Total Eclipse of the Heart

New Beginnings(Revised)

"Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it inflames the great."
― Roger de Bussy-Rabutin

It's said that distance makes the heart grow fonder and Abir Rajvansh can't help but agree. 3 months ago, circumstances forced him to let go of the love of his life for his brother's sake. 3 months, 90 days innumerable hours and not a day goes by in which he does not miss her. His phone lays forgotten somewhere because he knows that it won't ring up with the same name ever again. There is no point in keeping one now as he only got it to talk to her.

"Aik phone kyun nahi lay layti tum say baat karnay kay liay mari ja rahi thi" she had kept on insisting until he had finally relented. His favorite part of the day was night time because sleep brought forth memories of her and all the quiet dreams, he had kept to himself. It could be said that only at night you could witness the real Abir because he would strip of all pretense, grab his guitar and croon a soulful melody while reminiscing there time together. Every morning the an would wake up and wear a mask in front of his family. Pain was his old friend there was no point of sharing it at least not with them. Maybe like his heart even his pain demanded to be felt and shared with just one other person. A person his mother had managed to throw out of his life but could never throw out of his heart. Is it funny that he loved her even more now, more than he ever loved before? It was like the distance didn't even matter or at least his heart didn't care. His day started by looking at her picture just like it used to start by looking at her face the only difference was that the picture couldn't move , the picture would not scrunch up it nose like she used to , the picture wouldn't chant "Ajeeb Rajvansh tum kitnay ajeeb ho par jaisay bhi ho meray ho". The picture was static devoid of emotions just like he was ever since the day she walked out of his life.

Just like that it was the start of yet another day the same nightmare had woken him up. He had thrown away the pendant and called her parayi and later he was all alone as she had walked out .  Abir grabbed the photo frame from the side table and gazed at her picture she was smiling in it oblivious to the fact that he was clicking a picture of her. That smile it was always that damn smile that would make his heart skip a beat or was it her eyes that captivated him eyes that hid a million tales or was it her cute nose or her chubby cheeks or was it the whole of her who had intrigued the artist's soul within him. Who had made him wish on a wishing star, who had made him fall in love for the first time. As he looked at her a memory assaulted his brain "Main jaanti hu Abir kay tum mujh say kabi nahi kaho gay kay Mishti main tum say shaadi nahi kar sakta. Aisa karnay say pehlay Abir Rajavansh apni jaan dedega"

"Jaan toh dededi kyun kay tum meri jaan thi Mishti aur abb tum meray saath nahi ho ab toh main bas zinda hu. Abir Rajvansh toh ussi din mar gaya tha pata nahi kyun yay kambakth dil abhi tak dhahak raha hain na jana iss ko kis ka intezaar hain. Nadaan hain na yay nay jaanta kay mohabaat main kiay gaye wadhay na nibaho toh mohabat fanaa ho jaati hain" he said while looking at her pictures. He could feel his eyes welling up again and as a tear fell on his cheek he had no intention to wipe it off. Let it fall he thought "Jab dil roh raha hain toh main in aanso ko bhi kyun roku" he grabbed his aviators and put them on no one must know what he was going through. A smile graced his lips as he remembered that she had once joked that her glow would blind her to the extent that would have to wear shades alas it was not her glow but being separated from her had blinded him to the extent that everything around him seemed dark and gloomy. He closed his eyes mustering up the courage to get through another day.

As he closed his eyes 4000 miles away Mishti Aggarwal opened her eyes. The same nightmare had woken her up every day her brain would torture her with the memories of Abir throwing away the pendant and calling her parayi. 3 months, 90 days innumerable hours and yet she still loved him. She honestly tried to hate him she really tried but somehow, she was unable to detest him for what he had done. For every reason her brain used to give her to hate him her heart would conjure up multiple reasons to keep on loving him. So, she had given up, the heart wants what it wants and fortunately or unfortunately her heart still wanted him. Abir had loved her so deeply and so intensely that everything around her reminded her of him. She would see Abir in every red balloon, in every annoying PJ ,Nannu used to crack, in all the noodles she had started eating more often, in all the poetry she had started taking an interest in. One could say that she was in London but her heart well her heart was still back in Rajkot. She had stopped wearing spectacles all together because her last pair was the one given by Abir and she did not have the heart to change them. Mishti feared that like her dreams the spectacles might break too so she had carefully preserved them in a box. She sighed as she opened the drawer and took out the box. It contained her earring whose other pair she had lost somewhere, the bracelet he had given her and the ring that he had made her wear on that fateful day. That day she had though she finally had everything she ever wanted but alas all that was an illusion. Maybe it was fated maybe Mishti Aggarwal was destined to be let down by the people she loved with all her heart and soul. As she looked at his gifts a memory assaulted her brain "Pyar bohot qismat walon ko milta hian Mishti aur agar meri qismat main pyar hain toh main ussay aisay hi nahi janay du ga. I love you Mishti aur yay baat kabi mat bhoolna" and her eyes welled up with tears

"Main toh kuch nahi bhooli Abir shahid tum hi bhool gaye" she wiped away her tears reminding herself that she needed to be strong. She owed it to her Bade Papa and her Bade Maa. She grabbed her phone and opened the secret folder, the folder that contained pictures of them. Her favorite was the one she had clicked without him knowing he was busy in telling some story to the kids in the Ngo and it was always his child like expressions and his gleeful eyes that would make her smile. The fact that the 'Lambu Kahike' was still somewhat a little kid who had given a new meaning to her life the fact that this man still had the power to make her legendary bad day a bit better and the fact that despite everything that happened she could never hate him not even a little bit not even at all.

A few hours passed, Abir already had breakfast and was on his way to the office he dared not go to the NGO as everything there reminded him of her. As Abir checked his schedule for the day he felt an odd sense of foreboding. It felt like something was about to change. Maybe it was the start of something new.

"Shahid phir koi kahani shuru ho jis par naam humraha hain" while Abir was immersed in work Mishti had finally gotten up and had breakfast. Nannu reminded her that they needed to leave soon or else they could be delayed by the abysmal London traffic. As they got off the car and Nannu handed her the ticket he asked her "Mishti are you sure you are ready for this?"

"There is no point in hiding Nannu. Kabi na kabi toh wapis jana hain na and that place is my home and no matter how much we try to run away all roads lead you back to your home"

"Or perhaps all roads lead back to him "her heart suggested. It was time she returned home.