Memento Mori {A Series of Unfortunate Events}

•NINETEEN• In Which Some Kinda Bad Things Happen

Word Count: 695

"NO WAY." You crossed your arms and frowned. "Absolutely NOT. I am not dragging Miss Prissy up the waterfall in a sled. I say we leave her here and go up on our own. I can rescue Sunny while you distract the cronies."

"Alright, but, I mean... If we get caught, it could be disastrous." Violet reasoned.

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Violet made two more pairs of climbing boots and the four of you, Klaus, Quigley, Violet and yourself scaled the waterfall. When you reached the top, you saw eight people facing away from you. Count Olaf's five cronies: The bald man, the hook-handed man, the two old face-paint ladies, and the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender. There were also two people with the largest auras of menace you'd ever seen. A man with a beard but no hair, and a woman with hair but no beard.

"At last, after all these years!" The Woman With Hair But No Beard growled.

"We have eliminated the Baudelaires!" The Man With Hair But No Beard smiled as wide as Pennywise.

"I'VE GOT SOME BAD NEWS ABOUT THAT!" An annoying voice called from the other side of the mountaintop just as the four of you climbed over the waterfall's edge.

"Seriously." You grumbled, kicking snow off your boots. "She climbed up a different way? How'd she get out of that hot tub?"

"My fOuRtUnE!" Count Olaf cheered, his face lighting up like a little kid's when getting a new puppy as he caught sight of the four children that had just arrived at the top of the waterfall. 

"The Baudelaires." The Woman With Hair But No Beard and The Man With Hair But No Beard snarled.

"And these two other kids, Quiggleforth Quagmire and Little Miss Sarcasm." Esmé gestured vaguely.

"QUIGLEY!" Quigley corrected angrily.

"I've never been so happy to see you brats alive!" Olaf said in a sickeningly cheerful manner. "However did you trick them into coming up here, my pet?"

"She didn't trick us!" You stalked towards Esmé, your hands balling into fists. "We came up here all by ourselves, and we're not leaving without Sunny." You reached down into your boot and pulled out a long silver knife, threateningly waving it at the Woman With Hair But No Beard and the Man With A Beard But No Hair.

"Sunny Baudelaire is dead." The Man With A Beard But No Hair said, stepping forward and pinching the blade of your knife between his fingers; prying it out of your hand. You stood there in shock as the words sank in.

"She's not. There's no way she's dead." You whispered. "Oh, she is. Our favourite henchperson just threw her off that cliff moments ago." The Woman With Hair But No Beard said, pulling a dagger out of her coat pocket.

"HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO HER!" You shouted, launching yourself at her, fists flailing. You punched her in the gut and she slashed with her knife, leaving a deep cut four inches down your face. You lifted your hand to your cheek and felt the blood dripping, but you ignored it, continuing the attack. She kicked your legs out from under you and you fell to the ground. She dragged you up by your arms and held the knife to your throat.

"Y/N!" Quigley cried, but he was held back by Klaus, who gave a small jerk of his head that seemed to say "Wait."

"It was easy," Olaf drawled. "He just picked the baby's cage up and tossed her over the side. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, BOOM!"

Violet gripped Klaus's arm, sobbing silently. "No, no, no, no," She whispered.

"But it all worked out, because now, I have her." Olaf pointed a mottled finger at your face. "And as long as I have her, you'll do whatever I want to keep us from hurting her."

"No they won't!" You said dryly. "Just  go. It's my fault Sunny's dead and it's my fault we're all in this mess."

"We won't leave you-" Quigley started, but was interrupted.

"Kept, Limited, Meek, Nap-loving, Official-" The chant grew louder as Carmelita and her band of Snow Scouts marched up to the mountaintop.