how did people discover that kinks were pleasurable.
like.
at the beginning of time.
the story of it all.
ah alas, my most humble apology wife, i hath lost control of mine shoe laces and now they're around thy wrists
no no. i l i k e i t, h u s b a n d
yeah sir, i wast dragged into an alley and this guy—he wast fair ASF. is t rape if 't be true i enjoyed t? nahh
ooohhh daddy!! OH FIE I HAS'T—
*guy instantly ejaculates*
AN EXPLANATION?
*guy wraps wench in a blanket* aww i feeleth like a little burrito baby. laughing sans intermission an hour by the dial wouldn't t beest comical if 't be true thee gaveth me a pacifier *guy pulls pacifier out of nowhere* ho this is KINDA hot ngl
*engaging in amorous rite* *suddenly realizes they're in the middle of a park* ho. this kinda enhances the experience don't ya bethink?
oh hell yeah don't cease now~
heheh thou has't a small dick
BITCH THEE RECEIVETH ON MINE NERVES OFT! *starts to choke her*
*m o a n*
*innocent person being hath walked through giving a hickey to experienced person, by hath said experienced person* yeah so just suck—yeah yeah well enow. now thee should consume me; ) *they bite down* oOoh that's not what i meanteth but—nevermind, you are doing most wondrous honey 🥵
*school mascot gets stuck in their costume*
it's well enow babe. just filthy talk me to satisfy mine sexual urges. ho cometh to bethink about t... you're looking kinda sexy
please. please cease thy sexual acts.
oh yeah baby sayeth that again~
no very much thee needeth to cease *scream*
oH YeAhHh
*god engaging in amorous rite with mary* ah the horror! wrong hole!
no that doth feel good—pretty sure if 't be true thee alas me in mine buttocks first i'll still beest a virgin if 't be true thee alas me in mine pussy after
hmm yeah maketh sense to me!
*person cannot cease nosebleed*
man thee beest looking seductive with that blood on thy visage
voyeurism—looking at thee, abel. that gent is the younger brother. forsooth, cain hath lost his virginity first. god sayeth, 'ayy he's growing up to beest just like me! a little anal loving creep in the making. cain, go, prick thy face, and over-red thy fear, thou lily-liver'd boy.')
ho, so mine cousin toldeth me about these new things hath called 'kinks'! i wast thinking we could tryeth those folk out?
what is this 'kink' thee speaketh of?
something thee very much like sexually, methinks?
oh. well... all i would for is love and affection.
awwwww! thee right thee right. let us canoodle
a pox on you >:(
oh. but thee art having amorous rite with me?
cause thee art a slut, and i'm horny
oh~
SHUT UP WENCH!
oHh~~
NO! YOU'RE LACKING VALOR!
OOOHHHH~~~~
ho so, i has't very much long nails that i sharpened into points and i am proud cause they're badass and i needeth to intimidate mine enemies since this is a very long time ere 2020 so that is how t worketh. oh yeah i sharpened mine teeth too. doth thee wanteth a blowjob nonetheless?
oh HELL aye baby sCrAtCh mE~
doth thee ever loseth thy wilt to liveth cause t happeneth all the time
i don't knoweth what lest i doing but i very much wanna die
i hath sent mine brother's girlfriend this text that wast supposed to wend to mine best friend
i'm my most humble apology and farewell everyone, t looks like this is the end.
-shakespeare
