Wanderlust ✓

34. Cracked

"I am a distraction, Carly. And I messed up so badly with you. How could I leave my best friend in the dust? I'm awful! I'm an awful person!" The tears started coming back.

"Shhh," she pulled me up into a sitting position and enveloped me into a hug. "You're a beautiful, kind, generous person. Okay? I don't want you saying those things about yourself. I've had time to think about what happened and I wholeheartedly forgive you. You didn't forget about me on purpose or even forget about me at all. You were just captivated by your first love. I can't be angry or jealous about that." I hugged her tighter, not letting go just yet.

"And with time for Parker, he'll come to his realizations," she continued, "I don't know exactly what happened and I'm sure you'll tell me when you're in the right mindset but what I do know is that he loves you."

We finally pulled away and sat there on the floor in my entry way in comfortable silence.

"Can you help me get to bed now? And maybe find me some tissues? And ice cream?" I asked, which both resulted in us laughing as Carly helped get me off the floor.

•••

"Oh! Hi Carly. I didn't know you spent the night," mom said as we walked into the kitchen the next morning. She had just set down pancakes on the table.

"Yeah, sorry. I came in late," She replied as I pulled back a chair to sit across from Carter and Carly did the same next to me.

"No worries, sweetie. I'm happy you're here, I haven't seen you around in quite a while."

We both grimaced. "I've been pretty busy."

"She's here now, isn't she?" I said cheerfully. "Can we eat now?"

"Please! Before it gets cold. I'm just gonna wake up your dad." My mom disappeared from the kitchen, leaving just the three of us in silence until Carter spoke up.

"Okay, let's cut to the chase. Carly obviously hasn't been here because you two had some sort of fight. Then, I heard you crying in your room last night when I got home so something must've happened with Parker which is why Carly came to the rescue. Now, I don't wanna hear about anything that's going on because I just don't care. You two can gossip all you want as I finish my breakfast in peace in my room. Goodbye." His chair scrapped back and in the blink of an eye he was gone.

I looked over at Carly and we burst out laughing. We ate in silence, just enjoying the comfort of being together again. Weeks separated yet it feels as though nothing has changed. There was still a lingering of awkward tension in the air but over time it should heal. Hopefully.

•••

I have to tell mom...

That was the only thought in my head as I procrastinated my homework the next day. I couldn't work up the courage yesterday to tell my mom what happened with Parker after Carly left. I tried and tried and tried but it just didn't happen. I think I was almost ashamed of what happened, still thinking that what he said was true (even after the multiple reassurances from Carly).

But today is the day! She's going to start wondering why I'm cooped up in my room and why Parker isn't picking me up today because there's never a weekend that passes without him doing so.

Just gotta work up the courage!

I know I can find her in the kitchen. Sunday's are her baking days. So I rolled myself out of bed and shuffled my way down the stairs. As I entered the kitchen, I could smell the aroma of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies and there was my mom, bending down to pull them out of the oven.

"Hey mom," I said quietly, taking a seat at the counter in front of her.

"Hey honey, what were you up to?" She asked, setting the cookie tray down to cool and took the oven mitts off. She was still in her bright pink apron.

"Homework," my voice came out flat and I started to bite my nails, a nervous habit.

"Something's wrong. Tell me what's wrong, Paige." She pulled out the stool next to me and grabbed my hands to make me look up.

My eyes couldn't hold hers. "Um well something happened with Parker friday night. I-I don't know exactly what we are now cause I think he broke up with me or like we're on a break or something?" It came out more like a question than a statement but as soon as it came out she pulled me into a hug.

"Oh baby! Why didn't you tell me yesterday?" She spoke to me softly. I sighed.

"I'm still trying to figure out what happened myself and I'm pretty sad about it-"

"Of course you are! You're still healing so you don't have to tell me any more." I nodded sadly.

"I've got just the thing to help!" She jumped up. "I'll be right back."

And within two minutes she was back on the chair in front of me, now with something in her hand.

"I bought these at the farmer's market a few months ago and the lady explained to me what they do," she opened up her palm to reveal three small pink rocks, "These are healing quartz crystals that are supposed to relieve stress, frustration and anxiety. I give them a squeeze when I feel that way and they have seemed to work. Maybe they'll help you too."

Fucking crystals. She has lost her goddamn mind.

But she seemed so hopeful looking at me and pushing them towards me that I couldn't say no. I couldn't burst her bubble, I mean it's the thought that counts.

I held out my palm as she dropped them in. "Thanks, mom."

"It'll all get better soon, Paigey. He'll come around to his senses." Just as everyone has been saying.