resurrect | h.s

part twenty nine

She shifts on the couch because of my silence. "D-do you like it?"

"I love it." I shake my head. I couldn't even fathom how much I loved her.

Her lips pull into a tiny smile. "You do?"

I nod and immediately pull her in to me tight. "Thank you, baby."

I pull away and look back down at the ring. Lydia delicately slides it out of the box and onto my ring finger on my right hand. It sat above another one of my rings.

"Perfect." she says with a grin.

"When did you get this?" I ask out of curiosity.

"This old woman I work with has a sort of passion for making jewelry. I told her I wanted to get you something special and then I showed her my ring. She made it and gave it to me like a week ago." she explains, looking down at her hands at the ring on her finger.

I examine the ring among the many other rings on my hand. The craftsmanship was impressive.

I had something that to give her as well. It was something that I had some trouble obtaining, because I've never done this stuff before. The gift I got was sort of for both of us...but I really bought it for her because I know it would mean a lot.

"Well, it seems that we've both broken the 'no gifts' rule, White." I say smugly, making her take a sharp breath in and squint her eyes in judgement, playful judgment.

"You're something else." she shakes her head.

I chuckle and hop off the couch. "Close your eyes."

She smiles and covers her eyes with her hands.

I get up and rush to this spare closet in the hallway that we never use. I put my gift in there because I knew it wouldn't get found.

So, that brings me back to what the gift is. I felt kinda stupid, because I'm not familiar—nor am I good—with these sorts of things...however, I'm going to use this thing in particular as my 'training wheels' for the future. Sounds dumb, I know.

I got us a car seat. For the baby.

It wasn't an impulsive decision at all. I actually thought it through for a really long time. I figured that putting the seat in the back of the car before the baby arrives will help us with getting used to having that presence in the back seat.

It seems like something that should be so simple...but for us, it just isn't. We have to changeable adjust our whole lives in order to welcome a baby.

I bring the large box back to the living room, planting it in front of Lydia. I didn't have time to wrap it, so that's why I had her close her eyes.

"Okay. Open." I direct, sitting down next to her.

She takes her hands away from her eyes, slowly opening them right after.

Once she sees what's in front of her, her eyes widen and her mouth drops open.

"Harry, oh my god." she says.

I couldn't really read her reaction. I couldn't tell if she was excited or not.

"I know it's kind of stupid...but I think it'll be good for us to-"

"Stop. It's perfect. I love it." she says, looking at the picture of the carseat on the box.

"Oh thank god." I exhale a breath of relief.

"I know you might not show it as much as me..." she starts, swinging her legs over mine and lifting herself up so that she was now straddling me. "...but I can tell that you're really excited about this baby." she gleams a toothy smile.

"I'm excited to have a baby with you. I wouldn't want it to be with anyone else." I say, looking up at her as she sat on my lap, her hands on my shoulders.

Truth is, if it wasn't Lydia having my baby...I wouldn't want it. It might sound bad, but she's the only person on the planet who has even caused me to consider starting a family outside of my gang lifestyle.

And also, if this baby is going to be anything like Lydia, then that'll be a whole other blessing in itself.

"Do you ever think about how they're gonna turn out? Like one day they're going to grow up and be their own person...with their own personality." I say.

She pulls her lips to the side with a small grin. "They're gonna be great. I know it."

I sigh, and look down at her stomach. "I'm just worried they'll end up like me, some damaged psycho."

She grabs my face, making me look back up at her eyes. "Hey, dont say that." she says seriously. "You weren't born damaged. You were made that way by people who didn't deserve to have you." she explains. "I know you, Harry. You're an incredible human being and I wouldn't change you for the world."

A corner of my mouth lifted while my eyes glistened at the sight of her. My ears tingled at the sound of her soft, soothing voice telling me I was worth it.

She thought I was worth it.

"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me." I whisper, squeezing her hips.

She threads a hand through my hair. "I love you, Harry Styles."

She brings her face in close and connects her lips with mine. I take in every moment of her soft mouth meeting mine. She was intoxicating and enchanting. She was so surreal that she made me feel like I was constantly living a dream.

I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I just don't know how to tell her that.

I've never thought of marriage as an option in my life. I've never met anyone who made me want to devote my entire life to them. Except Lydia.

I'd marry Lydia.

//

:,)