Raised Mateless (On Hold)

Chapter 4

Harper West -

"Dakota, you march right back up those stairs, mister, and change into your nice clothes. Please.” The stern edging to my voice was enough to show how serious I was, and to send a little boy racing up the stairs to his room.

“Harp, it’s a neighbour barbeque, I don’t think he needs a suit and tie.” Vanessa scoffed, rolling her eyes at me.

I simply shrugged in return; just because it’s a small gathering doesn’t mean my son can show up wearing his Batman pajamas. Even if I don’t live a pack lifestyle, I still want Dakota to look respectable when he’s seen in public – he’s the son of an Alpha after all. “But you do need to wear a dress and heels – but don’t you dare wear that black dress that Victoria Beckam would envy.”

Vanessa let out a very unattractive snort, and stuck out in her tongue in a childish way. “It’s not even that short!”

“Nessie, you can see your ass when you wear it.”

“This is true – fine, no club dress.” Her exasperated sigh made me chuckle, she was still so naive about herself.

Vanessa had the whole world at her feet since the day she learned to bat those devastating lashes covering her eyes. If only she knew her potential past her good looks, and innocent charm, she wouldn’t have to try another day in her life.

My father had always said his daughters were ying and yang, and he pitied the person that would attempt to separate them. In the last few years I could see what he meant, she was the push I needed and I was her rock. It wasn’t until I lost Ryan that I realized she had more in her life than she thought.

“I'm ready, momma!” Dakota tumbled down the stairs with a smile of triumph on his face.

He looked adorable with his hair still ruffled from the morning playing with the neighbour’s dog. Finally changing out of his grimy clothes, and into a cheery green dress shirt and his dark jeans – for a little boy he matched colours almost too well. Dakota looked better than me half the time.

Vanessa appeared in her casual, well casual to her, black pencil skirt and ruffled red blouse. “Got you, little monster,” Dakota giggled as she snatched him up and carried him off to the car out front. I silently followed behind.

I couldn’t help flinch when I heard the word monster, that’s what we were. Monsters. Every time I shift, any of us shift, I can’t remember what my wolf does or what happened or even how many days it’s been before I shift back. You lose yourself, and every word to describe yourself goes out the window. You’re not human anymore. The pain you feel during shifts and when you wake up is the only way to know you’re the monster. I could blame Kai, but the end she was a part of me, it was all on me. 

The first time I ever shifted felt like being set on fire, but I couldn’t see the flames. The screams that rippled through my throat were burned into my memory, as the day I became something no one would love. Ryan changed that for me, he showed me I could be someone’s everything, but once was luck. Now my luck is gone, and I won’t let this life corrupt Dakota.

Someone coughed, clearing their throat beside me. I turned to see Vanessa giving me a look judging my average intelligence, or knowing her she was surprised I had any intelligence. “Harper, I’ve called your name at least ten times since we left, and now we’ve just been sitting in a parked car at the curb for five minutes.” 

“What – Oh.” I glanced around at my surroundings, seeing we were in fact in front of what I assumed was Shane’s house. The rustic house made of brown and beige bricks, and the white trimmed windows looked warm and inviting.