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✯ ┊ my future husband 💅 how was your birthday?
dumbass ┊ ✯ omg u texted me first!!
guess birthday wishes do come true :,)
but anyway it was fine
nothing too big
just some illegal activities 😋
✯ ┊ my future husband 💅 really?
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the blond sighed in exasperation. sure, teens did dumb things all the time, but was y/n dumb enough to fess up to doing illegal things? he didn't know her well, if at all, but he didn't doubt it.
y/n, on the other hand, was not kidding. she got wasted and even went as far as snorting a line of coke off a stripper's ass. it was something straight out of a movie. shalnark wasn't too happy about it, but he didn't let her snort coke off his ass, so she had to go with the next best thing.
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dumbass ┊ ✯ um def not
i would never do anything illegal 😡
a close friend of mine is a devout catholic and he would never allow such things to occur when he's there
i'm an angel 😌
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chrollo was the "devout catholic" in question. if he cared about her doing illegal things, then he wouldn't have given her the coke to begin with.
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✯ ┊ my future husband 💅 that's believable.
dumbass ┊ ✯ of course it is 🙈
have i ever said anything to make you think otherwise kurapika?????
✯ ┊ my future husband 💅 yes.
dumbass ┊ ✯ like what????
✯ ┊ my future husband 💅 our first actual conversation involved premarital sex acts and you proceeded to say that you sold drugs with a friend right after.
dumbass ┊ ✯ bruh you didn't have to call me out smh 😔
and there's nothing wrong with premarital sex 🥴
✯ ┊ my future husband 💅 i didn't say there was.
dumbass ┊ ✯ kinda implied it but um not the point
if we ever meet im gonna premarital sex tf outta you 🥰
only with your consent of course
✯ ┊ my future husband 💅 i appreciate the fact that you'd ask for my consent.
you don't know what i look like so how do you know if you would want to "premarital sex tf outta me" as you so vulgarly put it?
and what about your friend?
i don't think he would like that very much.
dumbass ┊ ✯ ofc always count on me to ask for consent!
and idk i just feel like somewhere deep in my gut... ur hot
speaking of guts there's no doubt you'll be in mine eventually 😌
plus shal isn't anything to worry about because he isn't the boss of me
but why'd you bring him up???
are you......
jeoulse????????
omg how cute!!!!
my future husband 💅 has changed dumbass' contact name to delusional dumbass!
✯ ┊ my future husband 💅 i don't think that's how you spell it.
but jesus christ you are so forward.
delusional dumbass ┊ ✯ it's a meme sir 👁👄👁
& yes i am
&& ummmm lets not ignore the fact that you didn't deny anything!!!
ur gonna have my kids
(with ur consent)
delusional dumbass has changed my future husband 💅's contact name to future baby daddy 🥵!
✯ ┊ future baby daddy 🥵 if i deny it you're just going to ignore everything i say.
delusional dumbass ┊ ✯ totally not true luv
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y/n set her phone down on the kitchen counter and went to the bathroom for a quick break. shalnark didn't want to look, but seeing the contact name pop up on the screen filled him with curiosity. "'future baby daddy'?" he asked himself quietly. "who the hell is that?"
as far as shalnark was aware, y/n didn't have a boyfriend because she liked him. her little crush on him was painfully obvious to everyone in the phantom troupe, even the ones that lacked emotional intellect.
before he could type in her password to read through their messages, she came back.
"what are you doing with my phone?" she asked.
"i didn't know you had a boyfriend."
she blushed, rushing over to try and get her phone. he used his height to his advantage and held it above their heads and out of her reach. "don't tell me you're jealous, shal."
he pouted childishly and y/n felt her heart skip a beat. "is there a reason i should be?"
"no, but—"
"exactly!" he shoved her phone into her chest and she barely had a chance to catch it before it fell. "no one can take you away from me, y/n."
she found herself nodding. "y-yeah."
he pulled her into a hug and she hesitantly wrapped her arms around him. y/n wondered if kurapika was possessive the same way shalnark was.
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delusional dumbass has changed future baby daddy 🥵's contact name to kurapika!
