Arcus // ATEEZ ✔

10: among the faded pages

Serim runs her hand over the cover of the leather-bound book, smearing dust on her palm as this is the first time she's picked it up since she stopped using it around a year ago. The princess is currently busy with the princes from the other realms, seemingly having a discussion in which she's not allowed to join in. She is free from any direct obligations so she's spending time in her modest room, trying to lift her mind off of things even though they seem endless.

She unwinds the rope around the book, the pages expanded and edges frayed from the constant use back then, but she no longer found time to even open it due to the constant demands from the princess. She sifts through the pages; her feelings flowing among the pieces. The carbon scratches take shape as something she enjoys doing in her free time, though she barely has any as the years go by. The pages have started to turn yellow, but the markings remain.

'Beautiful markings', as what Seonghwa once told her.

She opens the book, her hand itching to pick up a wooden pencil again; the material she needs to let her feelings out on the initially-white paper. The lines and curves take shape as the scenery around the palace, or what she sees as she goes to town alongside the princess. She captures what she experiences perfectly through her drawings; the only talent she feels proud of. She never drew portraits, except for one person.

She stares at the portraits of the single person scattered among the pages, feeling like the person is now a mere stranger, just like how they used to be.

---

3 years ago

The princess had went on a trip to another realm with the king and queen, and Serim was left behind at the palace; the princess said that she'd only be a burden to bring around. Serim is 19 at that time, and despite already having a few years of experience as Narae's lady-in-waiting, she still feels like she needs a lot to learn.

Though she knows it's wrong for her to be moving around the palace, it's the first time she's able to roam freely without having to rush to the princess whenever she calls for her. It's like she's seeing the interior of the palace in a new light; as if it's the first time she knows how many halls the palace has, how the hallways twist and turn, making someone unfamiliar with it to become lost.

With the sketchbook in her hand and pencil in another, she walks around the palace like she's having a self-guided tour. She takes in everything, appreciates every single detail while capturing them in her sketchbook. As soon as she arrives at the library, she hides herself among the shelves when Prince Seonghwa suddenly comes in, under his arms a stack of books he is looking to put back on the shelves.

She doesn't want him to notice her presence, and it would be awkward for her to suddenly appear in front of him while scurrying to exit the library. So she stays quietly among the towering books that can conceal her, all through praying that he would leave quick. Her wish doesn't happen to come true though, as it seems that the prince is someone who loves to spend hours in the library. To make things worse, he's currently seated at the desk nearest to the door, making it impossible for her to escape without being noticed.

Her legs are starting to become numb from standing so she sits down, repeats it a lot of times but still the prince is concentrating on the book in front of him, body as still as a statue. Then she does what she never did before - she takes out her pencil, opens her sketchbook, looks at him to capture his details before putting down her work. As much time as it takes for her to draw him, she finds herself drawn to him more and more.

She notices his details she's not able to lay her eyes upon before. How his perfectly proportionate body is rigid as he delves into the book, his sparkling eyes under his reading glasses flicking back and forth in a hurried pace to capture the words on the pages and his lips occasionally pushed to form a pout, or bitten as he concentrates fully.