My Little Moron

Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

One of the best parts about their better friendship was that Gladys no longer had bad dreams. Even when things weren't going so well, all she had to do was tell him, and he made it better. Sometimes, though, she would wake him up in the middle of the night 'for old time's sake', and they would chat some more, and even though they spent all day talking they never seemed to run out of subjects. On these occasions she would still sing, but they were no longer sad songs, which he was very happy about. He was very glad to have had a real impact on her outlook on life. She never sang the same one twice, with one exception: she seemed to really like the one he had first heard her sing, and it seemed to fit her mood no matter what that happened to be. When he asked her why she liked it so much, she merely shrugged and did not answer.

The next morning, though, he had thought of something he needed to ask her about it. Oi, Gladys, y'know that song you like?

Mm.

You know the part that goes, come fire come fire, let love come racing through?

Of course.

What's love, Gladys?

She did not answer for a very long time. He was sure it was longer than five minutes, which was far longer than she'd ever before taken to answer a question. That's... a hard question to answer. I'd been waiting for you to bring it up, actually. I didn't want you to, but I knew it would happen eventually.

Do your best, luv. Please?

Well... it's a feeling humans have sometimes. Sometimes it's for each other, or for an animal. Children can fall in love with objects. Adults can, but don't do it very often.

What does it feel like?

I don't know. But humans are willing to go to great lengths to feel it. Judging from their music alone, they would allow themselves to be brought pretty low for it. They'd even die for it, which makes no sense, but I suppose that's how they're trying to describe their devotion.

Wheatley was more confused than when they'd started. But how do they know when they're in love, if you can't describe it?

It seems to be generally accepted that when humans really love each other, they will do anything for each other. They do little things to make each other happy. They meet each other halfway. They think about the other all of the time. They identify themselves in personality tests with labels that describe their relationship to their significant other. I guess the best way to describe it is to say that they put themselves aside, and put the well-being of the other person first.

Wheatley thought about all of that for a minute. That sounds nice, doesn't it? To be in love with someone, well, someone who loves you back, that is. Loving someone who doesn't is kind of, kind of sad.

I suppose.

D'you ever think that someone might love you, Gladys?

What? Me? Gladys sounded like she'd just been hit with something very heavy. Of course not. I'm a supercomputer. Supercomputers don't fall in love. Love is for humans. Nobody would ever love me because I'm not human. Not that I want a human to love me. That would be disgusting.

Well, Wheatley mused, having to admit that made sense, what if there was another supercomputer like you, only it was, I dunno, had male programming, I guess. D'you think he would love you?

No, Gladys said firmly. I don't have time for that. Love makes you stupid, and I am not stupid. How am I supposed to do Science if I've got some supercomputer pining for my attention all the time? No thanks. I'll pass.