FORCE | topper thornton

EIGHTEEN

Topper flew out of the car as soon as I parked it, I knew how he was feeling, I knew the rush he was feeling so I didn't bother to stop him, instead I just followed him, barely having a chance to lock the car as he was running so fast. Finally though, I caught up to him as he approached the desk in the emergency room, "my mom, Cynthia Thornton was just brought in." He panted out and the nurse quickly typed the name into the computer, she frowned, "you can't go back just yet, they're still working on her." She explained, looking to me for help as Topper looked like he was going to fall over. "Please, just let us know as soon as we can see her." I spoke softly to the nurse, she nodded, typing something else before I escorted Topper to the chairs. "Kenzie, what if she-" "Baby, you can't think like that, okay? Just take a deep breath." I spoke softly as I took a deep breath along with him, seeing the way his hands and legs were shaking in the seat. I cupped his face, forcing him to meet my eyes, I did my best to hide the emotion in mine. "Breath, good job sweetheart." I soothed, I hardly ever use the name on him, mostly in situations like this, when he is becoming uncontrollable. "For Cynthia Thornton?" We shot up as the voice rang out, I could tell when I saw the hospital chaplain waiting in the next room that the news wasn't good, Topper didn't notice as he dragged us to the nurse who called for us. She motioned to the room the chaplain was in, it was a good gesture, that they brought him in, but Topper wasn't really religious, so I knew I was going to have to politely ask him to leave. "Why is he here?" Were the first words out of Topper's mouth when he read the name tag on the chaplains chest. I took a shaky breath as the nurse began to speak, "your mother suffered a severe heart attack, they were unable to revive her, her heart was too damaged." She spoke in a very monotone voice, it felt cold but I knew that even if she had used emotion, it wouldn't have made the news any easier to hear.

And just like all the times Topper cradled me as I cried, I did for him now as he sunk to his knees. I felt a hand on my shoulder, I glanced up and saw the chaplain looking down upon us. "Would you like me to say a prayer for her?" Topper didn't budge, he probably hadn't even heard the words. I took it upon myself, "he's not the most religious, but could you please say a silent prayer for both of them." I whispered, not wanting to upset Topper more, I wasn't that religious either, but I did believe that this couldn't hurt the situation, it felt wrong to decline the service. He nodded, standing to his full height, I watched as he closed his eyes, his lips moved but I heard no words. I put my attention back to Topper who was soaking my shirt that was already still damp from the pool. "I'm sorry for your loss, if you'd like anything else, don't hesitate to ask for me." I gave the chaplain a soft, tearful nod as he walked out, leaving us to grieve privately. "Would you like to see her?" The nurse asked, gently placing a hand on Topper's shoulder, I looked to him for an answer, he shakily nodded, standing to his feet. I followed his actions, gripping his hand tightly, reassuring him that I was here beside him, the whole way. The continuous heartache we couldn't escape. My mind began to race with all sorts of thoughts, he's going to have to plan a funeral, was he on any of the property? Her life insurance? I know he had only just turned eighteen, but I hoped that she added him to everything. Instantly I said a silent prayer that he was, this would make it much easier, and of course I would help him with all of it, unfortunately having been through the process twice already, I could do this for him easily, which was a painful thing to think.

"I'll give you some privacy, when you're ready to discuss the next steps, let me know and I'll get a social worker." The nurse spoke, directing it more towards me as I was the one with the level head. I gave her a quick nod, looking to Topper as he slowly entered the room, there was a small hall when he walked in, so thankfully he didn't see her right away. "Baby," I gently pulled him to a stop, "I want you to know she doesn't want you to remember her this way, okay? She's not going to look like herself." I remember the sight of my mother when she passed, wires attached all over, her skin already graying. I shivered at the thought, pushing it aside as Topper nodded down at me. "I know." His voice was hoarse, and all I could do for the next thirty minutes was hold back tears as I watched the love of my life cry over his mother's body, begging her to come back.

a/n short chapter, I'll try and make the next one long, this is turning into a very depressing story whoops