Harry Potter and His Shadows

Chapter 11: The return

Harry stood outside Number 4 Privet Drive,  desperately trying to take in shaky shallow breaths as Cherié helped him narrowly avoid a panic attack. Voldemort had left a couple of minutes ago, after Harry had repeatedly reassured him that he would be just fine. Which was a lie. Because currently, he couldn't move. Or breathe. He looked up to his left where Cherié stood, watching him silently. He frowned, hating how scared these muggles where. He straightened his back and started walking towards the door. These people held no power over him anymore. He was loved, and he was safe, and he was powerful. It was time they understood that. He strolled forward, outwardly calm even as his fists turned white from being clenched so harshly. He wandlessly threw open the door, startling Dudley, who'd been in the process of cramming barbeque crisps down his throat. His cousin squeaked in surprise, choking on the mouthful as crumbs sprayed over the perfectly hoovered carpet and Aunt Petunia ran out with a concerned look on her face. Once she saw him, her expression twisted into one of anger and disdain, her high pitched voice screeching, "Freak, what are you doing back? We thought you'd left for good this time!" Until that point, Harry had been drowning in anxiety, memories of old pains flooding back, but upon hearing those words, a fiery strength filled his every nerve. He flung his hand out, magic throwing his aunt and cousin to the floor, as the lights in the house dimmed and flickered, shadows stretching and growing along the floor, ceiling and walls to trap the pair and a shadowy cage.  Petunia's eyes widened in terror, her body frozen in fear at the darkness surrounding her. "Boy! What are you doing? Get away from them, I'll kill you properly this time, I will!"  Harry glared, his anger intensifying, shadows taking shape into large wolves and serpents. His Uncle quivered in fear, shrinking away from the creatures as black fangs and claws lunged for him. Smokey tendrils wrapped around his ankles, hoisting him into the air, and he started to weep as he hung upside down, helpless at the face of such power. Harry sighed, even now he couldn't kill them. Seeing them there, crying and cowering in fear, he could only pity them, for their weakness and fear turned to blind hatred. He released them, walking up the stairs. "I'll be in my room. Someone will be collecting me in an hour. All you have to do is keep your mouth shut and stay out of the way. You won't be seeing me again after today, I can promise you that."

Remus walked up to the door of the Dursleys, Arthur following just behind him, thinking about seeing his cub again. It had been two years, and all he'd heard was what Sirius had told him from their letters. His heart clenched at the though of the old dog. They still hadn't found him, but they had detected traces of apparition around where Sirius's tracks stopped. If the Death Eaters had him for this long it could only mean one thing... He shook his head, shooting a grimaced smile at Arthur's concerned look, before knocking on the front door firmly. It would be good to see Harry again. The door opened, revealing a wonderful sight. He looked so much like James, dark messy hair, awkward grin, the glasses. Now though, he could see some of Lily growing into the boy. His face had become narrower and more slanted, eyes almond shape and an even brighter green. He smiled, "Hello Harry, how are you?" Harry leaned back into the house, shouting, "Uncle Vernon, I'm leaving now." Their only reply was a grunt, and Harry rolled his eyes pulling his suitcase out and shutting the door. "Hello Professor Lupin, Mr. Weasley, I'm ok I guess. Much better now you're here." Remus frowned at that response. In another life, He would have been Uncle Moony, greeted with grins and hugs. He hated how formal things were between he and Harry, especially now he no longer had Sirius.  "You needn't be so formal, I'm not your professor anymore Harry. You can just call me Remus." Arthur nodded, leaning in slightly as he shrunk Harry's suitcase. "And how many times have Molly and I asked you to call us by our names?" Harry grinned sheepishly, ducking his head and running his hand through his hair. He laughed out a quick, "Sorry," but said no more. He nodded at Arthur, holding Harry's shoulder tightly. "Hold on tight."

Before Harry could ask what they meant, magic surrounded them, and he felt like every atom at once was being forced through a thin tube. When it stopped, he almost toppled to the ground, leaning on Mr.Weasley for support. "What was that!" Looking around he quickly realised that they weren't at the burrow. "Where are we?" Arthur walked ahead, waving his wand at two buildings. Remus handed him his suitcase, smiling. "That, Harry, was apparition, and this is Grimmauld Place." Harry stepped back slightly, surprised as another house leapt into view. He walked in, instantly feeling dark magic swarm around him, almost assessing him. He quickly pushed it away as Moody walked by. He always wondered what that stupid eye could see. Could it see Cherié standing behind him? Could it see the shadows clinging to him like a second skin? He was drawn out of these musings by a hand on his shoulder, Remus pushing him into the kitchen where everyone was gathered. "Harry!" Several people shouted his name at once, as Hermione flung herself at him, bushy hair blocking his vision, and Ron threw his arm around his shoulders. Guilt twisted his guts like a blunt knife. These people were here for him, because a war was going on. And now he was fighting against them. What choice do you have master? If they knew what you were, they would kill you once you had served them. Your own mother feared them. He nodded. That doesn't make it any easier. Letting go of Hermione, he looked around at the strange dark house. Grimmauld Place, he'd heard that before. Sirius, he'd mentioned this was his childhood home. "So this is where you guys are staying, how come?" Molly was busy bustling around the kitchen cooking, but turned to nod at her husband. Arthur nodded, "Right. Well Harry, You-know-who has been so much more active recently. We figured, if he was starting to make his stand again, we needed to get the old team back together." He was still confused. He'd been with Voldemort, he really hadn't done that much this summer. And he didn't understand who all these strangers were. "You haven't answered any of the lads questions Arthur. Harry, in the first war, we were part of a resistance called the Order of the Phoenix, your parents were part of it. This is Nymphadora Tonks, Mundungus Fletcher, Dedalus Diggle, Elphias Doge and Kingsley Shacklebolt. You of course know the rest of us." One by one they all came up to shake hands with him, some thanking him, obviously as taken in with the Boy-Who-Lived as the rest of the public. Moody sat down again, nodding at Harry. "As for where you are, this is where Sirius had been living since you got him out of Azkaban. We've been using it as a headquarters for a whiles now, and it's under the fidelius charm, so it's perfectly safe. Constant Vigilance!" Harry rolled his eyes at the old cliché, drawing strength from Cherié's silent support. "Great, I guess. Where's Sirius then, is he still staying here?"  He turned towards the door, as if expecting Sirius to be standing there, but really he was trying to hide his tears. He'd condemned Sirius to death and now was tricking his friends. He heard a few muffled tears behind him, and realised that Remus had suddenly sat heavily in a chair. "I'm sorry lad. But one of the reasons we're so worried is because You-know-who took Black. He's dead, I'm afraid." It was the usual blunt way of Mad-eye, but hearing it said so plainly was the breaking point. Tears were flowing in streams and he couldn't stop them. He heard Hermione and Ron talking to him, and Molly trying to give him a hug, but it wasn't getting through. He couldn't be there right now. He ran out of the kitchen up the stairs into the nearest room he found before slamming the door and locking it. He cried and cried until his tears dried out, crawling over to the bed and curling up in the sheets. Even now, with all his guilt, all he wanted was for Voldemort to be here with him now, to comfort him and tell him that his emotions were being illogical because he himself hadn't killed Sirius. He laughed through his pain at that. Harry? He sat up suddenly, recognising that voice. Voldemort?  He smiled when he realised he was using their link to talk. They couldn't do it a lot, their link wasn't strong enough for that, but it would work when they needed it.  I could feel your emotions through the link. What is wrong? It was a strange feeling, as if Voldemort was behind him, whispering in his ear. I'm fine now. They just told me about Sirius...  It was silent for a moment and Harry started to worry that he had simply left, but then finally Voldemort replied. I'm sorry. This can't be easy for you. Harry thought it was sweet that he was at least trying to get Harry's emotions. It's fine. I'll be okay, I just needed to be away from them for a while. They'll think it's grief, so at least they'll be less suspicion. I'll see you in a couple of weeks right? They agreed to meet in Hogsmeade when Harry returned to Hogwarts, and he fell asleep dreaming about a room of fire and a glowing silver bird with the shadow of an old friend.

Hermione and Ron sat in Ron's room, the twins and Ginny joining them. "I'm worried about Harry." Ron nodded, for once not talking about Quidditch, chess or eating. "Yeah, losing Sirius is a blow." Hermione frowned, looking around at her friends. "It's more than that. First he has to deal with everything in the Tri-wizard Tournament, then he has to stay with his horrid relatives, and he finally gets away, only to find that his only really family, Sirius, is gone!" Everyone in the room fell silent thinking. Ginny frowned, poor Harry! "It must feel like everything is going wrong for him!" Hermione, Ginny and Ron nodded, the twins being uncharacteristically quiet and serious. The trio never even noticed the pranksters leave.

"Fred, something is off about Harry." George nodded, looking across the hall at the door to Harry's room. "There is, glad as I am to see it, he looks good. He's wearing proper clothes, he's no where near as skinny as he normally is after the summer." Fred shrugged, taking a seat on the barrier just above his brother. "It's a good change. I'm glad he's doing better. I just feel like Harry is hiding something. Do we do something?" George was silent for a minute, just watching the door, as if he could somehow see Harry through it. "I think, as long as Harry is safe and happy, it doesn't matter what's going on. If we tell anyone, they'll badger him and tell him off for it. He doesn't need that. " They both stood, walking back to their room. "If Harry want's to tell us, he can. We'll keep an eye out for him and let him know we're here. That's all we can do..."