"The X-Advisors..."

"The X-Advisors..." Part XVI...

"So the 'Creator' became reality..." Amy eyed him shrewdly.

"Not as selfishly as the rep goes, I hope...At least not after seeing the same pain in a woman's face I'd felt when Leonard Horowitz returned in Fall 1960, Mr, Dr. Fowler-Horowitz, I did limit myself to women I did care for. I think, despite the legends, most of them would agree, we usually parted friends and the parting often not at my instigation...It was the 60s, after all." Shrug, wry grin...

"And Susan was the product of one of your campaigns?" hard stare...

"An accident in the 'creator''s career, you mean...?" wry smile. "No...Susan was anything but an accident. She was a blessing. But one that came with a price."

"But what caused Dr. Francis to...Oh..." Amy stared.

"Margaret..." she eyed him. "Margaret is Susan's mother...Isn't she?"

Horrifying infinitely long fantasy of Penny with beautiful baby in arms in hospital bed, looking sheepish if radiant...Awkward Sheldon, trying to explain to her and Leonard...

"Come, Amy..." Leonard, looking away from Penny's pleas for forgiveness...

How could one resist the allure of the Cooper...All those years, only just across the hallway...

"...let us go from these unfaithful lovers and find contentment elsewhere, far from the sordid iniquity that is Pasadena. You know I've always loved you...Only my lemminglike sense of social responsibility keeping me bound to this incredibly attractive and statuesque beauty who pales like the moon before the sun of your radiance."

"Leonard?!" Penny, pleading...Narrow glance at Amy. "You vixen, Amy Farrah Fowler...I always knew you planned to steal him from me. Deliberately toning down your incredible sexual allure, pretending to be my friend."

"Never, once bestie..." shake of head. "I have ever been true to one man...Sheldon Lee Cooper...Who, sadly, in a moment of foolish surrender to surfacely flashly attractiveness, has betrayed my love."

"Oh, Amy..." Sheldon, sadly. "So true...Don't abandon me, Amy. Tell me you can forgive as is your noble nature."

"Sheldon...If you leave me now, I'll make like the Restoration mistress of Charles II and vow to dash this babe's head against the wall!" Penny glared.

"Penny?!" Amy, horrified.

"Unless of course...Leonard?" Penny eyed him. "I accept your old proposal and offer a two-fer..." Holding up baby. "After all, I've my doubts about your sperm count..."

"Oh, wretched creature...Beautiful but heartless..." Leonard, sighing... "Amy, come with me...Be mine, fair Amy and know the joys of my asthmatic but really dedicated love."

"Villain! She is not for you, scoundrel! Have at thee!" Sheldon raising two swords, one hooked on the other...Tossing one free to Leonard who snatched it...

Clash of swords as Penny leers... "Lets see some blood, boys!"

Amy pleading for peace...

"Zounds..." Leonard, gasping at Sheldon's shrewd thrust, collapsing... "I be slain!...Oh, apothecary! My inhaler!"

Howard in apothecary cap... Sighs at the fallen Leonard..."Such drugs as I have shan't cure so mortal a wound...Prythee callest the cops, dudes and dudettesfor murder has been committed upon this fair experimental physicist, my friend."

"In sooth I know not why I am so sad...I'm finally free of the foul demon who did plague my heart." Leonard, faint... "Farewell, beloved Amy." Dies...

"Oh, my Leonard! Oh, do I repent now of my wickedness!" Penny cries... "And die I now of 16th century style childbed fever." Dies.

"Sheldon?" Amy rushes to the now fallen Sheldon...Struck by Leonard in the fight, only now the wound proving mortal...

"Death cannot sting so much as the loss...Of thy love, fairest Amy. Forgive and...Oh, Jesus this hurts! Howard?!"

"Such drugs as I have..." Howard begins...

"Oh, shut up!" Ow, ow..." Sheldon, howling... "Amy?! Forgive...OW! Jesus!..."

"Soft kitty, warm kitty..." Amy begins...

"Oh...I die at peace, forgiven by...OW, oh Lord OW!" Sheldon...Dies...

"Dr. Fowler...?" Stein, gently...

"Uh...Yes, go on Doctor...You were saying how you fathered Susan on your best friend's girlfriend and then fought in a duel?" Amy, blinking.

"What?"

"Sorry...You fathered Susan...?"