Replay {Skephalo}

26 | Fear

The faint sound of a light switch can be heard from across the apartment. Followed by footsteps. My anxiety peaks until I hear a voice. "Zak? Where are you?"

It's Darryl, groggy and sleep deprived. He had to answer for us when the police were here earlier, after he insisted on not waking me up.

The open cupboards in the bathroom suggest he thought about cleaning, then gave up. Some bottles of cleaning liquids are scattered around the small room, and I knock over a few as I frantically shut the door behind me.

"I'm fine. Just needed the bathroom" I choke out, trying and failing to keep my voice steady. It was trembling like crazy.

I back up against the door to stop Darryl from getting in incase he tries, resting my head against the damaged wood. The room is so dark I can barely see, but I don't want to turn on the light. Besides, it's out of reach.

I bring my legs up towards me,pressing them against my chest as I hug my knees for comfort. Tears roll down my face silently. I stare at the ceiling, willing them to stop.

"Zak I heard something fall. Twice. It sounded like it was you, are you ok?"

The once muffled voice becomes clearer as he approaches the room I'm in. I hear a light sigh, presumably because of me acting like this again. I've lost count of how many panic attacks I've had today.

Each one of those was small, resulting in me curling up into a ball and crying alone until I fall asleep again. Darryl didn't have to see those, he doesn't need to see this one.

But this one is so much worse...

Banging echoes through the apartment as the door shakes behind me. "Zak? Zak let me in. Open the door." I stretch out my legs, pushing them against the sink in an attempt to hold the door shut. The bathroom door opens inwards, and I duck out of the way to avoid being squished by it.

Darryl stands in the doorway, pushing a foot against the door incase I try to shut it again. His glasses are askew, deep purple circles under his eyes. Hair matted, bangs pressed against his forehead. He removes his glasses and rubs the sleep from his eyes, placing them back on askew.

"Zak what-" His eyes drift to the floor where I lay in a ball, rocking back and fort as I hold my head in my hands. I peer through my fingers, watching his face soften. "Oh Zak-" he mumbles sadly, kneeling beside me. Tears form in the corners of his eyes, and I remove his glasses to wipe them away. I'm so sick of crying, and watching the people I love cry.

I wrap my arms around the older boy's neck, resting my head on his shoulder. He picks me up, carrying me back into the main room.

Darryl sets me down in front of the large windows, reaching over me to turn on the lights.

They glow dimly in the late night, I can see my reflection in the windows. I have an appearance similar to Darryl's, but with more tear stains. That and Darryl looks cute still, like he just woke up. I look like I've been crying for hours.

Which if I add up the time spent crying today, probably equates to more than an hour...

There's shuffling around behind me, but I ignore it. I'm mesmerised by the stars outside, just like I always am. They don't show up as well in the dim lights.

As if by magic, I hear the 'click' of the light switch, sending us back into darkness. A faint glow of light still shines from the school campus surrounding us. I'm glad to not be able to see the room, the blood isn't noticeable in the shadows. It's like it isn't there.

Darryl comes to my side, tapping me lightly on the shoulder. "Here" he says gently, handing me a cup of hot chocolate.

(Do you Americans call it hot cocoa? Idk have my British substitute lol.)