Where Am I in his life?

Chapter 13

Next day morning Kunal arrives to Bhuj. 
Kunal: Haa Nishant Mein hotel ke saamne hu. 
Nishant: Room Number 701 mein aa jao. Am waiting. 
Kunal doesn't understand why did Nishant want to meet him all of a sudden and what happened to him. He had some hopes that this will lead him to Kuhu , whom he is searching from 2 weeks. 

Kunal reaches the room and Knocks on the door. 
Nishant: Come in!
Kunal enters. 
Kunal: Nishant Tum India kab aaye ? 
Nishant: Cut the crap Kunal, Mein tumse yeh silly baate karne tumhe yaha nahi bulaya hu. 
Kunal was shocked by Nishant's tone. Nishant was usually a cool and clam person. Even when he got to know about Kunal spiking his drink he didn't loose his temper, but today it was different. Kunal could sense anger Nishant's tone. He was furious and it was visible in Nishant's eyes. Kunal was silent. He didn't speak a word. 
Nishant: Kunal tumhe pata hai meri sabse badi galti kya hai ?
Kunal moves his head in a no. 
Nishant: Jab Mishti ne mujh se shaadi todhi na .. tab Kuhu ko yaha akele chod kar jana meri sabse badi galti thi. Aur Kuhu ki sabse badi galti yeh ki usne tumse doosri shaadi ki. 
Kunal was thunderstruck. He couldn't believe what Nishant just said. 
Kunal: Kya?
Nishant: Haa sahi kaha meine. Mujhe London jaana nahi chahiye tha. Mujhe laga meri behen ko uska fairytale mil gaya. Par nahi . Pehle tumne usse pyaar karne ka natak kiya, usse shaadi ki. Shaadi ki thi toh atleast a chance dete us rishte ko , nahi  tunme usse divorce dena chaha ? Kyu? Kyuki tumhe Mishti ko Abir se door rakhna tha. Phir jab wo finally tumhe chod ke jaa rahi thi tab tumhe realize hota hai uska importance aur tum usse phir shaadi karte ho. Aur uske baad bhi tumhe Kuhu hi galat lagti hai. Aur tum uss peh Abir ko maarne ki koshish karne ka ilzaam lagate ho?
Tumne meri behen ko samjh kya rakha hai Mr Kunal Rajvansh ? KUHU MERI BEHEN HAI KOHI KHILONA NAHI.   

Kunal didn't have any answer for this. He knew that what Nishant said was the truth and this truth was bitter to swallow. 

Nishant: Aagar mein yaha hota toh ye sab jaane ke baad Kuhu ko Kabhi Tumse phir se shaadi karne nahi deta. Shukar manao ki tum abhi bhi mere saamne khaade ho.  Ek ladke ne Kuhu ko Bully kiya tha school mein aur meine uski naak todh di thi. Tumhe idea nahi hai Kunal ki meine apne gusse ko kitna control kiya hai. 

 Kuhu kya hai meri liye tumhe idea bhi nahi hai. Kyuki tumne kabhi usse jaane ki koshish nahi ki. Tumhe Kuhu Maheshwari kon hai ,kaisi hai pata hai. Kuhu as a Bahu kaisi hai sab pata hai. Par asal mein Kuhu kaisi hai tumhe nahi pata Kunal. Tumhe uski puri kahani nahi pata. Sab logo sochte hai ki mein apni Behen ke liye kuch zyada hi concerned  hu. Jab baat Kuhu ki aati hai sab bolte hai Mein kuch zyada hi sochta hu. Over react karta hu agar Kuhu ko kuch ho jata hai toh. Haa Mein hu aisa hi Kyuki Meine dekha hai Kuhu Ko. Tumhe pata nahi hoga , aaj mein tumhe batata hu Kuhu ke struggle ke baare mein. Wo chee saal ki choti si baachi thi jab wo Humare Ghar aayi thi. Subh Shaam apne Maa ka ek photo pakadhke ghar ke ek kone mein baithke roti rehti thi. Usko kisi ne apnaya tha, Sab usse apne aap se dor karne mein lage rehte the. Kabhi Singhania House toh Kabhi Humare ghar. Har raat yehi sochti thi ki kal uske papa usse ghar le jayenge. Tumhe pata bhi hai wo choti si bachi thi, sab usse dor jaate the phir bhi wo sab se pyar karti thi. Usse kabhi kuch nahi chahiye tha, bas thoda sa pyar mil jata toh bhut khush ho jaati. Kuhu wo ladki hai jisse har rishte ke liye struggle karna pada tha Kunal. Wo 6 saal ki bachi jisse khilono se khelna chahiye tha, tab wo apne paapa se acceptance milne ke liye tadapti rahi. Usse Maheshwari Naam paane ke liye bhi struggle karna pada tha. Aise hi kisi ne apnaya nahi tha usse. Kudh rohti thi magar Varsha Tayiji ke aasu pochti thi wo. Ek Maa ka pyaar paane ke liye ussne kitni mehnat ki hai wo meine dekha hai Kunal. Mein kudh ek bacha tha tab lekin Kuhu mujh se bhi Choti thi. Issilye mein Kuhu dard mein kabhi nahi dekh sakta. Kuhu ko puri life struggle karte dekhe hai meine aur aaj bhi usse struggle karna pad raha hai. 
Nishant: Kehne ke liye kuch nahi hai na tumhare pass.  
Kunal was silent. Nishant's words was stabbing him. His red  eyes  had welled up with tears. It was becoming difficult for him to breathe. Nishant saw his condition and went up to the side table and brought a glass of water. He offered him water but Kunal refused. Nishant insisted him to have water. Kunal took the glass with trembling hands and drank it slowly. Nishant signaled Kunal to sit down and Kunal did. 
There was utter silent for a long time. Kunal was letting the truth seep in. Kunal had no idea about Kuhu's childhood. He knew nothing about her struggles. He felt miserable to not understand Kuhu and her concern for him. Kuhu knew what the struggle was to be a homeless person who didn't know where she belongs. Her fear for Kunal was so rational and Kunal had failed to realize it. It was pricking him for what he had done. The guilt for what he had done was killing him from inside and then listening to Kuhu's tussle Kunal broke even more. After  trying very  hard Kunal finally managed to speak up. Nishant was standing near the glass door of the balcony looking out. He was waiting for Kunal to speak up. 

Kunal : Nisshhh.... Nisssshaaaaa.... Nishaant 
Nishant turned around only to find Kunal standing behind him. 
Kunal : Tum... Tumhe  paa .... paaa.... pata hai na Kuhu Kaha hai keh keee?
Nishant nodded in agreement . 
Kunal: Kai... Kaisi hai wo?
Nishant: Tumhe kya lagta hai ? Kaisi hogi? Iss sab ke tum expect karte ho ki wo theek hogi?
Kunal lowered his head as he knew Kuhu is not alright after what had happened. 
Nishant: Mujhe ek baat batao Kunal , Tumne yeh socha bhi kaise Ki Kuhu , Meri Kuhu Abir ki Jaan lene ki koshish kar sakti hai? 
Kunal: Nahi Nishant Mein wo.. 
Nishant: Kunal.. Kuhu wo hai jisne Meri aur Mishti ke shaadi ke time mujhe chod kar Abir ko chuna tha. Kyu ki wo nahi chahti ki Abir uska pyaar kho de aur mein Bina pyaar ki shaadi mein bandh jau. Wo sab ka sochti hai Kunal, aur tumne ussi peh aisa ilzam daal diya. 
Kunal: Am sorry Nishant. 
Nishant: Mujhe Sorry mat kaho, Mein kon hota hua tumhe maaf karne walla. 
Kunal: Am sorry Nishant, I really am. Mujhe kudh nahi pata meine kya soch ke wo sab bol diya. I don't know what was I even thinking. 
Nishant: Jab baat Abir ki aati hai na tum kuch nahi sochte ho Kunal. Sahi galat kuch nahi sujta hai tumhe. Jaise tum Abir ko leke Roke ke function mein aa gaye the, yeh tak nahi socha ki bahar walle bhi honge waha peh. Tamasha hoga logo ke samne yeh bhi nahi socha. 
Nishant was trying to read Kunal's expression. All he could see was guilt on Kunal's face. 
Nishant: Bhai ke liye pyaar hona theek hai. Par us ek bhai ke rishtey ke liye dusre rishte bhool jaana yeh sahi nahi hai Kunal. Tum agar Abir ke bhai ho na, toh tum Kuhu ke husband bhi ho. Agar Bhai hote hue tum ek Pati hona bhool jaate ho toh chod do Kuhu ko. Tum kabhi in do rishto mein balance karna kabhi nahi seekh paoge Kunal. 
Kunal: Nahi Nishant , Mein koshish kar raha hu. 
There were tears rolling down from Kunal's eyes.
Nishant: Kab tak Kunal? Kab tak tum aise hi hurt karte rahoge Kuhu ko? Kuhu ke expectations kya kuch zyada hi baadi thi ? Bolo .. 

Kunal: Nahi Nishant Kuhu ne mujh se kabhi kuch expect nahi kiya. Wo chahe toh shaadi ke next day hi Ghar mein sabhi ko bata sakti thi , par usne nahi bataya. Meine usse kitni baar kaha ki wo wapas chali jaaye par wo kabhi nahi gayi. Meine usse kitni baar apne se dor push kiya, phir bhi wo mere pass aati rahi. Jo bhi hua, meine jo bhi kiya usne kabhi mujhe blame nahi kiya. Jab meine kaha ki mein hi sab ko divorce ke baare mein batauga tumhe pata hai usne kya kaha. Usne kaha ki wo sab ko bolengi ki compatibility issues hai issilye divorce le rahe hai. Tab bhi wo mujhe protect kar rahi thi. Meine uske saath utna galat kiya, uske  ke baadh bhi usne kabhi mujhe blame nahi kiya. Meine uske saare sapne todh diye Nishant , meine usse hi todh diya tha, phir bhi wo mujhe tootne se bachati rahi. Usne kabhi complain nahi kiya. Humesha mere liye thi, meri family ke liye thi. Meri family mein mujh se zyada usse attention milta tha. Usne sab ko apna bana liya tha. Meine uske saath bhut galat kiya hai. 
Nishant was standing there and listening to what Kunal was telling. He wanted to know what was running in Kunal's mind and what was his feelings. 
Kunal: You are right Nishant, Meine Kuhu ko kabhi samjhne ki koshish hi nahi ki, magar wo mujhe puri tarah samjh gayi. wo humesha mere saath thi, mere liye thi. Usne ek baar kaha tha ki life mein kuch bhi ho jaye wo humesha mere saath hai. Aur usne wo wada kabhi nahi todha. Wo meri har wish puri karti aayi, meine jo kaha sab kiya aur mein usse samjh hi nahi paaya. Meri Maa ne mujhe dhoka diya, mera kudh ka bhai mujhe chod ke chala gaya tha, tab bhi wo mere saath thi. Usne mere liye sab kuch kiya aur mein uske liye kuch nahi kar paya. 

Nishant: Agar usse thoda samjh hi lete na us mein hi Kuhu bhut khush ho jaati. Usse baadi baadi cheeze baadi baadi baaate nahi chahiye Kunal. Usse toh sirf tumhara saath aur tumhara Pyaar chahiye tha. Aur kuch bhi nahi. Magar tum utna bhi nahi kar paaye. 

Kunal: Nishant Please Mujhe Kuhu se milna hai. Mujhe meri galti ka ehsaas ho gaya hai. Mujhe usse milna hai. Kuhu ke bina mein Bhut bada Looser hu. Agar Kuhu meri life mein nahi hai wo meri life hi nahi hai Nishant. Please mujhe batao ki Kuhu kaha hai. 

Nishant: Meine tumhe yaha bulaya tumse baat karne ke liye Kunal, Kuhu se milwane ke liye nahi. Kuhu tum peh phir se bharosa kar sakti hai par mein nahi. Tum Kuhu Se nahi Miloge.

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Finally updating after a month. Sorry Guys have been busy the last month. Thank you for your patience. Please let me know in the comment section what you think about this chapter. Will be waiting for your reviews. Thank you for bearing with me. Next chapter will be on how many comments I get. See you soon .