Taken By The Bad Boy

39 Goodbye

     "It's normal to miss someone."

     "Not like this! It's like...like my heart is ripped out but I can't even try to put it back because she has it. She took it with her and left me crying on the floor with a wine bottle to my lips." I explain, yelling but soon whispering as the words tear me to pieces. I hear Aiden sigh and he looks at me.

      "Isaac, you can't let her break you like this. She's just a girl! I know you think she's someone great and I'm sure she is great but you have to remember, there are other great girls in the world. You can't just be hung up on one when there are billions others on this planet."

    "That was harsh."

     "Yeah but the truth is harsh and I hate to be the one to tell you all of this but someone has to."

    "She wasn't just great though, that's the thing. She was amazing, talented, funny, smart, stubborn, beautiful and just...just well perfect. I know there's no such thing as perfect but she is. Even though she's broken, I still think she's perfect."

    "How is she broken?"

    "Her ex-boyfriend died like what was it? Four years ago? Yeah, anyways she's still hurting from that but I understand. Losing someone is never easy. But she has baggage and demons she's trying to run from. I guess we all are but hers haunt her. It breaks her."

     "You love her don't you?" Aiden whispers to me and I put the wine down to look at him. He's staring at me with a small smile but sadness in his eyes. Do I love her? Well what is love? What is the universal definition of loving someone? How do we as humans know we love someone? The simple answer is...we don't know. It's different for everyone.

      But what is it to me? Well it's when she's all you can think about. When no one else is on your mind like her. When she smiles and all you can do is stare. When you look at her and you see a future with her. When you are in public and there's a ton of people around but the only person who catches your eye is her. When you'd do anything to protect her, even if it means you end up dead. When you are willing to give her up to keep her happy. When you let her go, knowing she deserves better. When she takes your breath away by hearing her laugh. When you could spend the rest of your life waking up next to her. That's what love is to me. So...I do love her.

     No matter how hard I had tried to keep my heart from choosing her, it couldn't listen. It knew what it wanted as soon as it saw her. I always knew it would be her from the moment she came stumbling into the woods. I knew she was going to be the next girl to break my heart. I knew she was going to be the next girl who I loved. I knew she was going to be yet another one who I couldn't have.

     "Yes. Yes, I do love her." I answer Aiden, looking away. A few tears start sliding down my cheek again and I quickly wipe them away. Then I shake my head. It's not like it matters! Loving her won't make her come back! Loving her won't make her stay! Loving her won't do anything but hurt me!

"Why?"

"Why what? Why do I love her?"

"Yes. Why do you love her?"

"Because...because..." I start but no words come out and Aiden looks at me, confused but at the same time like he knows what's going on.

"Let me ask you this, have you ever been in love?" I ask him and he shakes his head, looking away. I scoff. We've all managed to do that when we don't want someone to know the truth. Just shake our head no and turn away.

     "Just answer the question, Aiden."

     "Yes." I hear him whisper and I wait for him to explain about her. After a minute or two, he eventually does.