~ Always Besides You ~

5. Fratello

"He was in pain Swara, he was hurt, was screaming and behaving like a maniac. I couldn't do anything else... I.." She hugged Swara, unable to finish her words and whispered numerous Sorry amidst her sniffling.

"Look Shona, I'll talk to Pappa. You don't worry, okay. I'll make him conduct both of your marriage. Don't get distressed on this matter. He knows the value of love and sacrifice. He won't make you guys live away from your love. So you don't...."

Swara instantly hugged Ragini to stop her from her frantic blabber. Ragini shut her eyes tightly as she bit her lower lip controlling her whimper.

"Stop Meri Ma... You don't have to lose anything for me again Ragini. Please, not this time. I know, you love Laksh more than anyone. Then all those happened. Now you're married Ragu. It's not a game. We can't just play it. Maybe destiny had yours togetherness!" Swara told wiping her tears and held Ragini's hand, passing a smile which didn't reach her eyes.

"I know Swara, marriage is not a game and you know that I respect relations to the extreme. But marriage can't be complete without love and the truth is Laksh loves you. Moreover, I don't want to be in a forced relation like my Maa and Papa." A lone tear escaped from her eyes.

"Ragu!"

"History has repeated Swara. Papa loved Mishti Maa but had to marry Janki Maa. What was the outcome? All three had to live life of misery and pain. It took 20 years for them, Swara! 20 years... And now.... Laksh loves you but married me. Same, right? The only difference is circumstances. I can't live this life for decades Swara. I can't live dying every single day." Ragini sighed as she glanced around, taking the rein of her emotions. "Now, the matter can be handled, in fact, in a better manner. And Ms. Shona, let me tell you, I won't lose anything. In fact, I will be free from this suffocation. Everything was so overwhelming for me. Let me live freely without any strigs attached. The Ragini who dreamt of a novel love story is long gone. Actually, I'm free now. After your wedding, everything will be perfect." Ragini said contented.

"You love him Ragini!" Swara reminded her, her brows etched into a frown; her voice held exasperation.

"You love him!" Ragini asserted. "I used to love him. Yeah, I can't say that I don't love him anymore. It won't vanish in this air so easily but you know, now I feel having the control over feelings towards him. You are his love Swara. And I love U! You know that right.." She looked at Swara, expecting her to understand her words "Don't think that I'm being a mahaan behena by sacrificing my love. I told you I'm doing this for myself. This is the right thing Swara. I'm sure about what I'm doing." Ragini pressed Swara's hand assuring her, a convincing smile adorning her lips, her eyes held plea.

"It's too late to backout." Swara said shaking her heads. "Be serious. You're Ragini! You're not the one to backout from a pious relation like marriage. You're daughter-in-law of that house. It's not right. Don't make me feel selfish, Ragu. I won't be able to smile freely if your heart breaks because of me anymore. I had done it once already, not anymore!"

Ragini let out a shaky breath, a tear rolled down her cheek. "I... I want to smile, Swara. I want to scream out of happiness. I want to love limitlessly. I want to have a friend, who always supports me, corrects me. I want to be free. I want to giggle in happiness, blush in love and squeal in excitement. I want to tease someone without any hesitation. I want to marry a person who will understand me, trust me, respect me. I want my sister, to back me in my every decision, without any regret or guilt. I want our parents to be proud of me, happy of my life and content with my married life. I want our grand parent to gush over our life equally, shower us with blessings on every step of our life and pamper us and our husbands with all they have." Her voice turned from cracky and dejected to dreamy and hopeful as she let out her mind. "This is not the end of my life. When I faced this situation, I realised how small I always used to dream. I used to just think about being a good wife and daughter-in-law forgetting about myself. I don't want to change myself but I want to change the ways of my life; I want to explore and bring forth myself."