Rule 86

The food chain

A few days later, the trio of mischief makers had plotted their next plan. 

They put a bunch of play area balls that you'd find in McDonalds and filled a storage room with them. 

All that had to happen was for someone to open it, and they would be attacked by plastic spheres of death. 

"You know, I think we need a larger room for detention," Dwight suggested. "The library's not good anymore. Maybe the cafeteria plus the gymnasium?" 

"Mhm," Stricker replied as she started to unlock the door. 

"Although gymnasium comes in handy..." 

Stricker screamed as she was drowned by the toys. 

"Oh, my God. That could've been me!" Dwight said in shock. 

In Mr. Teller's room, it was about to get interesting. 

"Alright," Teller said as he drumrolled on the desk with his fingers. "Shon, has a homework question about the food chain. So why don't we band together as a class and help him. Shon?" 

Shon stammered not able to ask his question. 

"Shon, are you having a panic attack?" Teller asked him. 

"Y-Yeah," he choked out. 

"Yeah, okay so just breathe." 

He breathed. 

"And remember the question that you asked me earlier." 

"Probably won't show up on the B.L.A.A.R.," Shon stuttered. 

"The B.L.A.A.R. does not dictate everything that you need to know from the real world. Now, we're together for a half hour every morning. We might as well make it count. Rafe, C.J, you guys spend all day drawing. Why don't you put that to good use and come draw us a food chain?" Teller called on them. 

They looked at each other. 

"No, we're good. I mean, we only work in pen anyways, so..." they trailed off, clicking their pens. 

"No, I've seen your homework. It's done exclusively in invisible ink. Come on. Draw us the food chain. Both of you," Teller said tossing C.J. a piece of chalk. "Walk us through it." 

"Okay, well, the sun shines down onto the grass, which keeps growing until a cow comes along and eats it," C.J. explained. 

"That's the primary consumer." 

"The cow gets nice and big. And then it gets taken to a slaughterhouse. And we use it to make hamburgers and all that." She pointed her painted finger at the slaughterhouse she had drawn. She had blue and purple ombre nails today. 

C.J. handed the chalk to Rafe who kept drawing and picked up her explanation. "One day, a hungry bully with a bad haircut comes by. Eats the hamburgers." 

"That's the secondary consumer." 

"But he keeps eating the hamburgers. He keeps eating, and eating, and eating until he gets so fat, that he just sort of explodes." 

The class groaned. "Ugh!" 

Rafe turned and saw Miller punching his fist. 

"Uh...but that is good. For the maggots," he quickly said turning back around. "And then, in turn enrich the grassy field, which another cow comes along and eats." 

"So, um, yeah. That's our food chain," the pair said together. 

"That is...very detailed and super awesome. Thank you," Teller said looking at their drawing. 

The farting bell rang. 

"All right everybody. You know what that sound means. You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here. Let's go. Out, out, out!" Teller said. 

"Hey. Khatcha-drawian," Miller stalked over to Rafe. 

C.J. pinched the bridge of her nose in annoyance and sighed. 

"I'm gonna roundhouse you in the face," he threatened. 

"Do it," Teller said, standing up from his desk. 

"Do what?" 

"Roundhouse him. Roundhouse him in the face. Cause I don't think you can. I don't think it's physically possible for your leg to get that high," Teller gestured to Rafe's head, "from where you're standing." 

"Well...uh..." 

"I know I can't. If I tried to do it, my groin would snap, like that." Teller snapped his fingers. 

"Of course I can, but..." Miller searched his mind for an excuse. "I just can't do it now because, uh, I forgot to renew the lethal weapon registration on my feet." 

C.J. snickered. 

"Yeah, that's a bummer. I hate it when that happens," Teller said, faking sympathy. 

"Yeah," Miller said unsurely. 

"Yeah." 

Miller picked his bag up from the floor. "Gotta go," he said. 

"Okay. We'll rain check it." Miller walked off and Teller watched him go with a smile. 

After class, Teller was standing on the stairs giving advice. "Look there's no easy way to break up with someone. But if you feel that you weren't into anymore, then you did the right thing. You had to tell her. You know? You gotta do you. That's the most important thing. I learned that from my ex-wife," he finished, glancing up and seeing the best friend duo in his homeroom. "Hey, uh, Rafe, C.J., that was some drawing back there," he told them. 

They laughed lightly, but still smiled. "Thanks. It was nothing." 

"No, it was very much something. What're kids like you doing lumped in with all these other kids?" he asked them. 

They looked at each other as they stopped in front of the trophy case. "It's been a rough couple years...for us," they said. 

"I lost my brother. Cancer," Rafe said, looking up at Teller. 

"Both my parents were killed in a car crash by a drunk driver," C.J. told her story. 

"Oh, man. I'm sorry. That's terrible," Teller responded sympathetically. 

They nodded and looked down at their shoes. 

Dwight walked over to them. "You guys are making me a little nervous standing here. Remember rule number 34." 

"Don't touch the trophy case?" the two teens replied. 

"Very, very good. See what a favor I did you by getting rid of that awful notebook, so you can make more productive use of your time?" He chuckled, and Mr. Teller gave him a look like 'seriously?'. 

Rafe and C.J. looked at each other with a similar expression before looking back at the principal. 

"Is there something you'd like to say to me right now?" Dwight asked the pair of them. 

The students were silent for a moment. "No, sir," C.J. said as she dragged Rafe away.