2:an unsettling discovery

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X.. doesn't get mad.
They tried not to, at the very least.
Afterall, when you're X there's so little to be mad about. When you're X, you had Four. And that was all that mattered. But.. It's not like that now.

X had visited Four on numerous occasions, believe it or not. But it wasn't the same, nono. Definitely not.
They were happy in being Four's cohost. But more importantly they were most content in being Four's friend.

Why wasn't this enough?

.. Admittedly, Four didn't know.. everything, about X.
And X themself had certainly made sure of that fact. Not that X had tons and tons of secrets, it was just particular things about the variable would be- too much so to speak.

We settle in, seeing X standing in the black, charred grass with a needless to say, panicked expression across their face.
. . .

The variable stared wide eyed into the little broken yellow mirror, a hand over their mouth in shock-.. This doesn't normally happen. Not now, not ever.

They stared at the numbers in their pupils, puzzled..

They felt the stinging of tears in their eyes as they stared at themself, horrified in what they'd see in the reflection. They whimpered softly, staring at the mirror before hastily tossing it to the ground, rubbing their eyes quick before-
Before Two got back.
They'd step over to the Variable, smiling a bit with a hint of concern in their eyes..

" Four was asking about you. "

They piped up, a hand rested on their side.. X stared back, quickly rubbing the tears out of their eyes with an elbow..
" OH! Did he, uh, want me to come visit again? " They'd rub their eyes again, hoping it had went away.

Two thumbled with their chin. " Well, they said they didn't want to bother you if you're busy. He just told me tell you he misses you! "
Two smiled, and X beamed a little at the thought, his eyes now fully returned to their natural color..

" Thank you for telling me, Two!! "
X responded happily, pawing their hands together. Two nodded.
" Alroighty then X, you're free to leave anytime you want, alright? I've got some host things to be doing. You know how it is! "
The brit laughed boldly, waving to the variable and going right back off to their business..

X stared, and turned away, sighing and quickly picking up one of the mirror's shards, seeing their eyes had reverted.
" Phew.. "

X tried to block away all of the memories. So now, everything just felt.. fuzzy. In regards to what happened.
The incident, so to speak. Happened twice.. With everything blocked out, it was pretty hard for the variable to figure out what to do about this. This is a secret they can't dare tell either of his host friends. And most importantly,
he can't tell Four.
Who knows how they'd react?

W-Would Four even want to be their friend anynore? No. No, X can't possibly lose that. When you're X, you have Four. And Four has you. And everything is supposed to be perfect, and happy, and nothing bad was ever supposed to happen. Nothing was ever supposed to get in the way, right?

X wheezed.
It seems that they'll have to consult.. a very dusty old book for awnsers.

________________

After a long while of sifting through old belongings ( Four had an awful unicycle phase and that made the pile 20 times harder to look through ) X had managed to find the little pink book. It was small, and had little stitchings of flowers on the cover. Though- very worn down, the occasional stain here and there. X smiled at the sight, reminiscing on the little book. It was a gift from Four, afterall. And they knew him so well. They sigh dreamily, cupping a hand to the side of their face.

Alas.

Their smile dropped when they remembered what was in it, though. They'd push bash the icky feeling rising in their throat, inspecting the diary's rosy pink tattered spine and the fact it still smelled like crayons because Four's bag was just. Filled with nothing but crayons for the longest time. This would've been fine if they were kids but they were fairly far into their teenage years, at that point. X shook their head quickly, trying to focus on the task at hand..

It was time to face this horrible, awful, no good thing. This time, from the very beginning.

X opened the diary.

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