Keeper of the Lost Cities: LGBTQ+ Edition

Part IV: Chapter Two

A/N: aah i'm so sorry for the EXTREMELY long wait !! life has been ... crazy lately, as i'm sure all of you can feel. covid-19 is really messing things up. how are you guys doing? i was very excited to see that i have readers from all around the world now, not just the usa and my country. and speaking of that: 14.3K READS ?!?!? HOW THE ACTUAL -- OMG I LOVE YOU GUYS LMAO, I REALLY DO NOT DESERVE THIS

anyways, applause if you actually read through my cringe-worthy a/ns. let's get on with the marellinh !!

MARELLA REDEK

I am an IDIOT, I am an IDIOT, I am a freaking absolutely stupid IDIOT.

I hold my head in my hands, heat rushing to my face. I'm probably, quite literally, smoking from the ears. According to my dad, that has happened before. My palms feel cold against my burning face -- ah, I hope my face isn't actually burning, either ...

I AM SUCH AN IDIOT.

The memory of her smooth lips ever so gently touching mine warms my mouth, her freshwater scent lingering in my hair. I ball my fists as my heart pounds in my chest, each beat drowning out the sound around me.

Stupidstupidstupid. Why did you do that? Why the hell did I do that?

"Because I love her," I whisper, muffling my words with my fist. I squeeze my eyes shut. "And I hate it."

It feels like I've loved her forever, like all my life had always been associated with silver-tipped hair and cold hands and carefree smiles. Even if it hadn't been so long when I first saw her, awestruck by her beauty and the lightness of her features yet the hint of dark in her eyes, it felt like I'd known her for the entirety of my being.

I'd first seen her, wondering what had happened to make the strong, lovely female have such sadness in her silvery-blue eyes, but quickly turned my gaze to Tam. Because I'm supposed to look at the boy. Not the girl.

I tug on my braids furiously, flames flickering between my fingers. I hate her. I hate Linh Song.

"Why does she have to do this to me?" I growl to myself, ignoring the hustle around me as Foxfire moved to their next classes. I'm no Vanisher, but somehow I have made myself invisible. When I'm not speaking, gossiping, or delivering comebacks, I'm suddenly nobody.

I can't remember what I have next and suddenly, I don't care. I hate this. I hate falling in love, I hate being impulsive, I hate wondering if I'm becoming my mother. I hate being nobody. I hate covering up everything I do and everything I want, I hate covering up who I am, covering up my own ability--

I just hate this.

I stand, drawing in deep breaths as I smell smoke around me. Next class has already begun, and the halls are abandoned. My footsteps clatter on the ground as I dig through my bag, my fingers wrapping around my home crystal.

"Buh-bye," I mutter, holding it up into the light.

***

HOLD ON HOLD IT TOGETHER -- CONCENTRATE, MARELLA!

My home finally materializes around me, and I fall to the ground, dizzy.I stare at my hands, praying they're not faded.

They're solid. I sigh in relief. Again, I am an idiot.

"You should know better than to light leap when you can't concentrate, dumbass," I grumble as I stagger to my feet, dusting off my tunic. As my vision clears, I stumble towards the door, the ground shaky beneath my feet.

(i don't know how to describe marella's house because i can't remember when the keeper crew went there ... i also cannot remember what it is called. please inform me if you know XD otherwise, sorry for the lack of setting!)

Finally in the house, I stumble into the kitchen for a glass of water, but even just the sight of the glass makes me think of her again. I choke on the water.

Get it together, Marella!

"Marella?"

I look up at my mom, standing in the doorway, her eyes tired and drooping.

"Already home?" she asks, frowning. "School's over?"

"Uh ... yeah, early dismissal," I say quickly, watching her carefully. I never know if she's going to become an entirely new person in front of me. Why couldn't I just be an Empath?

"I didn't know it was early dismissal," she replies slowly, looking at her feet. "I didn't know ..." I grit my teeth as her dragging pace wears on my already-short nerves.

"Well, now you do," I snap, turning away to dump the water in the sink. That's when I realize the glass is melting in my hand. A harsh curse passes through my lips and I drop the molten glass into the sink, which promptly begins to creak from the heat.

Frustration begins to pour into my veins and fire flickers all over my body, and I yank the cold water on, splashing it on myself, but it only turns to steam and I can only think of her again. I whip around--

"Marella--" my mother starts, but I cut her off.

"NO! Just STOP! STOP IT!" I scream, and I run past her, a trail of black footprints behind me, out of the house and away without any destination.

a/n: wtf did i just write? well, oof. i didn't mean to be so angsty ... sorry marella ... lol i feel like i've disappointed you guys after the long wait, but i also need to update so i'm just going to stick with this. apologies! my writing is actual trash, especially since i haven't written in forever.