat, Jules."

Juliette began to chew on her bottom lip. "I know," she admitted quietly. "It's not that I'm purposely not eating, it's just - the thought of eating anything makes me want to be sick." She met his eyes hesitantly and frowned when she saw his disapproval.

Tom maintained eye contact vigilantly for a few moments before murmuring, "He wouldn't want you to make yourself suffer."

Jules' heart wrenched, as it always did when someone brought up Alex, and she could see the despair she felt mirrored in Tom's eyes. "I'm not doing it deliberately," she promised. She shook her head as she searched for the words to explain to him what was going on. "I just - I just can't, Tom. I don't know why, I just can't."

Tom nodded and ran a hand through his hair, running his tongue over his bottom lip before entreating, "Will you at least try? For me?" After noticing her conflicted expression he rushed to add, "Just something small."

Jules sighed. She really wanted to do it for him, if only just to make him stop worrying, but her reluctance to eat wasn't out of choice. "I don't know -"

"I'll tell Eugene on you," he threatened.

She stilled. "You wouldn't."

His eyes glinted in challenge. "Try me."

Jules breathed out a laugh. "Fine, I yield. I'll try. But if I throw up all over you that's on you."

"Literally," he replied, and she giggled.

When the pair of them descended the stairs to make their way to the kitchen, Will was scrubbing the table. Jules' eyes saddened when they fell on him. She sent him a small smile as he glanced up, but she tried not to let her gaze linger too long; they all coped differently, and if meticulously cleaning everything to acquire a sense of routine was what Will needed to feel better then who was she to deny him that?

She did wonder, distantly, whether they would need to collectively intervene at some point lest he make it a habit that goes on forever, or whether his preoccupation would calm with time. But she figured that that was a question for another day, and one to ask when Will wasn't present. She hated people fussing over her and figured that if she wouldn't appreciate it then he probably wouldn't either.

Jules hopped up on one of the kitchen counters, not wanting to sit at the table and risk disturbing Will in his work. She let Thomas peruse the cupboards in pursuit of something that wouldn't make her want to vomit.