Hoarding

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I have a small confession to make. I am a hoarder.

Yes, I hoard things. Not the 'lets collect the plastic water bottles' type - the environmentalist; or the 'lets save the gift wrapper to be re-used' type - the frugal; nor the 'lets keep the movie ticket in a book' type - the sentimentalist.

I am the worst type - the contingency planner. The 'what if' type. "What if I need it later?", "What if I need it for parts?" , "What if someone needs it one day?", "What if my 18 other survival knives don't work?"

Bad as it sounds, I am not the top dog. That distinction goes to an old pal of mine. He is the undisputed Heavy Weight Hoarding Champion of the World. A plane crash site is more liveable than his apartment.

That was last month, before we ushered in the new year. He decided to throw away some of his stuff and tidy his place up. At least someone is keeping to his Vision 2020.

He had a bit of an early start. He started at around Christmas Holidays. Worked at it through the New Year, the Chinese New Year Holidays and every weekend. He is almost there, he tells me. It's February now. Give him time. His is a work in progress.

He brought a pair binoculars for last weekend's hike. The ones that were ubiquitous about quarter of a century ago; when the Soviet Union was falling apart and they were selling all those fake 'Soviet Army Surplus' stuff at night markets.

I asked him what was that about and he replied "Oh, I just found it when I was cleaning up and brought it to show it to you."

"Ahh, I have pair just like that. Don't know where it is. Must be in the house somewhere" I said.

"You know Muru, I came across some of the mails that Melanie sent me when we were in college" he said. Those were real mails, written in ink on paper, mind you.

Melanie is my friend's ex-wife and that's not her real name by the way.

"I read them and tears just rolled down my cheeks. So much love... Don't know what happened to us" he said in a soft voice.

Not knowing what to say I looked down and kept quiet, for a while.

"You know, we collect stuff, always thinking there is a use for it sometime but you can never find it when you need it." I said, going off on a tangent.

"Oh, I do find my stuff when I need it," he said, hitting the breaks at my attempt.

"You know Muru, the thing is, we collect all that stuff, so much so that the things that really matter to us are hidden in that heap, virtually lost to us" he said.

He is right.

Nisargadatta Maharaj, a spiritual guru was once asked by a student, "Maharaj, you are so full of love and peace all the time. Why can't I have that?"

The Guru replied "The love and peace that's in me is in you too. It is in every living thing."

"Why then, you feel it all time but I can't?" asked the student.

"It is because I only have love and peace" said the Guru.

We carry so many things in our minds. We carry a little bit of love, a little bit of envy, a little bit of kindness, a little bit of hatred, a little bit this and a little bit of that.

We carry a little bit of everything so much so that the good we carry is lost in the pile. We allow our mind to become the passive repository of everything imagined, literally.

Time to throw some of my stuff and tidy up my place. And the mind too.

Thanks pal.

Muru

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