Why Does it Matter?

Chapter 25: Force

When I reach the main branch of Glamour sa may Ortigas ay naabutan kong nagreready na ang mga tao doon. The staff is busy and when they found me walking towards them ay nakita kong mas lalo silang nag-panic. The warmth in me creeps towards my chest ng makitang hindi lamang ako ang nag-effort for the sake of Glamour, these people too. And I want to thank them later on after this event.

Ang vibrant red colors ng shop ay decorated now with specialized bouquet of roses in five colors and two neutral ones for set of this series. Pink, yellow, green, blue, violet, white and black.

"Kamusta kayo rito?" I ask at lumapit sa head ng marketing team ng mamataan siyang nagmamando ng iilang personnel doon. I smiled at her nervous face ng makita ako.

"Madam! Ang aga niyo naman!" Balik niyang sabi sa akin nab akas ang kaba sa tono niya. She's sweating at ang adrenalin sa kanya ay kitang-kita ko.

"Just, Calm dow. I'm just here to be ready. May maitutulong ba ako?" maagap ko namang tanong sa kanya habang siya ay natataranta pa rin.

"Naku, Madam! Patapos na ho kami! Just some retouches and were good for the press. The personalities that we invited are already here. Nandoon po sila sa loob." She said and gesture me to enter the shop. Kaya naman tumango ako sa kanya bago magpaalam at tinahak ang daan papunta sa loob ng boutique.

Andoon na ang pitong celebrities and high-profile people na kinuha nila I can't even imagine how they persuaded this people dahil bigatin ang mga ito sa larangan ng showbiz and corporate business! Grabe! Hands down for our marketing department.

I greeted some of them, lalo pa't nakilala agad nila ako bilang may-ari. I even recognize the one in pink as one of the angles of a famous lingerie brand! Ung isa ay isang sikat na actor in the showbiz industry with his matte black suit, I know she's known for his god-like name. I smiled at him and seeing him wink at me make flush a bit in my insides dahil sobrang gwapo rin naman talaga niya.

"You really are stupid aren't you?" nagulat naman ako ng marinig ang malditang boses na iyon. A small smirk formed in my lips ng makita ko siya. In a very sexy tight hugging body dress paired with a black beret hat na mas lalong pinatingkad ang kagandahan niya, I smile at her ng makita na rin siyang kumislap ang mga mata sa akin.

Her hug is warm like my mother's hug. Namiss ko tuloy sina mama na hindi makakapunta ngayon dahil nasa ibang bansa gawa ng trabaho kasama si papa.

"I don't remember inviting you here, madame." I stated and gave out my most famous smirk at ang guhit ng irita sa mukha niya ang mas lalong nagpabunyi sa kaloblooban ko.

"You stupid bobita talaga. I don't need an invitation to be here! I'm needed here." Sa presko ng pagkakasabi niya ay baka hanginin na ako. I look again at her at kitang-kita na kahit sa katandaan ay sobrang lakas pa rin ng aura na dala niya that even the stars inside my boutique now are all looking at her habang siya ay parang modelong nakatayo roon at nililibot ang tingin sa buong shop.

"You should send me this new series of yours. I like the old one though. Since you're my daughter-in-law, can you personalized a perfume for me." Napataas naman ang isang kilay ko sa request niya and her elegant laugh filled the room lalo pa ng ma-realize ang sinabi niya.

"I know you can't turn me down, though my daughter is plain stupid, I can't say sorry about that. Mana siya sa kanyang ama." Ang alat sa boses niya dahil sa sinabi ay hindi nakatakas sa pandinig ko but even before I can recognize something in her delicate eyes ay itinapat niya na sa mukha ko ang isang bag ng mamahaling clothing line.

"Here, a congratulatory gift for your success... I'm still rooting for you for my daughter. Kung hindi ikaw ang dahilan ng pagiging ganun niya, she better straight up her path because I'll ruin her life again." Ang pagbabanta sa boses niya ang nagpairap naman sa akin.
Excuse me, but your daughter is making my life into a coaster ride, so no thanks lalo pa't hindi ko na kinaya ang biglaang hindi na naman niya pagkausap sa akin. I'm looking like a fool here.

"Mrs. Montevedra! You're here! Could we interview you for a bit! Also with the head of the Glamour! Of course!" Kahit pa gusto kong ismiran iyong media na gustong i-cover ang nanay ni Ven at kunwari lamang na dinamay ako out of respect ay pinaunlakan ko na lamang ang kanilang gusto.

After a few minutes, we started the opening. I didn't expect that a lot of reports and media personality will be coming today and it is a good venture for the boutique! Especially sa product. Some of the samples are highly praised especially those that fit their personality ay nakuha agad ang puso nila. I was smiling giggly about all the compliments and all I could say is how grateful they are because of this. It's so perfect na panandalian kong nakalimutan ang mapait na nararamdaman ko ng mga nakaraang araw.

Habang sumisimsim sa wine flute ko at nakikipagkwentuhan sa ina ni Ven ay nagbabalik sa akin kung paano nga ba siya naging malapit sa buhay ko. She would occasionally send me gifts and she is one of the investor of Glamour, kalaunan ay ibinenta niya rin sa akin ang shares niya so I'll own almost half of the company na sobrang ikinatuwa ko naman.

"No! Let me through! I'll talk to the owner of this stupid boutique! How dare you?!" Naglingunan kaming lahat dahil sa lakas ng boses na iyon.

Alliyah, the head of the marketing team, is stopping someone from getting inside the boutique. Hindi ako nagdalawang isip na lapitan sila dahil sa komosyon na nabubuo dahil doon.

Napapitlag ako when I see Bea on the entrance, verge of lashing out.

"Get off me! I need to talk to the owner of this shop! Their marketing department went to me then after a few days, babawiin nila ang offer! How dare this stupid people!" nagulat ako sa sinabi niya. I look at Alliyah na ngayon ay nakatingin na rin sa akin habang ang isang security guard ay lumapit na para pigilan siyang magpumiglas.

Ang mahaba at pinong itim na buhok ay sumabog na sa mukha niya habang namumula siya sa galit. Alliyah don't even know what to do habang nahihiyang sinisilip ako.

"Get-off me! You—"

"Bitawan niyo na siya." The coldness in my voice remains in the air as they all heard it from me. Si Alliyah ay parang nag-aalinlangan pang gawin iyon pero kalaunan ay binitawan rin si Bea.

I walk towards them, rinig ang tunog ng stiletto sa marmol na sahig as Bea's face is lace with shock and confusion habang naglalakad ako papalapit sa kanya.

"What the fuck are you doing here—"

"You said you want to talk to the owner, andito na ako. Now what?" Ang iritasyon sa boses ko ay rinig na rinig. I can sense that the people are now looking habang ang isang media personel ay abang na abang sa maaring mangyari.

"Huh?! Are you fooling me around?! This bitch is your boss?" Hindi makapaniwala niyang tanong. She even pointed me and hysterically look at Alliyah na nasa gilid ko na at mabilis naman itong tumango.

Nakita ko pang sinuklay niya ang buhok niya para maayos na makita ko ang mukha niya. She remains in her height while I grew taller on her. Tinaasan niya pa ako ng kilay bago suyurin ang kabuuan ko. She's in a tight hugging dress too, mas maiksi kumpara sa karaniwan, partnered with a high-end stiletto with six-inches heels.

"I want you to fire her! She can't handle her job properly!" Taas noo niyang sabi sabay ng pagkrukrus ng kamay sa dibdib habang tinitignan ako ng may panliliit na mata.

"Ano nga ulit ang ginawa niya for you to shamelessly drag yourself here?" Puno ng pang-uuyam ang tanong ko. Narinig ko pa ang mahinang halakhak mula sa ina ni Ven and in one second only, her face changes, now it is wash with full irritation and madness and is about to erupt on me.

"Your damn head of marketing contacted me to endorse one of those damn perfume! Tapos sasabihin na may nakuha na raw sila a few days later! Are they playing with me?!" I roll my eyes in pure irritation ng marinig ko kung gaano kababaw ang rason niya para ipahiya ang sarili ng ganito.

Indeed, not all pretty face has a brain inside. Masyado siyang nasobrahan sa ganda at kinulang sa utak.

"Ow, baby. Did we hurt your ego?" Wala sa sariling asar ko and for the first time, I feel satisfied because of her red face, galit na galit.

"You bitch! Sinadya mo iyon ano?! Just to get your sweet revenge on me!"  I was taken back ng sabihin niya iyon. She even takes a step forward to me at tinitigan ako sa mata. Bakas ang pamatay na ekspresyon sa maganda niyang mukha pero hindi na niya ako matitinag ngayon.

"Just because your girlfriend fucked me before, you plot this stupid revenge on me para mapahiya ako! My friends are expecting me in this venture and now? You ruined it." Nalaglag ang panga ko sa sinabi niya. The audacity of this girl is beyond heaven reach!

Bakit parang proud pa siyang may nangyari sa kanila ni Ven behind my back like it is the biggest trophy of her life! I couldn't believe she will be this low!

Hindi lang utak ang wala siya pati common sense! Wala rin! I will surely donate a great amount of money for her brain recovery! Nakakaawa siya! Her neurons must be exhausted because of her stupidity, they couldn't take it and give up. Nakakaawa naman ang utak niya, it's place wronged on her body, baka nasa talampakan niya iyon!

"Um... It's not my fault if there is someone better than you, hindi mo naman ako kasing babaw para mag-aksaya pa ako ng panahon sayo." I said refraining myself from drowning on my thoughts. Sinilip ng aking mata ang ina ni Ven and her familiar devilish face is now resurfacing while Bea is still not done with her range.

"Someone better than me? Excuse me? Even Iyssa left you because of me! Hindi niya kasi kaya iyong committed masyado! She couldn't take someone who is such a dependent in the relationship! You're probably clingy and such an attention seeker! She likes it mature, occasionally lamang nanghihingi ng oras sa kanya, not only sexually but also emotionally." My head hurts as I couldn't take her logic anymore, grabe.Ido-donate ko na ang kalahati ng utak ko sa kanya.

I look at her with fire in my eyes, habang naglalaro pa sa utak ko ang sinabi niya. So they occasionally have sex. Wow, Iyssa Veriane.

Ang mukha niya na ngayon ay nakatutok sa akin, puno ng pagmamalaki. A small smile creeps on my lips habang iniilingan pa siya.

"Are you saying you're having casual sex with Iyssa Veriane?" paninigurado ko pa, sa tunog ng pang-uuyam at pagkadisgusto habang pinipigilan ang puso kong mabasag sa sagot niya. 

"Yes, she likes it casual. No string attached. Sorry, did I break your heart?" pang-aasar niya pa. I control my face to hold the disgust in me kahit may parte sa akin na gustong magwala. Gustong tanggaling ang buhok niya sa bunbunan niya.

Cheap fights are not worth my hormones, they are a very big waste of my adrenaline and endorphins. Sayang lang kaya huwag na.

"Oh, no baby. You just announce it to the world that you're a side chick. Aside from being pretty, you also prove them you don't have the brains and to that conclusion, people will only come for you just to bed you. Nothing more, nothing less. Pangkama ka lang ba, Bea?" I whisper softly to her at ang pagbabago sa ekspresyon ng mukha niya ang nagdikta na panalo ako. I look at her ashamed face, mukhang nakita na ang media sa gilid na isinusulat ang bawat sasabihin niya. Too bad she's a known athlete pero napaka basura ng ugali niya.

"And oh, go fuck whoever you want. Huwag ka lang magkalat sa boutique ko, okay? I don't pay thousand just so someone could sweep you away. Sayang ang pera ko." Saad ko at tinalikuran na siya.

The victorious smile is plastered on Mrs. Montevedra's face pero agad ko iyong iniwasan ng bumalik ang sinabi ni Bea kanina. Parang sirangp plaka iyon na paulit-ulit na naririnig ko sa isip ko.

I remember my young heart only distinguishing between love and hate back then. I couldn't hate Ven so I love her hard enough to make a fool of myself. How stupid of me now to even think na sana ganoon na lamang ulit ang nararamdaman ko. Na sana I can only classified things that way, unlike now. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang uunahing damhin.
Galit. Poot. Kahihiyan. Sakit.

I don't know...

It is not the people around me that have faults on my situation now, lalo pa't ako naman ang tumuwid para makamtam ang ekspektasyon nila sa akin but now, looking back at all the things I have surrendered to Ven only to find out that she's still having sex with the mere girl who had broken my trust years ago! Damn it!

I feel so betrayed to the point of not giving a damn anymore! Tangina!

Namumutawi ang sakit sa akin habang dere-deretso akong pumapasok ng comfort room.

The only thing running in my mind right now is that I'm extremely mad.

Galit na galit ang puso ko habang tinitignan ang sarili sa salamin. Walang bakas ng luha pero punong-puno ng hinanakit ang mga mata ko.

Never knowing, until now. That I give her once again, everything that I have ng pumunta kami sa isla na iyon.

My heart, soul and body. Every virtue you could name. I give it all unconsciously but willingly.

And I hate it dahil wala akong ibang masisi kundi sarili ko because I gave in. Nagpadala na naman ako sa puso ko without my brain. How hypocrite of me to ask drag Bea's thinking capacity, e mukhang yung akin rin ay hindi nagana.

Damang-dama ko ang mahigpit na pagliit ng espasyo sa dibdib ko dahil sa sakit. Force is making me hard to breath along with the silent cries that I made habang madiing kinakagat ang pam-ibabang labi, ironically with no tears but my whole heart is crying.

It's like a force from the past has magically in front of me now. At hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko dahil unti-unti akong inuubos ng pwersang iyon.

Until all I could feel is emptiness.