playing nice | park seonghwa

chapter five

- warnings: mild description of a panic attack

...

You exited the cupboard immediately overwhelmed by the sheer amount of people. They were talking and laughing loudly, music was playing, kids were running around squealing.

Everything felt too loud.

You took shaky steps forward, making your way towards the front door. Everyone felt too close, bumping into you as you tried to exit the building. They would try touching you as they apologised, only making your rising panic quicken. You felt trapped. The room was far too hot. It was so suffocating. Panic inducing. Everything was too much. Too much. Too much toomuchtoomuchtoo-

"Hey," you jumped, clutching your chest, your heart beating erratically, "Woah, woah, woah, calm down. What's wrong?" San looked worried as he noticed your wide eyes and shaking form.

You shook your head, unconsciously fidgeting with your necklace, "Nothing, nothing's up. I just uhh," your eyes darted around the room to no avail, he wasn't here, "I need air, just need air," you gestured towards the door.

He looked unconvinced but smiled warmly regardless, "I'll join you, wouldn't want a bear to attack you or anything," he was already walking to the coat rack before you could decline and you had a feeling he wasn't about to take no for an answer on this.

The snow was falling harder than it had been for the past few days and it was significantly colder outside. The harsh weather was welcomed though, it made your body feel cold for a reason beyond your own stupidity.

You walked in tandem towards the lake, both of you consumed in your own thoughts, "Sooo," San broke the silence, "You wanna talk about why I saw a guy exiting the same cupboard as you?"

You deeply inhaled the cold air, allowing it to calm your senses, "That's Seonghwa,"

"Ahh the boyfriend," you cringed at the title and he noticed, "Not the boyfriend?"

You shook your head, "Fake boyfriend, very long story. Although now I guess he's kinda my ex-fake boyfriend,"

"Sounds complicated," you nodded, "Do you frequent cupboards with ex-fake boyfriends often?"

You laughed, the sound felt foreign to you, "Not very often no, we had some things we needed to talk about in private,"

He nodded his head, "Hmm I see, makes perfect sense. I too choose damp and dimly lit cupboards to talk with my ex fake boyfriends," his tone was playful and he made you laugh again.

You both turned and looked behind you at the sound of fast-approaching footsteps, "Wait up slowpokes," Jongho was jogging up to the two of you, a snowball in hand.

"Jongho, don't you dare-" you were cut off with a shriek, the cold impact against your cheek shocking you.

San burst into laughter, clutching his stomach and almost falling over. Jongho was just as content with himself, wiping away tears as he laughed.

You bent down and scooped up snow, hurtling it at San, aimed perfectly at his neck. You smiled widely, watching him yelp and jump around as the snow trickled down his back. He looked up at you with a smirk, "Oh, this means war,"

The three of you ran around the old campgrounds, your laughter and exuberant shouts caught the attention of the other patrons within the main building. Children you had never seen before tugged on their parents' hands and begged them to join in, breaking into huge smiles when they were granted permission. Lou and James ran up to you alongside them, already flinging snow at each other and laughing loudly.