Ain't No Sharing You

Throw Ya Hands Up!

I was still sitting in the car outside of the hospital when I saw Brandon and Will go inside. As much as I want to hate him I can't. I hate what he did to us, to me. Just as I was about to pull off I saw Trent calling me again.

"I'm on my way," I said and ended the call not giving him a chance to say anything.

Once I got to the house I didn't even want to go in because I knew I was about to get a lecture from Trent. Honestly, I was glad that I went to the hospital. It gave me a lot of insight as to why Brandon and Will acted that way. No excuses for their behavior, but now I kind of understand the reasoning.

"Hey," I said closing the front door and taking off my black riding boots.

"Bre, thanks for letting me use your car." I said placing the keys in her hand.

"Did you see him?" She asked squinting her eyes at me.

"Brandon? No."

"Camille," Trent said, "I need to know what you're going to do."

"Do about what?" I asked looking from him to Bre.

I already knew where this conversation was headed, but it was a conversation I wasn't ready for.

"Ok. No sugar coating. Are you leaving Brandon? I'm not about to play this game of back and forth, Trent come save me."

"I'm not asking you to play a game. He's my husband, not a boyfriend I can just walk away from."

"Look," Bre said grabbing her purse so that she could leave. "What we're trying to say is let's pray that the next time you call Trent for help you're alive and not on the way to the morgue."

With that she left and Trent went to his room. That night I went to my room and had the most sincere conversation with God in a long time. Only His direction would get me though this. I cried and asked God to give me a sign. Do I fight for my marriage or do I let it go? My love for that man overshadowed my love for everything else, including God. Brandon become my god and as much as I wanted my life back, I wanted Brandon back too. I guess that's exactly what Daddy Grant was talking about; being weak. I needed the Lord to provide me with strength.

It was Sunday morning and we were headed to a much needed worship service. One of Trent's frat brothers invited him to church and we decided that we would visit. As soon as we got to the church my phone went off.

"Hello" I answered once I saw Ash's face on the screen.

"Camille, he's gone" the voice whispered.

"Brandon?" I asked with my face scrunched up in confusion.

"Camille, please? I can't do this without you."

I immediately hung up the phone and wiped the tears that fell from my eyes.

"What happened Mimi?" Trent asked putting his Red Bull down and grabbing my hand.

"Brandon wanted me to know that his father passed away and he needs me" I said pulling the sun visor down so that I could fix my make up.

"So what do you want to do?" He asked me.

"We're going inside. People die everyday. He'll still be dead after service is over."

"Camille! That's bit harsh don't you think?"

"Yep. Just as harsh as Brandon telling me my miscarriage on the bathroom floor wasn't "important enough" for him to reschedule a meeting" I said grabbing my Ray Bans and flipping the visor back up.

"I'm not rescheduling my worship." I grabbed my bible and got out of the car and made my way towards the entrance.

The service was just what I needed. Praise and worship was phenomenal, but the sermon is what got to me.