Criminal Minds Preferences/One-Shots

What Type of Drunk She Is

A/N: I searched up at least 40 different types of drunk girls, and I decided on which type of drunk your S.O. would be. I don't own Criminal Minds.

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Jennifer 'JJ' Jareau

The Dancing Machine

It's all fun and games until this girl shows up on the dance floor. You're having a great time re-enacting the Napoleon Dynamite dance with your friends, then this girl clears the way and starts doing sexy pirouettes. She drops it so low you start to question if she'll even make it back up.

Emily Prentiss

The Drunk Dialer

All seven of your Saturday morning voicemails are always from this girl. Most of them are of her thinking she is actually having a conversation with you. "You are the best friend ever. Like literally ever. You are so perfect, I just want to make out with your face." Without these girls, how would we know that we have friends who love us at 2:30 in the morning?

Penelope Garcia

The Super Sexual One

Whiskey, vodka, beer, wine, rum, tequila... it all makes her frisky. She's the one who runs into her biology TA at the bar and climbs on his lap, bragging about how "flexible" she is and that she would love to show him sometime. The worst part is that the poor girl is always mortified the next morning.

Tara Lewis

The Over-Emotional One

Everything that comes out of her mouth usually starts with "I just," "I feel," "I need" or "I want," which is followed by something ludicrous that happened five years ago. "I just feel like you hate me ever since I barfed in your purse junior year." She finds something to cry about every time you go out, her smoky eye makeup streaming down her face like wet paint.