Diary of the Mistress

Chapter II | TWO

Diary of the Mistress

Chapter II

I’ve become the woman I despise, the other woman. I lay in bed late at night wishing that he was next to me. Wishing that his strong arms were wrapped around me, his warm breath hitting the back of my neck as he peacefully slumbers. My heart aches when the thought of what he could be doing surfaces into my sleep deprived mind. What they could be doing.

The cold New York air seeped through the tiny crack at the bottom of the window, goose bumps forming across my body. Another sleepless night; millions of thoughts racing in my head. During those early hours of the morning he seemed to be the only thing to occupy my mind, mostly because that’s when I was the loneliest. This big house and no one to share it with.

She has my life, everything I want. I watch in envy as she flaunts him and their family around town, that should be me. I listen as he promises that someday we will be together, hoping that he is being honest with me. I cling onto his every word, being that’s the only thing I have. I never dare to ask him when though, knowing that he will feed me the same lines of ‘I can’t leave her just yet.” Or “What about the boys?”.

What about me? He doesn’t want to hurt them, yet he continues to shatter my heart into tiny pieces. You would think that would be enough for me to stop this, whatever it is we have. But it’s not, I’m in too deep. Too many emotions are involved to just walk away now. He has my heart and I don’t want it back. I hated how she could have him whenever she wanted and our love had to be hidden. Confined to four walls, our sweet words nothing but a whisper, but loud enough to sink into my mind forever. The small kisses that we would exchange when alone, the occasional touching of fingers, those small things are what I appreciated the most.

You will never understand what it’s like to be the other woman, until you actually are her.

I sat in the backseat of the yellow taxi, traffic hectic as usual. I adjusted the large sunglasses over my eyes while staring out the window, watching as pedestrians rushed to work as well. Glancing over at the clock radio, I hadn’t noticed how late it was, my heart skipping a beat as I realized I wouldn't be arriving on time...to see him. Lifting up, I pulled my phone from my back pocket, adjusting in the leather seat as I unlocked the screen.

To: Abe

Sent: 8:43 AM

Going to be a little late…traffic is super crazy.

I surrendered back into my seat, watching as the taxi meter increased by the second. My phone vibrated in my hand, indicating a new text message. Looking down, I felt my cheeks turn red, my face growing hot as I saw his name.

From: Abe

Received: 8:44 AM

Take your time, baby. I’ll be here ;-)

Biting down on my bottom lip, I slid my phone into the small pockets on my jacket, looking up to see my building with butterflies fluttering throughout my stomach. After paying the taxi driver, I slid out of the car and slammed the door shut behind me, my hands clutching tight onto the leather strap attached to my bag that was across my chest, my purse bumping into my knee as I ran up the small case of concrete stairs.

“Morning, John.” I greeted the door man as I walked into the building, him returning his normal smile and nod.

Resting my hand on the elevator button, I couldn’t help but blush thinking of what took place in this exact spot less than 24 hours ago. Once the doors opened up, I walked inside and let them slide shut, staring at myself through the mirror. My heart began to race in my chest as I inched closer to our floor, closer to him. I pressed my lips together; double checking my lipstick was before stepping out of the cart.