Sirens | An AMC'S Turn: Washington's Spies Fan Fiction

Nine

As Ben thought his way to exhaustion, he caught the sound of footsteps outside of the cottage. Light steps on fallen leaves made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. Ben carefully grabbed his pistol and aimed it at the door, his heart beating wildly in his chest in anticipation for what stood outside. But then, the door burst open and a wayward figure stumbled inside, tripping on the threshold and slamming their body against the wooden floor.

"Christ!" A familiar voice rang out into the silence. Ben felt a lump form in his throat. Before he could think it through, he jumped out of his chair and went to the figure lying crookedly on the floor before him.

"Get your filthy hands off of-" The voice stopped mid-sentence. Ben looked at the figure's face and realization dawned on him. It couldn't be...

-

Liza choked as she tumbled to the floor. She let out every curse she could think of before a figure suddenly grabbed at her coat.

It...it couldn't be. It was....Benjamin.

Both of them paused in shock, unsure how to greet each other. Benjamin ran his thumb across Liza's cheek as tears began to fall from his eyes. Liza wanted to cry as well, but it was almost like she forgot how. Instead, she shrugged off his hand from her coat and got up slowly, remaining seated on the floor below where Benjamin had been sitting.

"I have been looking everywhere for you, Liza," he breathed. Tears still ran down his cheeks and again, Liza had to muster all of her strength not to reach out and dry them. She was torn between relief and absolute hatred. Why would he look for her? Did he not understand that she did not want to be saved?

"Why?" was all she could get herself to say. Her heart broke when Benjamin's face fell. She hated hurting him, but it was the only way to protect him from the monster she had become - she had to get him to hate her in order to be left alone. She couldn't face him after all she'd done and all she still had left to do.

"You must know why-"

"No, I'm afraid I don't. We are not betrothed. We are nothing more than friends. You should have left me to do what I must. It is no use convincing me to return to Setauket for I will not go."

Liza watched as Benjamin swallowed the last of his tears and shook his head in unbelief. The air around them turned cold and both shivered as they faced each other.

"I'm so sorry that you have been through hell, Liza."

Liza laughed a mechanical laugh that surprised even herself. It sounded empty and...dark. Full of anger and bitterness.

"Liza-"

"I do not need your sympathy, Benjamin," she spat. "I suffered for this Cause. Not for you."

-

Liza was not the Liza Ben knew a month ago. She changed. Her laugh carried so much bitterness and her eyes were heavy and sad. And she was no longer quiet and careful with her words, but instead used each one as a weapon. Ben had to admit that she had impeccable aim. Still, he could not comprehend her coldness towards him. She had suffered greatly and it had made her unrecognizable. Ben grabbed onto anything he could, gripping it tightly until his knuckles were white. He wanted any piece of her, to know she was real and was alive in front of him, that this wasn't just a feverish dream.

"Liza, I know you did not suffer for me and I wouldn't ask you to do that."

Ben watched as Liza's face remained stoic and cold. She looked so small and thin the very breeze outside could knock her over. He couldn't explain how painful it was to see her like this...so broken and so very determined to look otherwise.

"Everyone has been looking for you-"

"And you think I care?" Liza screamed, setting Ben's nerves on edge. Sarah Livingston was sleeping in the other room and would surely awaken at any moment. He could not explain that situation to the enraged woman standing before him.

"Please, Liza. Just listen. Everyone thought you were...I thought you were...dead. Do you know the hell you put us through? Do you?! Running away from us will not bring them back."

Ben couldn't contain his frustration any longer, but it dissipated when he saw the tears fall down Liza's cheeks.

-

Liza couldn't hold it in. The tears came hot and full as a summer rain shower, determined to soak anything in its path. She knew her revenge plan would not bring her father and brothers back to life, but she thought it would at least make her feel a semblance of peace. She knew deep down that it was a futile mission. She knew how many people she had hurt and killed in the process of avenging her family's death. She hated the fact that others had hurt because of her. It was worse than anything in the world.

"Ben-" She began before her tears turned into sobs. They wracked her entire frame until she was heaps on the floor, clutching to the floorboards to steady herself.  Liza was so incredibly lost in her own brokenness that she did not notice a woman enter the kitchen, glaring at the scene before her.

A/N: Hello all! I know it has been a bit and change since I've uploaded a chapter for Sirens. To be honest, it is hard to find inspiration to continue writing this story sometimes. I adore Liza and Ben and I know their story is not finished, so I will continue as long as I have the ability and time to do so. I am also aware that the current state of the world is less than ideal. We are stuck in our homes and many of us are struggling with anxiety and fear of this new normal. If my story can be an avenue through which you can find peace, that is an honor. I am also in the process of writing an original romance story that I will be sharing soon. And finally, I would LOVE a playlist for Sirens. I have one that I listen to while I write, but I know there are so many creative people who read Sirens and can make one as well. Please leave a comment if you're interested!

Stay safe and healthy, loves.

Xo