Psychosis

Chapter 47- The Windows To The Soul

Also, she hadn't had a proper chance to thank Reid for the weighted blanket. She, as promised, had tried it out the night she got it. At first, she had a feeling she wouldn't like it. She didn't like feeling trapped, and she was sure a weighted blanket would do just that. But, once she had slid in under it, it didn't feel like being trapped. No, it was soft and warm, and... it felt like a shield. It felt like it was protecting her from anything outside. And for the first time in a long time, she had completely slept through the night without any nightmares. Her only dream was.. well, she didn't really want to think about that.

Oh really? You don't? You don't want to think about the one nice dream you've had in forever? And how, on the rare occurrence you have a nice dream, the same man always happens to be in every single one of them?

Damn internal voice. Ciara never really liked it. It always told her the opposite of what she wanted to hear, whether it was lying to her when she was struggling to accept the truth, or telling her the truth when she just wanted to live in a lie. This time was the latter. The truth was, every time she actually had a nice dream, however rare that was, the same man was always in it. Ciara wished she knew who it was, but in every dream, she never actually saw him. But she knew it was always the same man. In her dreams, he always held her the same way, with the same warmth. But more than that, every time, she heard his voice.

It's all gonna be okay, Ciara. They won't ever hurt you again.

I've got you. I'll always have your back, Ciara. You know that, right?

Don't worry, I'll protect you. I won't let the monsters get to you. Trust me.

Ciara knew that the voice sounded familiar, but, despite her phonographic memory, she wasn't able to place it. But she did feel a smile prick at the edge of her mouth when she thought about the dream. Just like every time before, it had started off bad. A hoard of monsters was approaching her, threatening to tear her to shreds and fight over the scraps. At first, she thought they were going to get her. She had curled up into a ball and let herself scream, knowing it would probably be the last thing she ever did.

Then he showed up.

Just like he always did. Because her eyes were closed, she didn't know exactly what he did. But she felt the monsters disappear, and then he wrapped his arms around her, for in her dreams, she had no qualms of another person touching her like that. In her dreams, the past didn't exist. He then whispered those crucial words in her ears and hugged her a little tighter. Don't worry, I'll protect you.

If only the man existed in real life, and not just in her dreams.

But Ciara didn't have much longer to think about that. She was jolted out of her thoughts by the car stopping, and she looked up to see that they had, in fact, arrived. Ciara looked to the back of the car, turning so that Akilah couldn't see her, and glared at the fireworks that Akilah had boughten, gripping her headphones a little harder. Of course Akilah had picked out the biggest and brightest she could. She meant well and just wanted to make the party fun, but she was an idiot sometimes.

"Hey, if you keep looking at the fireworks like that, they're gonna go off, and then we'll both be dead."

And sometimes she was observant as hell.

"Yeah, okay. Let's just go." Ciara didn't even want to help carry the fireworks in, she hated fireworks that much. Instead, she put her headphones around her neck, placed her sunglasses on her head, and started walking to where she heard voices drifting from. She entered the yard quietly, not really wanting people to know she was there yet. The fact that she had trained for years in the art of invisibility certainly helped her. Instead of announcing herself, she simply walked over to where a pile of fireworks was, looking over them, wondering if she could get away with getting rid of any of them.