Troyler - Missing Moments

Realize

Tumblr prompt: Send me a "Realize" and I'll write a drabble about one character realizing they love the other

I wasn't entirely sure that it meant to be in love. At 19, I had experienced a lot of amazing things, but love had not been one of them. People always told me that when it was love I would just know it. I wouldn't need the silly online quizzes or cliche tumblr posts to tell me, I would just know.

Another question in my mind was when would I know. The movies and books always made it seem like you would know when you kissed the person. The sad stories always said you would know when you lose the other person. There were also the cliche fanfiction ideas that it would be jealousy that would bring the feelings to light. For all I knew, love at first sight may have been possible as well. Still at 19 none of these moments had happened to me, but I was that when I figured it out, it would be in one of those ways.

People were right about one thing, when I did realize that I was in love I didn't need any cheesy quotes or silly quizzes to tell me so, I just knew. I knew that I was in love, I was as sure of it as I was that my name ended in an 'e' and that I loved music. What I didn't expect was that there was no cliche moment or cheesy situation that made me realize it. 

I was in LA, again, working on music and spending some time with friends when I could. I always seemed to find time to hand out with Connor, but things were harder when it came to Tyler. Between both of our busy schedules we never manged to be able to spend enough time together. Granted, I didn't think any amount of time would qualify as "enough". 

Tyler had been recording his podcast with Korey all day while I was in the studio, focusing on writing. Tyler had joked that he got to see more of me through Skype while I was in Australia the night before so today we had both decided to have some take out and catch up a bit. 

Tyler sent an uber to pick me up from the studio and I arrived at the same time as the delivery man came. I quickly paid for the order outside the door before the man had a chance to knock and knocked on the door myself.

"Who is it?" Tyler called from inside, his voice showing how exhausted he was.

"Delivery boy." I called back with a slight smirk, grinning when he opened the door.

"This is like out of some lame porno." Was Tyler's reply after he opened the door and saw me standing with the food. "Cute little Twink bottom comes to deliver food and gets fucked," he joked, laughing at his own joke while I rolled my eyes.

"Shut up, Tyler." I said, my amusement evident in my voice no matter how I tried to hide it. I pushed past him and walked into the familiar apartment. I kicked off my shoes and started opening up the bag, grinning when I saw that Tyler had ordered all of my favorites.

"How was your day?" I said as Tyler walked into the kitchen, going to grab utensils.

"Long." He said, dropping down on to the floor across from me as he started opening containers and eating. We stayed silent while we ate, both of us giving all of our attention to the food in front of us. Tyler finished before me and laid down on the floor on his stomach, groaning slightly as he stretched out.

"Why did you tell me to still come over if you were so tired?" I asked while finishing up the rest of my food. I put the container down and grabbed my phone, deciding that a picture of this needed to go on twitter.

"Because I wanted to see you obviously, god could you even pretend like you want to see me?" He sassed, clearly joking which just earned him another eye roll.

"I'm here aren't I? Clearly I wanted to see you as well no matter how much today sucked." I answered, flipping through the few photos I took before deciding on one.

"What happened?" Tyler questioned, resting his head on his arms while he gazed at me.

"I just couldn't get the sound in my head on paper you know? Like I can hear it so clearly but just can't seem to translate it." I replied, mumbling my words slightly from embarrassment. It wasn't an entirely new problem I had, in fact it's something Tyler's heard me whine about loads of times at this point.

"I know babe, but you always get it in the end. Remember how long Touch took you? And it turned out wonderfully! Still my favorite track." He reassured me, nodding his head in agreement when I showed him the draft of my tweet.

I decided not to respond and just posted the picture on twitter, laughing softly as the fans started going crazy over such a little thing. After watching the replies for a few seconds I put my phone down and gazed over at Tyler, and that's when it hit me.

There he was, exhausted after a long day of work, eyes closed as he fell asleep on the floor. Here I was ready to fall asleep next to him. Both of us would have been better off if I had just gone straight to my hotel where I could have gone to bed and Tyler wouldn't have had to worry about me getting back. Still, there was no where else I would rather have been then here at this very moment.

No matter what kind of day I had or how emotionally drained I was, at the end of the night I wanted to be here with Tyler. The feeling wasn't an uncommon one, nor something I felt the first time. There were the countless Skype calls where one of us would be falling asleep where I would just wish we were closer. Or the times when I was mad at the world and didn't want to talk to anyone, Tyler always seemed to be the exception to the rule.

There was something different about the feeling this time though, I finally understood what it meant. I was in love with him and no matter the day wither of us had, there was no where else in the world I would rather be then near him.