You And I ( Slow Updates )

I Don't Need Another...

Kelsey

I was too busy thinking of ways to tell you that the condom broke...

So from now on out, if all you want is sex then we'll do that...

The condom broke?

I'm not on birth control. I've never had a reason to be. I didn't get my tubes tied after having Taylor because I did plan on having more children, but not like this. Not with someone as immature as August.

And having sex with him every now and then wouldn't be a problem. Would it? There would be no emotions attached and it would be just sex.

Oh who am I kidding? Those things never work out. One person always ends up falling in love with the other and I did not want to be that person.

But the sex was just too good to pass up.

I groaned as I rolled over and squeezed the pillow tighter. I had placed it between my legs to stop my vagina from aching for August, but it wasn't helping. I looked over at the clock that blared 1:42 AM. I had officially been in bed thinking about him for three hours.

How could I hate someone but want them at the same time?

Frustrated, I threw the pillow across the room and got out of bed. I threw a robe over my t-shirt covered body, one that I had stolen from August, and put on my slippers before silently making my way into the kitchen.

I grabbed a cup from the cabinet and filled it with water . I sat the bottle down and leaned my back against the counter

I had closed my eyes to enjoy the feel of the water sliding down my throat when I heard the fridge door open. I looked up to see August searching through the fridge. He settled on a bottle of water before turning his attention to me.

We sat there in silence. Both drinking our beverages and just staring at the other. There were a couple of times where I wanted to snatch the cup from his hand and replace it with my lips, but I honestly didn't know where our relationship stood.

If there even was a relationship.

You can't form a relationship with just sex, so like I said, I didn't know where we stood.

Too caught up in my own thoughts, I hadn't noticed that he'd finished his bottle of water and had successfully thrown it in the trash before coming to stand in front of me. I carefully sat my empty glass down as he used one of his hands to tuck my hair behind my ear and the other to pull my body against his.

Already knowing where this was going, I pushed him away and slowly undid my robe before dropping it to the floor. I stepped out of my slippers and the next thing to go was the shirt.

I stood there completely naked as his eyes trailed from my feet all the way up to meet mine. I pulled him closer by his belt buckle and undid it before unzipping his pants and watched them fall to the floor.

He grabbed me by my waist and sat me on the counter. His boxers dropped to the floor and without warning, he plunged his dick inside me.

I gasped and dug my nails into his back. He didn't say a word as he continued to pound in and out of me; mercilessly.

For a minute I felt like he was using me. He had yet to kiss me and it was starting to bother me. Not to the point where I couldn't enjoy the incredible sex we were having right now, but because it made this encounter feel a lot more straight forward than it should've been.

I guess he was serious about this just being a sex thing between us because once we had both successfully squeezed the last amount of pleasure out of ourselves, he grabbed his things and disappeared somewhere down the hallway.

He never even said a word to me. He didn't kiss me and he didn't even try to drag it out a little longer. And though it was yet another amazing sex experience it left me feeling...empty...used...unappreciated.

But sex was the only thing I wanted right?

I stepped down from the counter and grabbed my clothes from the floor before sliding off to my bedroom where I quickly took a shower.

The next morning, I woke up to one of the most delicious smells ever. Food.

I grabbed my robe and went to brush my teeth and wash my face before sliding on my slippers and walking out to the kitchen to find Payton cooking breakfast and humming to herself. Just like my mom would be doing.

"This kitchen hasn't been cooked in since I moved here a few months ago."

She jumped and turned to me as I took my seat at the island bar.

"I just...thought that since I was up early and your friends had stayed the night, I would cook breakfast for everyone. You have a beautiful kitchen and plenty of food here," she said before turning back to the stove.

I sighed, "I blamed you...I blamed you for the longest time. For being the reason why I couldn't trust anyone. The reason why I fell in love with someone who didn't love me back. And now I can't be the mother to my child like I'm supposed to be because I'm alone when it comes to taking care of momma and your kids too."

She turned to face me again, this time with tears in her eyes, "I was fucked up in the head Kels. I couldn't have taken care of those girls and you know that."

"You were supposed to change," I countered, "You were supposed to become a better person, not choose drugs over your children and dumped them off on your sister and mother."

She turned off the stove and finished the rest of her cooking before replying, "I'm sorry. And you may not think of my apology as much, but I am sorry. That's why I've been in rehab these last few years because I wanted to change. I wanted to be there for my girls and watch them become women. Kels..." she approached the other side of the island, "I just want you to help me. Get a job, get a home and be abled to provide for them. I will pay you back no matter how long it takes, I just need your help."

I looked into her eyes. The ones that held unshed tears and the ones that looked so sincere and broken. "I will help you, but if you so much as look at drugs, even pill bottles, I will take it all away from you. Those girls need you and mama won't always be around Payton. You seriously have to do better."

"I'm going to do better, but it's time to talk about you and that young man in there..." She smiled and I couldn't help but return it.

"There is nothin-"

"Cut the crap Kels. August is fine. He's got a big future ahead of him and he could be fucking around with any female right now, but he chooses you. That boy likes you."

I frowned, "We've only been in each others life for a few weeks."

"And yet he done already had the cookie. You know you like him too, hell you went to his rescue last night," she argued while flailing her arms.

"I'm his manger."

"Bullshit. You could've called a driver. Hell, you could've taken him home last night, but yet, you brought him here," she grinned, "Admit it sister. You're in loooooove."

"Okay now you're just jumping to conclusions. Love? Really Pay?" She smiled at my old nickname for her.

"Yes Kel. You love him. You may not see that yet, but you will," she did that thing that mama did when she knew something I didn't. I hated it. I wasn't one for surprises and this whole thing with August was starting to get tiering.

Payton continued to get everything for breakfast ready.

But my thoughts continued to overwhelm me. Yes August was fine, there was no denying that. His sex was on point, there was no denying that, but he was just too much, too immature, too young. And I just got out of one horrible marriage/relationship, I don't need another.