One Shot Story

No.2 - Cool off

Magdamag lang akong nakatingin sa labas ng sasakyan, iinisip kung pano ko sasabihin lahat ng bumabagabag sa isip ko

"ella andito na tayo"drake said, i took a deep breath bago lumabas ng kotse

Napagpasiyahan ni drake na lumabas kami tutal ay wala rin naman siyang ginagawa at sobrang dalang nalang namin lumabas dahil sa tight schedule namin.
Pareho palang kaming nagaaral ni drake at parehong working students dahil di naman masyadong kaya ng parents nya yung tuition nya and ako naman ay ayokong inaasa nalang lagi sa parents ko lahat ng ginagastos ko sa school.

As I was looking at my sorrounding I see drake looking at me intently as if he was looking at a moon, I averted his gaze and started to walk.

Naramdaman kong inakbayan nya ko so i face him but he looked away like a child na ayaw umamin sa kasalanang nagawa

"Let's eat im hungry"I coldly said but I am actually nervous right now on how to tell him that I need space

"ella, may problema ba?"aniya, tinanggal nya ang pagkakaakbay sa akin at hinarap ako, I saw sadness in his face, ayoko rin gawin sakanya to pero kasi ito yung tama

"drake, lets cool off for now"i said and see if how he react on what I said mas lalo kong nakita yung lungkot, takot, at pangamba sa mukha nya na dahilan para iyuko na lamang ang ulo ko

"w-why?, wala naman tayong problema diba?"aniya

"yes we have drake"i said, hinawakan nya ang braso ko at tumingin saakin na parang sinasabi ng mga mata nya 'wag pls di ko kaya'

"m-may n-nagawa ba a-akong m-mali?, n-nasaktan b-ba k-kita?, a-anong p-problema n-natin?" sunod sunod nyang tanong na ngangatal dahil pinipigilan nya anf sarili nyang umiyak, I looked away di ko kayang makita syang ganito

"wala kang nagawa, di mo ko nasaktan, we need to cool off" I said without looking at his eyes, cause everytime i took a glance at his eyes I see the visibility of sadness in it...

5 months later

"drake, ano yung nakita ko? Bakit magkasama kayo ni natalie? Kaibigan ko pa?" I said looking at him intently with anger building inside off me

He stared at me coldly and said "lets break up" wait w-what? I froze hearing those words from him I felt pain in my chest para itong pinipiga at hindi ako makahinga

"w-why?" i said, my voice cracked as i asked him, pinipigilan kong wag umiyak sa harap nya dahil ayokong magmukhang nagkawawa sa harap nya

"ito naman yung gusto mo diba? pero di mo lang magawa dahil naawa ka kaya nakipag cool off ka nalang?"he said while still looking at me coldly, I slaped him as I hear those words coming from him

"Ang cool off para makapagisip hindi para magpahagip drake, nakipag cool off ako sayo para makapag concentrate tayo sa family, studies naten and sa mga gusto muna nating gawin nung time na yun." I said, tears started to fall in my eyes as I said those words, so in the first place ganun yung tingin nya kaya ko ginawa yun?

"I keep trying to reach you, I am making effort that time para lang um-okay ang lahat... bakit hindi mo nalang ako brinake?" tanong nya na ikinagulat ko, really? Bakit kailangan pang itanong yan? Ako ba yung sumuko?

"B-bakit?, kasi mahal kita drake"I said, pilit kong pinupunasan ang mga luha ko ngunit patuloy parin ito sa pagtulo, ang sakit isipin nang lahat ng ito

"ella alam mo bang ang unfair mo?,binitawan mo ko pero ayaw mong bumitaw ako, ayaw mo kong palayain, ayaw mo pero gusto mo ko, ang labo" he said looking at me intently na parang ipinamumukha nya na kasalanan ko ang lahat

"kaya ba nagawa mong lumandi sa iba?"I said, ang sakit isipin na ginawa ko lang yun para samin pero bakit ganito yung kinalabasan... Bakit??

"Hindi ako lumandi ella, yung babaeng yun nung panahon na iniwan mo ko sya yung nagmahal sakin, walang iba kundi si natalie" aniya, i get it kasalanan ko to ang tanga ko pero alam kong makakabuti samin yung ganon... Para samin rin naman yon, kaya ko ginawa yon para hindi sya masakal sakin pero di ko namalayan  na nabitawan ko sya.

"were over ella"he said and started walking away from me I saw him walking towards to natalie with a big smile on his lips he hugged natalie tight as if he doesnt want to be apart on her, I smiled bitterly seeing him happy with another girl 'that should be me' words that came out from my head, I wiped my tears and smile as if nothing happened, I turned my back to him and started to walk in different path

Because of the thought na ayaw ko syang masakal sa pagkakahawak ko sakanya di ko alam na sobrang luwag na pala ng pagkakahawak ko sakanya dahilan para maagaw sya ng iba ng di ko namamalayan, yes it hurts so much for now pero kailangan ko na syang pakawalan dahil ako rin ang masasaktan kapag pinagpatuloy ko pa, hindi naman kasi porket mahal mo,ipaglalaban mo na hanggang dulo if he's not happy with you, give him freedom because love is not only to fight but also to surrender

Totoo pala yung sabi nila na kapag lumabas ka ng pinto siguraduhin mong may ibang makakapasok dyan at kapag may ibang nakapasok dyan umasa ka nalang na sana tanggapin ka pa uli...