𝐁𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬

𝐁𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐜𝐞

I got back into the bed and he laid down beside me staring at me, "You depressed?" He asked as I stared at him.

"No."

"Yes you is, I can tell. What's wrong? Like forreal forreal." He asked me as I sighed before I turned my attention onto the envelope that was on the bed.

I grabbed it before opening it and and I seen some pictures and stuff in it making me dump everything out and then I took out a paper.

It was a drawing of me and my Daddy and I felt tears coming to my eyes as I seen his signature on the back of it.

"Who that is?" Fazon asked me softly as I wiped my face but it didn't stop the tears.

"Me and My Daddy." I mumbled as he looked at the picture and then some of the other pictures that were in the envelope.

"Damn Saoir." He mumbled before he sat me in his lap and wrapped his arms around me as I cried into his chest.

He rubbed my back as I just let out everything, I hadn't cried about my Daddy since his funeral and it was like I was letting out all the tears I had built up.

"I miss him soo much." I cried as he rubbed my back, "I know." He mumbled as he held me close to him and I continued to cry.

It seemed like we sat there forever before I finally stopped crying, I lifted my head up and looked at him as he looked straight ahead before looking down at me.

"My eyes all puffy and stuff." I mumbled as he chuckled, "You still look good." He shrugged making me roll my eyes playfully as I wiped my eyes again and laid my head back on his chest.

I could hear his heartbeat speeding up, before he spoke, "You remember when I was tellin' you 'bout my bestfriend Marl?" He asked making me nod.

"He got killed, right in front of me. Shit fucked me up, because me and him was into it before he died. After that shit, it's like I can't ever say no to nobody. I always want everything to be good between me and everybody because you never know what can happen." He said as I just listened to him speak happy we didn't have to focus on my issues.

"I'll give my last for everybody in my life, because I think they would do the same for me."

"Tune nem burned my kitchen up like a month ago. I ain't been back to the house since then, I got a new one. I told Lisa to get somebody to fix the kitchen and for her to sell it."

"Why?"

"I don't even know. After they told me what happened I blacked out. When I came back to realization I seen that I fucked the hotel up and shit. Lisa kept asking me what was wrong, but how I'm supposed to tell her that her and everybody else around me is whats wrong?" He shook his head as I lifted my head up looking at him.

"You ain't gotta do everything for everybody. Yo' friends shouldn't live off you, they shouldn't rely on you to put a roof over they head. They supposed to stay with you till they can get they own shit." I told him as he shrugged.

"It don't bother me, forreal."

"Yes it do, you just said everybody the problem. Everybody shouldn't put all they problems and issues onto you. It's not your fault that they ain't got a place of their own." I explained as he nodded his head.

"Mob moved out after the kitchen shit, he said he was tired of all the new muhfuckas in there. And he said he too old to be partyin' all the time. Tune nem don't go to sleep it feel like, it's bitches and shit in and out all night. It's fun and shit, but that shit fuck you up too. Allem drugs and drinkin' and shit that shit fuckin' them up."

"Why you don't tell them that?" I asked him as he shrugged, "It's they life to live how they want to. I ain't nobody to tell them how to live it."

"You can tell them how to live it as long as they stayin' in yo' house."

He shook his head again, "Nah, that's them. I'm good in my space and shit."

I just stared at him before I grabbed his face making him look at me, "It's okay to say no, and to want them out of your house and stuff."

"I ain't gone put them out on they ass, that's my family. They all I got besides my Mama nem, and ion even talk to my Mama like that forreal. Only reason I talk to my sister and cousins because they call me. But they all I got out here besides Lisa. I ain't even got Lisa all the way no more, she pregnant and got allat shit goin' on wit' her and all them niggas she fuckin' wit'." He waved it off as I looked him in his eyes.

"If they makin' you unhappy and stoppin' you from being happy then you need to let them go."

"They ain't stoppin' me from bein' happy. I'm stoppin' myself from bein' happy." He said as I just looked at him before looking away.

"You know everybody think I gotta drug problem?" He asked me as I didn't say anything.

I heard about him and his drug problems all in the media. He has been seen doing his fair share of drugs, but that was none of my business because he always seemed sober around me, atleat to me he did.

"Why they think that?"

"Because I like to party and shit, I pop pills, I do coke sometimes if it ain't no pills. I used to drink lean, I stopped though it used to make me real sick and shit. But I don't even gotta problem. I do drugs because I want to at that moment not because I need em.

Whenever I'm wit' you, I never do drugs because I want you to have the real me. And this shit might sound like some lame ass shit g, but you gimme a high. Like bein' 'round you I feel like I'm on anotha' planet or some shit." He shrugged making me nod my head.

"When we're together it's like we in our own little world, even when we went to the awards a couple weeks ago. We were there, but we were there forreal." I said as he nodded his head, "Yeah that."

"But drugs is something I enjoy though, like when I pop some pills and get inna booth I make the best shit ever. When I'm high I don't care about nothing or nobody else. I don't have to worry about nothing, it's the best feeling in the world.

But I can stop at any time, like I don't need em at all. Muhfuckas just think I do because I like em." He told me before I shook my head.

"You already said the drugs and shit fuckin' up your friends, so you know it's fucking you up too."

"Nah I know how far is too far. Them niggas don't, they drink all day long. By the end of the night they do drunk they don't even know they names." He said shaking his head thinking about it.

"I used to get drunk and shit like that. But after I went home to visit my family, I ain't been wantin' to do allat shit no more. Then I be around you, and it's like I'm addicted to you, yo' vibe, everything 'bout you." He explained as I felt myself blushing as I wrapped my arms around him.

"I like how we don't need to talk about titles or nothing, we can just do us without allat shit. We just Saoir Jade and Faze. We gotta vibe that can't be labeled." He shook his head making me look at him.

"Stop talking, you're making me blush." I said as he looked at me chuckling before he leaned down kissing my lips.
_____________________________

This shit took me all fuckin day to write and it still aint even right.

Ya'll can thank that nigga Rod Wave for this, without him ya'll wouldn't have got shit omm.

- BAABYPRADA🍍