A Christmas Carol

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"Sir. Mister Sardick. We're only asking for one day. Just let her out for Christmas. She loves Christmas" a cryochamber is wheeled in, containing a young woman.

"Does she? Oh, does she? I see. Hello. Wakey, wakey. It's Christmas. Do you know what? I think she's a bit cool about the whole thing. Ha, ha! That was funny" Sardick laughs, the servants chuckle obediently.

"She's frozen," the young boy says.

"She's what, sorry?"

"She's in the ice. She can't hear you."

"Oh, what a clever little boy. You must be so irritated. How much?" a servant brings an account.

"Er, it's four thousand five hundred Gideons, sir."

"You took a loan of four thousand five hundred Gideons, and Little Miss Christmas is my security" another servant brings in a ringing candlestick telephone.

"We're not asking for her back. Just let her have one day. Let her have Christmas with us."

"Sir, it's the President."

"Tell him I'm busy. Now, where were we? Oh, yes. She's pretty, though, your daughter. Maybe I should keep her."

"She's not my daughter, sir."

"She's my sister. She volunteered for the ice when the family was in difficulties many years ago."

"Sorry, sir. The President says there's a galaxy class ship trapped in the cloud layer and, well, we have to let it land."

"Or?"

"Well, or it'll crash, sir."

"Oh. Well, it's a kind of landing, isn't it?"

"It's from Earth, sir, registering over four thousand lifeforms on board."

"Not if we wait a bit."

"You can't just let it crash, sir" the sound of the TARDIS arriving nearby goes unnoticed by everyone in the room.

"Says who? Oh, give it here" Sardick takes the telephone "look, petal, we already have a surplus population. No more people allowed on this planet. I don't make the rules" soot falls down the chimney "oh no, hang on, I do" Sardick hangs up the receiver "right, you lot. Poor, begging people. Off home and pray for a miracle" suddenly the Doctor tumbles out of the fireplace, I'm right behind him a shower of soot flies around us, I cough.

"Ah. Yes. Blimey. Sorry" the Doctor says helping me stand "Christmas Eve on a rooftop. Saw a chimney, my whole brain just went, what the hell" we both go to the family.

"Don't worry, fat fellow will be doing the rounds later. We're just scoping out the general chimney-ness. Yes. Nice size, good traction. Big tick" I say.

"Fat fellow?"

"Father Christmas, Santa Claus or, as we've always known him, Jeff," the Doctor says.

"There's no such person as Father Christmas," the young boy says.

"Oh, yeah?" the Doctor produces an old photograph.

"Me, her and Father Christmas, Frank Sinatra's hunting lodge, 1952. See him at the back with the blonde? Albert Einstein. The four of us together. Brrm. Watch out. Ok? Keep the faith. Stay off the naughty list" I spot what looks like a big cinema organ.

"Ooo. Now, what's this then? I love this. A big flashy lighty thing. That's what brought us here. Big flashy lighty things have got us written all over them. Not actually, but give us time, and a crayon. Now, this big flashy lighty thing is connected to the spire in your dome, yeah? And it controls the sky. Well, technically it controls the clouds, which technically aren't clouds at all. Well, they're clouds of tiny particles of ice. Ice clouds. Love that. Who's she?" I ask.

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