jaemin
so i like her? i actually have feelings for her? this is so weird... i've never really felt like this about someone before... it's strange. but i like it...
i look at her as she looks at the ground, then placing my hand on her chin, softly tilting it up so her eyes meet with mine...
her beautiful... eyes...
i then move my hand to her cheek, caressing it with my thumb as i gaze into her eyes. holy fuck am i falling for her. she's so gorgeous i just can't contain myself. i look down at her plump lips, just wanting to kiss them. i just don't want to push her too far though because of what happened...
"y/n..? can i kiss you?" i ask. oh my goodness... that's the most retarded question i've ever asked in my life holy shit. she looks at me blank expression, but then nodding slowly and hesitantly.
i then look back at her lips, leaning in slowly, so if she changed her mind she could tell me. but her lips land on mine quicker than expected... since she's the one who got rid of the space between them. we softly kiss as silence is spread around the room. her lips are so soft... i could kiss them all day if she'd let me.
i try not to go to far, and i start to pull away. once our lips parts, my hand stays on her cheek as i look into her beautiful eyes once again.
"you're so beautiful, babydoll..." i tell her. she gives me a small smile, and i give her one in return. i remove my hand from her cheek, then using it to hold one of her hands. i take a look at my clock. It is 6:15
"are you hungry?" i ask her.
"a little..."
"do you want to get something to eat?"
"s-sure..."
"well what do you want to eat?"
"it doesn't matter to me..." she quietly says.
"well, then do you want to go get some ramen or something?" i ask.
"sure..."
she's so shy... why is she so different than how she was earlier? she seems so timid around me... and not all annoyed like at school. is it because i'm acting different? does she notice? do i make her nervous?
y/n
we get our shoes on, then going out the door into the car. as jaemin starts driving, i just look down at my lap.
"renjun took down the video." jaemin tells me. the video... i completely forgot about that... schools gonna be fun tomorrow when literally everyone has seen it. "but..."
"but..?"
"it already got to 400 likes by the time it was taken down... and basically everyone at our school has seen it..."
"that's... fine... i guess..." i say.
"really?"
if i was thinking how i was before, i would've just said "screw the video you can put it back up i just don't want to be with your stupid ass." but... i'm starting to think differently about jaemin... he's not all that bad... and i don't want for us to "break up" or whatever... but is it real? would he make me do things i didn't want to? he said i had to obey him... what will he make me do?
"let me see your hand for a second." jaemin says. confused, i lift up my hand, and he then touches it, intertwining his fingers with mine, and resting our hands on the middle part between the seats. he gives me a small smile as i hold his hand back. i then go on my phone, seeing another text from my mom.
mom
you better get back home by 6:30 or you're dead when you return. you will be grounded for a month with no phone. if i knew your passcode i would've already shut off your phone. consider yourself lucky.
"who texted you?" jaemin asks.
"my mom... she said if i don't get home by 6:30 i'm dead."
"do you want me to take you home? it's 6:25. we could maybe make it in time."
"no fucking way. i don't want to see her. she'll beat my ass."
"but if you get home later she'll beat it even harder." jaemin tells me.
he has a good point... but i don't want to go home... i don't want to see her...
"would you want to maybe sleep over at my place for tonight?" jaemin asks. i think about it. me? sleeping at jaemin's house? i'm not sure... but i'd rather do that than see my mom...
"if that's alright with you..." i say.
"of course."
"then sure... i'll sleep over."
"great."
we arrive to the place we're eating at, and we sit down and look at what they have, since there is more than just ramen there. once we order, i think of something. should i ask jaemin what we are? like if this boyfriend and girlfriend thing is real or just fake? but i'm scared he'll say it's fake... whatever. here i go.
"jaemin?"
"yeah?"
"are we real?" i ask.
"what do you mean..?"
"like... are we really boyfriend and girlfriend, or is our relationship just fake..?"
he takes a sip of water.
"what do you want us to be? real or fake?" he asks me. i think. if i say real he might think i'm desperately falling for him. but if i say fake, he'll think i'm completely uninterested in him and that i hate him which is most definitely not the case...
"um... i mean... i-i don't know."
"would you like for us to be real?" he questions, looking into my eyes. i then shyly nod my head, and jaemin slightly smiles.
"then let's try it. if you don't want to try then just tell me so, okay?"
"o-okay..."
things are a little quiet, until jaemin says something.
"but i'll warn you now... i won't be acting like this at school... the way i am at home is a lot different than at school... especially right now and with you... but... i can try to change... i honestly would want people to think different of me... that i'm not just some fuckbody that only likes having sex with anyone and everyone... so... yeah..." he tells me. i nod, then looking down at my my hands which are placed in my lap.
"are you scared?" he asks.
"not scared... just... nervous..."
"i promise i won't do anything bad... and i won't make you do anything too extreme but... please listen to what i tell you, okay?"
"okay..."
we get our food, and we then eat until we aren't hungry anymore. once we finish up, we get in the car, going back to jaemin's house...
